“They say that, ‘Patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings.’ Steal a little and they throw you in jail; steal a lot and they make you king. There's only one step down from here, baby. It’s called the land of permanent bliss. What’s a sweetheart like you doing in a dump like this?” Bob Dylan, Sweetheart Like You, Infidels, 1983
None can predict what might occur with certainty, though irrational behaviors often bring harm and ought to be avoided if possible. Don’t expect genius decisions from brains afflicted with dementia, parasites or syphilis. Legally and politically, ignorance is no excuse, but insanity does provide a lame defense. Madmen can be entertaining, about the only reason anyone nowadays acquires a name, evades blame, gains fame, or stakes a claim. One ought to hanker defining reality over sane washing absurdity. But as a criminal regime dawns, exemplary service in society’s interests secures yawns.
Andrew Wyeth (1930 to 2006) watercolor on board; artist is known for painting scenes from native Maine to Pennsylvania brimming with intense surrealism and magic realism.
“The truth knocks on the door and you say, ‘Go away, I’m looking for the truth.’ and so it goes away. Puzzling.” “When one person suffers from a delusion, it is called insanity. When many people suffer from a delusion it is called Religion.” Quality maniac Robert M. Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance (HarperCollins, 1974, 448 pp.), 50th anniversary
Before 2024 election, couldn’t get enough of Strike Force Five and their hilarious criticisms of sick cultists in diametric contrast, and sparkling wits such as John Stewart and Tim Miller (shown below in parent’s basement flanked by bicycle posters). Now they are too sad and tragically targeted to merit same attention. Entertainers and journalists who champion truths and expose lawmakers will always be the enemies of tyrants.
Compulsions to create authentic content instead spread fallacy pollution. You can read lies daily in salacious headlines drawing audiences to another dull presentation meant to meet deadlines. Social media uses artificial intelligence to score influence, and, since purchased by privileged immigrants, sift out disloyal or dissident participants. All you can legitimately do is avoid trolls, boycott nonsense, buy nothing, ignore clickbait, and resist despots. Meanwhile, the exact opposite coexists, modest titles fronting indispensable testimony, intangible religiosity,-and nontaxable charity.
Robert Isenberg, Mile Markers (Last Picked Books, 2024, 220 pp.), “A bicycle isn’t just a piece of sports equipment or a fun hobby. It is the purest innovation, a tool of liberation, the antidote for a million human woes.”
Complex phenomena come from random insufficiencies. Situations greatly vary. Seldom does one size fit all. Ice Road truckers don’t benefit as much from bicycle transportation as crosstown office commuters. Bicycles are labor saving devices compared to walking, but not while hauling tonnage. Who wants to be forced arbitrarily to do something more difficult than necessary? Jacques Derrida warned of torturing poets on a Procrustean Bed which sacrifices context for conformity. Old farts who plot violence and proceed unhinged against those they swore to serve will themselves, “Be hoisted with their own petard,”poetic justice of ironic outcomes, unintended suicides during terrorist bombings, not to be confused with pittards, leather gloves that protect well until outdoor winter trips trigger frozen fingertips.
After a year in America that saw historic investment in bicycling infrastructure and reciprocal equipment purchases, you’d naturally expect books, films, and songs to acknowledge and celebrate, and a dozen sparked recognition. Never underestimate the power of visual stimuli to shape perceptions and sway behaviors. Pick for yourself which one promotes prudent conduct.
Alcoholic divorcee Michael (Brian Stillar), known locally as Bike (Terrance Odette, dir., 2024), resorts to collecting bottles, raiding dumpsters, running errands, scrounging beers, and stealing bicycles. One assignment has him arduously messengering a mystery envelope up a steep escarpment. His one hope, to jumpstart a relationship with his teenage daughter, runs into a detour when he witnesses a drive-by shooting.
Camera Corner (Josh Weinberg, dir., 2024) documents Wende Cragg’s archive of thousands of photos of early mountain bikes and Marin County’s MTB community circa 1974.
In uplifting fact-based feature film Hard Miles (Daniel Hannah, dir., 2024), social worker Matthew Modine ushers juvenile delinquents serving soft sentences on an epic bicycle tour to Grand Canyon, aided by sag driver Cynthia Kaye McWilliams and wrench tech Sean Astin (Samwise Gamgee in LOTR). Everyone tumbles at least once on first attempt at using cleats.
Heretic (Bryan Woods and Scott Beck, dirs., 2024) follows Mormon sisters Barnes (Sophie Thatcher) and Paxton (Chloe East) blithely biking about, imposing their beliefs door to door, while seeking converts, until they arrive at the home of atheist psychopath Mr. Reed (Hugh Grant), lock up bikes, and shuffle indoors. Resembles empty promises and fraught visits on political campaigns. This grim film received 2 dozen award nominations.
Rebel Ridge (Jeremy Saulnier, dir., 2024) shows ex-special forces marine Terry Richmond (Aaron Pierre) run afoul of corrupt police in rural South. After they knock him off his mountain bicycle and confiscate cash with which he was planning to bail out his cousin, random Rambo mayhem commences.
Souleymane’s Story (Boris Lojkine, dir., 2024, in French) is portrayed by Abou Sangare, who delivers food in Paris by bicycle. To qualify for asylum, he must prepare an autobiography prior to a state inquiry. Was nominated for 10 awards and won 7.
Tess Parks - Some Days: The Bike Song From Beetlejuice Beetlejuice (Warner Bros. Pictures, Tim Burton, dir., 2024), “I don't like anything, but I love everyone some days... when the sun is out and good people are about it restores my faith.” Lydia Deetz’s psychic heir Astrid (Jenna Ortega) avoids colliding her bike with carelessly driven trucks but crashes through fence into the yard of Jeremy Frazier (Arthur Conti), who secretly designs her unsolicited destiny for his own expediency. Despicables dupe innocents, especially during elections. Living free is wondrous, withstanding afterlife monstrous.
We Are Rock n Roll (Justin Balog, dir., 2024) is a documentary of the American Criterium Cup, a series of up to 10 races for points for purses totaling $500,000.
Bicycle Film Festival is currently and virtually presenting BFF Classics, short films previously introduced during its 25 year history, through 31 March 2025. There will also be physical exhibitions of new works at various global locations including Copenhagen.
Pandemic doctor Daniela Schwendener gets revitalized by gravel bicycling on her Days Off (Liam Higgins, dir., 2022), an overlooked short from a few years ago promoting Cotic Bikes shot on location in England’s Peak District National Park.
Project A (Jackie Chan, dir.,1983) casts himself as Sergeant Dragon Ma Yue Lung and performs in martial arts battles including a frenetic bicycle scene set in Hong Kong alleys. What’s the goal of that silly slapstick sound at every kick?
Patricia Taxxon, Big Wheel, Bicycle, self, 2024 - Rambling aural experiment eventually gets around to lyrics: "The big wheel in the sky, he arcs o’er miles and miles... We can see the whole town from up here, feel the wind sail past our ears, the whistling noise it makes, so frigid and so fierce.”
Sunday, January 12, 2025
Thursday, December 26, 2024
Which Essain?
“Go forth, voyager, and imitate, if you can, this mighty avenger for freed men.” [Abi Viator, et imitare, si poteris, strenuum pro virli liberatis vindicatorem] - Jonathan Swift’s Epitaph
Saw Carl Sagan on a bicycle (Cosmos, Episode 8) speak about Albert Einstein riding his own bicycle while ruminating upon light speed, thus deriving Theory of Special Relativity. Nothing can travel faster than light, and light you emit while in motion isn’t additive. Later, during year’s first night ride along a lonely country road under headlights and starry skies, this thought thread led to recalling Hubble’s Constant (H0 = 7%/Gyr.) and red shift. Doppler is relative to one’s point of perception. No matter from which direction sound approaches, pitch rises, then lowers as it recedes, even when passing from behind at 90°. As do all cyclists inundated by phenomena, have heard this personally many times over, especially in light traffic under low visibility. Disgusted by those who deny or ignore such reality; science requires curiosity, logic, memory, and organized thought impossible while smashed, stoned, or stupid. Ignorance must be bliss, because being observant means more anxiety, suffering, and worry about what’s already wrong and what’s coming that’s worse.
While identifying worldwide bicycle brands, noticed how Asian makers don't mention who built them; individual contributions aren’t lauded or revered there as in the West; founders and workforce were considered functionaries who filled roles then were swapped out unceremoniously. Balance abhors extremes of conceit and humility. Although cultures vary, a lack of alternatives among paths to survival defines slavery. Buy-in expects rewards you trust. What’s left to incentivize workers or writers? Death threats? Fierce intimidation? Tire treads, too, almost imperceptibly daily get ground down eventually, ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
Latest bike boom seems to have stalled. Some blame elitist attitudes and LBS hubris. But politics do hugely influence sales. Contagion protocols, spiraling food and fuel costs, and supply chain disruptions boosted bike buys. But conservative nabobs in bed with Big Oil want to bury bicycling, because for many it’s a viable alternative to motoring and wasting fossil fuels, a dwindling state subsidized resource for which they overcharge for obscene profits. Their ill conceived tariffs will hike price of each Taiwan bike, by far world's biggest source. Republicans also object to Congestion Relief Zone Tolls, meant to free up Lower Manhattan’s streets for safety’s sake, whose proceeds partially fund bicycling advocacy. Meanwhile, GOP candidates got preponderance of campaign donations from sports team owners. These billionaires are burnt, because viewership for all sports are down based upon how exclusive they’ve become, yet you can’t even watch live broadcasts of local crits or major tours due to network bias against.
The Wheel magazine (New York, 1883) opined, “Of the city ordinance prohibiting bicycle riding in Central Park, bicyclers are as much entitled to consideration and provision for their enjoyment as the owners of carriages and light wagons. Discrimination against them on the ground that their vehicle is peculiar is simply absurd. To permit the owner of a light wagon to use it on any highway from which the bicyclist is excluded is an abuse of power...” Enter Jane Jacobs and her 40 years of social criticism covered in her centennial remembrance Jane Jacobs, Vital Little Plans: The Short Works of Jane Jacobs (Random House, 2016, 544 pp.) including essays Downtown Is for People, and Pedaling Together. If her nemesis urban planner Robert Moses had his way, he’d have replaced more bike friendly neighborhoods with multilane motorways.
Four Horsemen, Same Destination, Apocalypse
How many brainy essain [essays, swarms, or trials] does it take to escape fears and feel free? Which one will resonate effectively to save constitution and democracy? It’s no easy mission. Invert letters [essian] and you wind up in a wasteland. Apathetic people only heed repeated threats. Not all essayists grind their own axes and hone at-home causes; Busy bees and Labann published dire warnings against lawless monsters, but voters rather acquit and confer power to convicted psychopaths, known rapists, and media moguls who micromanage opinions. Between illogical misinformation and willful disinformation, goal of incessant lying is not to convince victims, but to discredit truth so no one believes anything. Philip Dick assumed, “If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use the words.” Were that true, deranged dictators would be under thumbs of cagey intellectuals, though this usually proves exactly the opposite. Dullard jocks bully timid nerds. Dimwitted hoodlums cower compliant sheep.
The longer you’re around, the more absurd your numbers sound, for example, 250,000 miles by bicycle, then 2,500 consequent pages about bicycling culture in an imaginative style AI could never imitate including definitive brands and songs indices beyond a 150,000 page career writing nonfiction. Just needed to do, but who did it serve? Septuagenarians should go fewer miles at higher frequencies to make up for when they were weekend warriors logging centuries. Similarly, activists must organize more protests against every unconstitutional policy that favors wealthy few over vast majority.
Candidates, congress, courts, networks, and press all colluded with oligarchy and hoodwinked voters this election cycle; survival is up to citizens now. Not everyone concerns themselves in everyday toil or knows how miles get trod in another’s shoes. Biking beats walking, but still requires physical effort many despise. Those who enjoy privileges of affluence, comforts, and intelligence are obligated to act wisely and exercise freedoms against tyranny and want, of religion and speech, to protect such rights and set examples. Office holders are supposed to serve public, not stuff own pockets with dark money due to Citizen's United. Democracy isn't broken, representation is; worse, perceived corruption legitimizes empty promises of remorseless swindlers.
After pro-Nazi Bund rally at Madison Square Garden in 1939, one supposes that 1970 and 1973 Nicks’ NBA championships there subsequently, and 53 amazing Grateful Dead concerts, had exorcised its villainy and restored its vibe. But in 2024 another hate filled fascist/racist rally occurred at MSG. How many Taylor Swift performances will it take to cleanse venue again? She’s already vowed not to appear in red states that betrayed care of citizens and rule of law. Blue states with brain trusts bailed them out for decades. CHIPS and Science Act of 2022 disproportionately benefits red state workers as a gesture of solidarity. Why bother?
With limited capacities and lifelines, humans conveniently sort everyone into dynamic groups: Ignorables, Givers, Reciprocators, and Takers. Some rate one’s circle of trust, or rather rhombus of doubt, square of condemnation, or triangle of suspicion. Such callous discriminations cast every feature film or stage play ever written, but never capture reality of individuals across lifetimes of development and withdrawal on a spectrum from benign to lethal. Aged ED leads directly to edgy evil devoid of empathy.
Ignorables are those you don’t know and will probably never meet despite fact they mean obligations for which you tacitly pay yet vociferously resent. Givers are altruists, lovers, mothers, and others who do for everyone else and expect little, perhaps gratitude, which slowly melts these saints into puddles of self. Masses prefer Reciprocators who trade whatever they have—effort, goods, produce, skills, time, wealth—quid pro quo for something they desire or need. Describes anticipated relationships among businesses, citizens, corporations, government, neighbors chipping in to defend nation and share in programs including bridge and highway repairs, child welfare, clean water, consumer protection, healthcare availability, law enforcement, retirement security, waste management, and whatnot... taken for granted though never guaranteed. Failure thereof is despicable, particularly treasury raids. Takers are deplorables, often born into or perverted by bad habits for which they were never punished; they develop antisocial personality disorders from which they abuse privileges, accumulate property, commit crimes, lord over others, never share fairly, take revenge, and use power bestowed upon them with brutality and impunity. What of the hypocrisy of rejecting vaccine immunity while requesting legal immunity?
Steps towards authoritarian rule pivot upon consolidating power and dehumanizing ignorables: Anyone unpaid deserving relief or meeting needs including homemakers, children with birth defects, ethic minorities, illegal immigrants, indentured servants, military families, retirees on pensions and social security, soldiers overseas, trafficked slaves, welfare recipients, and whoever has no champion and looks vulnerable enough to cut off, deport, enslave, forsake, murder or sacrifice without blowback. Hungry refugees can easily be cowered into kowtowing. That why republicans create recessions whenever they control congress, courts, or presidency. Educated, self assured, successful citizens see right through demented schemes of smug thugs; dolts don’t and get duped time and again. With a smile despots elevate criminals, exploit neutrals, and persecute innocents.
Every government improvement Labann ever suggested involved vetting a candidate’s character and competence, such as picking a president from among tenured senators. What happening is the opposite, anointing someone with least experience, who’s surrounding himself with loyalists of less competence, who’ll break laws to fulfill his lust for vengeance. This insincere Sin City crime syndicate has been flooding zones with culture wars (pedophilia, transgender) and petty issues (drones over Jersey), focusing on domestic purges, and using reflexive control, so you neglect monitoring enemies, domestic and foreign, real threats. USA has never been closer to World War III, largely because of disregard of constitutional compliance, democratic norms, national unity, and rule of law.
Because of conservative congressional votes and red state sovereignty, federal minimum wage remains $7.25/hour, and $2.00/hour at worst in Oklahoma. Former Secretary of Labor Robert Reich says of this rigged system, “Among American workers, the median wage of the bottom 90% has not increased, adjusted for inflation, in 52 years. Where did all the money go? It went to the top [10%].” Economists say a living wage depending upon where you reside would now be 2 to 3 times more, between $15 and $25/hour; blue states MA, NJ, NY, and WA now mandate $15/hour. Millions of American families occupy remote homesteads, usually without electricity, running water, or state services. Because so many can’t afford rents, 600,000 are still homeless. Property ownership began a downturn during Bush recession and its resultant mortgage crisis. But media predictions for and relentless caricaturization of Biden’s term as a failure were lies; GDP and stock markets hit historic highs, house values soared, 70,000 infrastructure projects began, and unemployment hit 50-year lows, but, no surprise, corporate profiteering and crony gouging incensed masses and incited voter discontent. When promised the opposite, 21% of Americans instead revisited conservatism that already failed them. More collectively but unsuccessfully chose progressive candidates. Too bad blue wave passes with election results. Be prepared to lose equity and savings when economy collapses.
A storm looms. Forget any promises to deflate grocery prices, improve 450 federal agencies, and prune $50 trillion in public debt. Expect whatever sweeps wealth into general fund, so it can be seized by same thieves who ceased taxes to trickle freeze billionaires, ran up deficit $8 trillion, and still hawk sleezy bibles and weird souvenirs to unwary cretins. Describing institutional counterpoints and reasonable regulations as “deep state” projects frustration of not being able to get away with atrocities. Immigrant deportations and government layoffs will result in disastrous job losses and escalating debt from revenue reduction. Affordable care, cancer research, food inspection, Medicare, school lunches, and Social Security will likely be curtailed among other programs. Lawless will be redefined as unloyal. Will Dick Wolfe’s cops and feds protecting public from fictional perps still get higher ratings than Hannity unreality? Fox's answer will be shutting down agencies to allow unchecked mayhem only they can report on, and stay on mission to make American democracy look not worth saving. Federal real estate, Fort Knox gold, national museum treasures, and whatever citizens own in common will be auctioned off to creditors and divvied up among oligarchs. Opponent asset/property seizures are probable. Cuts in entitlements for elderly and patients with existing conditions equal death sentences. Health, wealth, and wellbeing of citizens possess no priority within an agenda of embezzlement and enslavement. Next, financial institutions and insurance companies will be targeted for tax increases. This raises premiums and reduces returns, since costs are passed on to depositors and insurees.
International free trade is a war deterrent. It gives all parties reasons to avoid war because it risks own productive infrastructure and supply chains to resources not locally available. Rabid nationalists don’t grasp this subtle diplomacy. Intended to punish foreign traders and reboot domestic producers, tariffs attack trade, curb income, hike taxes, impoverish population, invite boycotts, and welcome isolationism, enough to drive entrepreneurs away, leaving only exempt billionaires and poor masses, who they’ll treat as slaves until they revolt. This scenario has often been repeated but never ends well. Zero sum games kill everyone alike, including alleged winners. A social contract of constitutional rights built USA into an economic powerhouse and world leader. China may boast of burgeoning growth, but America has been its main customer; another GDP downturn will preempt their plans and project weakness. If they can’t dominate trade, they’ll have to invade.
The diversity of hundreds of sovereignties suppresses evil bids for world domination and vile ambitions of megalomaniacs. Every territorial grab urges other countries to expand their empires as well. China eyes Korea, Taiwan, Thailand, and Vietnam, has already made inroads into Africa and South America, and owns expanses of American farmland. Incoming POTUS jokes of annexing Canada, Greenland, and Mexico as a half dozen USA states while ignoring protectorate Puerto Rico. Russian bots ferret out any social media discussion and input spin to counter anything that detracts from their political goals. FBI caught RT red handed bribing influencers to sway USA’s elections. As did Hitler, Mussolini, and Stalin, Putin had troops target Ukrainian bicyclists as a control tactic. Bicyclists evade capture, represent freedom, and spread intel among resistance, facts well documented by WWII historians. Despots can't allow that.
Preamble spells it out. “We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.” Amidst divisive splinters where are these unified blessings? Framer Thomas Jefferson warned, “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.” Whose freedom? What vigilance? Where has everyone’s yearning for justice gone? Worn down by a decade with no due process? When overrun by own government factions, 330 million disorganized residents who hitherto exercised freedom without responsibility forfeit whatever recourses they once had. Consensus on critical issues that once led to cooperative solutions now represents the greatest threat to authoritarian rule, therefore becomes its primary target for disruption.
If economic aid was offered to Russian people provided they’d overthrow Putin, threat of current war expanding throughout Europe would be mitigated. Inflation there is hovering at 23%/year. However, if you value sovereignty, you don’t go about toppling other governments; no, you abide will of their citizens, presuming they must be content with mismanagement, given they vastly outnumber rulers and own everything, at least on paper. Yet Russia actively provokes Americans into believing nonsense and fighting among themselves. Atychiphobic Putin is desperate to discredit democracy, because his autocracy is failing. Seeing hundreds of thousands of army age males fleeing country, with war against Ukraine going just about as well as Afghanistan, he doesn't want remaining subjects figuring out he's a foundering fraud. If you believe to build nation you must invade neighbors, you’ve misgoverned own domain and wasted citizens' resources.
What is a nation anyway? Blood may be thicker than water but it’s woefully less refreshing. America is the sum of its constituent diversity, each experimental component strengthening it as a whole. Confidence in 250 years of consistent entitlement to steer ship safely despite whatever comes along naively overlooks Civil and World Wars, elected domestic enemies, organized crime syndicates, and others who would rather burn it all down than revitalize democracy for mutual benefit, which means barring billionaires from buying influence. Downside of leveling a revenge curse is it diminishes both the sender and recipient. Dig 2 graves.
Doom and gloom are feckless holiday topics. People rather assess blame and blindly complain than resolve differences and solve problems. Hope demands action revealed by truths and resolved by efforts. Tyrants take no responsibility for their violence. Can myth and promise of an American way of life survive vultures circling? Wishing for a Christmas miracle won't cure malignant normality, a term recently coined by psychology scholar Robert Jay Lifton. After decades of abusing drugs, letting politicians raid treasury, and running up public debt, future you borrowed from is here to collect what’s it's owed.
“So Many Roads I know... Mountain high, river wide, so many roads to ride... all I want is one to take me home. So many roads tease my soul.” - Jerry Garcia and Robert Hunter, 1992
“When ya get half crazy from the August heat, or on a frozen rutted road with no one to complain to about your achin' feet, you're gonna walk that endless highway, walk that highway till you die… With the cost of livin’, and the price of dyin’, well it looks like t'me this time I wont be buyin’... I sing by night, wander by day. I'm on the road, and it looks like I'm here to stay.” - Again relevant Nobel Laureate Bob Dylan, Endless Highway, Before The Flood, 1974, half a century ago
Saw Carl Sagan on a bicycle (Cosmos, Episode 8) speak about Albert Einstein riding his own bicycle while ruminating upon light speed, thus deriving Theory of Special Relativity. Nothing can travel faster than light, and light you emit while in motion isn’t additive. Later, during year’s first night ride along a lonely country road under headlights and starry skies, this thought thread led to recalling Hubble’s Constant (H0 = 7%/Gyr.) and red shift. Doppler is relative to one’s point of perception. No matter from which direction sound approaches, pitch rises, then lowers as it recedes, even when passing from behind at 90°. As do all cyclists inundated by phenomena, have heard this personally many times over, especially in light traffic under low visibility. Disgusted by those who deny or ignore such reality; science requires curiosity, logic, memory, and organized thought impossible while smashed, stoned, or stupid. Ignorance must be bliss, because being observant means more anxiety, suffering, and worry about what’s already wrong and what’s coming that’s worse.
While identifying worldwide bicycle brands, noticed how Asian makers don't mention who built them; individual contributions aren’t lauded or revered there as in the West; founders and workforce were considered functionaries who filled roles then were swapped out unceremoniously. Balance abhors extremes of conceit and humility. Although cultures vary, a lack of alternatives among paths to survival defines slavery. Buy-in expects rewards you trust. What’s left to incentivize workers or writers? Death threats? Fierce intimidation? Tire treads, too, almost imperceptibly daily get ground down eventually, ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
Latest bike boom seems to have stalled. Some blame elitist attitudes and LBS hubris. But politics do hugely influence sales. Contagion protocols, spiraling food and fuel costs, and supply chain disruptions boosted bike buys. But conservative nabobs in bed with Big Oil want to bury bicycling, because for many it’s a viable alternative to motoring and wasting fossil fuels, a dwindling state subsidized resource for which they overcharge for obscene profits. Their ill conceived tariffs will hike price of each Taiwan bike, by far world's biggest source. Republicans also object to Congestion Relief Zone Tolls, meant to free up Lower Manhattan’s streets for safety’s sake, whose proceeds partially fund bicycling advocacy. Meanwhile, GOP candidates got preponderance of campaign donations from sports team owners. These billionaires are burnt, because viewership for all sports are down based upon how exclusive they’ve become, yet you can’t even watch live broadcasts of local crits or major tours due to network bias against.
The Wheel magazine (New York, 1883) opined, “Of the city ordinance prohibiting bicycle riding in Central Park, bicyclers are as much entitled to consideration and provision for their enjoyment as the owners of carriages and light wagons. Discrimination against them on the ground that their vehicle is peculiar is simply absurd. To permit the owner of a light wagon to use it on any highway from which the bicyclist is excluded is an abuse of power...” Enter Jane Jacobs and her 40 years of social criticism covered in her centennial remembrance Jane Jacobs, Vital Little Plans: The Short Works of Jane Jacobs (Random House, 2016, 544 pp.) including essays Downtown Is for People, and Pedaling Together. If her nemesis urban planner Robert Moses had his way, he’d have replaced more bike friendly neighborhoods with multilane motorways.
Four Horsemen, Same Destination, Apocalypse
How many brainy essain [essays, swarms, or trials] does it take to escape fears and feel free? Which one will resonate effectively to save constitution and democracy? It’s no easy mission. Invert letters [essian] and you wind up in a wasteland. Apathetic people only heed repeated threats. Not all essayists grind their own axes and hone at-home causes; Busy bees and Labann published dire warnings against lawless monsters, but voters rather acquit and confer power to convicted psychopaths, known rapists, and media moguls who micromanage opinions. Between illogical misinformation and willful disinformation, goal of incessant lying is not to convince victims, but to discredit truth so no one believes anything. Philip Dick assumed, “If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use the words.” Were that true, deranged dictators would be under thumbs of cagey intellectuals, though this usually proves exactly the opposite. Dullard jocks bully timid nerds. Dimwitted hoodlums cower compliant sheep.
The longer you’re around, the more absurd your numbers sound, for example, 250,000 miles by bicycle, then 2,500 consequent pages about bicycling culture in an imaginative style AI could never imitate including definitive brands and songs indices beyond a 150,000 page career writing nonfiction. Just needed to do, but who did it serve? Septuagenarians should go fewer miles at higher frequencies to make up for when they were weekend warriors logging centuries. Similarly, activists must organize more protests against every unconstitutional policy that favors wealthy few over vast majority.
Candidates, congress, courts, networks, and press all colluded with oligarchy and hoodwinked voters this election cycle; survival is up to citizens now. Not everyone concerns themselves in everyday toil or knows how miles get trod in another’s shoes. Biking beats walking, but still requires physical effort many despise. Those who enjoy privileges of affluence, comforts, and intelligence are obligated to act wisely and exercise freedoms against tyranny and want, of religion and speech, to protect such rights and set examples. Office holders are supposed to serve public, not stuff own pockets with dark money due to Citizen's United. Democracy isn't broken, representation is; worse, perceived corruption legitimizes empty promises of remorseless swindlers.
After pro-Nazi Bund rally at Madison Square Garden in 1939, one supposes that 1970 and 1973 Nicks’ NBA championships there subsequently, and 53 amazing Grateful Dead concerts, had exorcised its villainy and restored its vibe. But in 2024 another hate filled fascist/racist rally occurred at MSG. How many Taylor Swift performances will it take to cleanse venue again? She’s already vowed not to appear in red states that betrayed care of citizens and rule of law. Blue states with brain trusts bailed them out for decades. CHIPS and Science Act of 2022 disproportionately benefits red state workers as a gesture of solidarity. Why bother?
With limited capacities and lifelines, humans conveniently sort everyone into dynamic groups: Ignorables, Givers, Reciprocators, and Takers. Some rate one’s circle of trust, or rather rhombus of doubt, square of condemnation, or triangle of suspicion. Such callous discriminations cast every feature film or stage play ever written, but never capture reality of individuals across lifetimes of development and withdrawal on a spectrum from benign to lethal. Aged ED leads directly to edgy evil devoid of empathy.
Ignorables are those you don’t know and will probably never meet despite fact they mean obligations for which you tacitly pay yet vociferously resent. Givers are altruists, lovers, mothers, and others who do for everyone else and expect little, perhaps gratitude, which slowly melts these saints into puddles of self. Masses prefer Reciprocators who trade whatever they have—effort, goods, produce, skills, time, wealth—quid pro quo for something they desire or need. Describes anticipated relationships among businesses, citizens, corporations, government, neighbors chipping in to defend nation and share in programs including bridge and highway repairs, child welfare, clean water, consumer protection, healthcare availability, law enforcement, retirement security, waste management, and whatnot... taken for granted though never guaranteed. Failure thereof is despicable, particularly treasury raids. Takers are deplorables, often born into or perverted by bad habits for which they were never punished; they develop antisocial personality disorders from which they abuse privileges, accumulate property, commit crimes, lord over others, never share fairly, take revenge, and use power bestowed upon them with brutality and impunity. What of the hypocrisy of rejecting vaccine immunity while requesting legal immunity?
Steps towards authoritarian rule pivot upon consolidating power and dehumanizing ignorables: Anyone unpaid deserving relief or meeting needs including homemakers, children with birth defects, ethic minorities, illegal immigrants, indentured servants, military families, retirees on pensions and social security, soldiers overseas, trafficked slaves, welfare recipients, and whoever has no champion and looks vulnerable enough to cut off, deport, enslave, forsake, murder or sacrifice without blowback. Hungry refugees can easily be cowered into kowtowing. That why republicans create recessions whenever they control congress, courts, or presidency. Educated, self assured, successful citizens see right through demented schemes of smug thugs; dolts don’t and get duped time and again. With a smile despots elevate criminals, exploit neutrals, and persecute innocents.
Every government improvement Labann ever suggested involved vetting a candidate’s character and competence, such as picking a president from among tenured senators. What happening is the opposite, anointing someone with least experience, who’s surrounding himself with loyalists of less competence, who’ll break laws to fulfill his lust for vengeance. This insincere Sin City crime syndicate has been flooding zones with culture wars (pedophilia, transgender) and petty issues (drones over Jersey), focusing on domestic purges, and using reflexive control, so you neglect monitoring enemies, domestic and foreign, real threats. USA has never been closer to World War III, largely because of disregard of constitutional compliance, democratic norms, national unity, and rule of law.
Because of conservative congressional votes and red state sovereignty, federal minimum wage remains $7.25/hour, and $2.00/hour at worst in Oklahoma. Former Secretary of Labor Robert Reich says of this rigged system, “Among American workers, the median wage of the bottom 90% has not increased, adjusted for inflation, in 52 years. Where did all the money go? It went to the top [10%].” Economists say a living wage depending upon where you reside would now be 2 to 3 times more, between $15 and $25/hour; blue states MA, NJ, NY, and WA now mandate $15/hour. Millions of American families occupy remote homesteads, usually without electricity, running water, or state services. Because so many can’t afford rents, 600,000 are still homeless. Property ownership began a downturn during Bush recession and its resultant mortgage crisis. But media predictions for and relentless caricaturization of Biden’s term as a failure were lies; GDP and stock markets hit historic highs, house values soared, 70,000 infrastructure projects began, and unemployment hit 50-year lows, but, no surprise, corporate profiteering and crony gouging incensed masses and incited voter discontent. When promised the opposite, 21% of Americans instead revisited conservatism that already failed them. More collectively but unsuccessfully chose progressive candidates. Too bad blue wave passes with election results. Be prepared to lose equity and savings when economy collapses.
A storm looms. Forget any promises to deflate grocery prices, improve 450 federal agencies, and prune $50 trillion in public debt. Expect whatever sweeps wealth into general fund, so it can be seized by same thieves who ceased taxes to trickle freeze billionaires, ran up deficit $8 trillion, and still hawk sleezy bibles and weird souvenirs to unwary cretins. Describing institutional counterpoints and reasonable regulations as “deep state” projects frustration of not being able to get away with atrocities. Immigrant deportations and government layoffs will result in disastrous job losses and escalating debt from revenue reduction. Affordable care, cancer research, food inspection, Medicare, school lunches, and Social Security will likely be curtailed among other programs. Lawless will be redefined as unloyal. Will Dick Wolfe’s cops and feds protecting public from fictional perps still get higher ratings than Hannity unreality? Fox's answer will be shutting down agencies to allow unchecked mayhem only they can report on, and stay on mission to make American democracy look not worth saving. Federal real estate, Fort Knox gold, national museum treasures, and whatever citizens own in common will be auctioned off to creditors and divvied up among oligarchs. Opponent asset/property seizures are probable. Cuts in entitlements for elderly and patients with existing conditions equal death sentences. Health, wealth, and wellbeing of citizens possess no priority within an agenda of embezzlement and enslavement. Next, financial institutions and insurance companies will be targeted for tax increases. This raises premiums and reduces returns, since costs are passed on to depositors and insurees.
International free trade is a war deterrent. It gives all parties reasons to avoid war because it risks own productive infrastructure and supply chains to resources not locally available. Rabid nationalists don’t grasp this subtle diplomacy. Intended to punish foreign traders and reboot domestic producers, tariffs attack trade, curb income, hike taxes, impoverish population, invite boycotts, and welcome isolationism, enough to drive entrepreneurs away, leaving only exempt billionaires and poor masses, who they’ll treat as slaves until they revolt. This scenario has often been repeated but never ends well. Zero sum games kill everyone alike, including alleged winners. A social contract of constitutional rights built USA into an economic powerhouse and world leader. China may boast of burgeoning growth, but America has been its main customer; another GDP downturn will preempt their plans and project weakness. If they can’t dominate trade, they’ll have to invade.
The diversity of hundreds of sovereignties suppresses evil bids for world domination and vile ambitions of megalomaniacs. Every territorial grab urges other countries to expand their empires as well. China eyes Korea, Taiwan, Thailand, and Vietnam, has already made inroads into Africa and South America, and owns expanses of American farmland. Incoming POTUS jokes of annexing Canada, Greenland, and Mexico as a half dozen USA states while ignoring protectorate Puerto Rico. Russian bots ferret out any social media discussion and input spin to counter anything that detracts from their political goals. FBI caught RT red handed bribing influencers to sway USA’s elections. As did Hitler, Mussolini, and Stalin, Putin had troops target Ukrainian bicyclists as a control tactic. Bicyclists evade capture, represent freedom, and spread intel among resistance, facts well documented by WWII historians. Despots can't allow that.
Preamble spells it out. “We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.” Amidst divisive splinters where are these unified blessings? Framer Thomas Jefferson warned, “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.” Whose freedom? What vigilance? Where has everyone’s yearning for justice gone? Worn down by a decade with no due process? When overrun by own government factions, 330 million disorganized residents who hitherto exercised freedom without responsibility forfeit whatever recourses they once had. Consensus on critical issues that once led to cooperative solutions now represents the greatest threat to authoritarian rule, therefore becomes its primary target for disruption.
If economic aid was offered to Russian people provided they’d overthrow Putin, threat of current war expanding throughout Europe would be mitigated. Inflation there is hovering at 23%/year. However, if you value sovereignty, you don’t go about toppling other governments; no, you abide will of their citizens, presuming they must be content with mismanagement, given they vastly outnumber rulers and own everything, at least on paper. Yet Russia actively provokes Americans into believing nonsense and fighting among themselves. Atychiphobic Putin is desperate to discredit democracy, because his autocracy is failing. Seeing hundreds of thousands of army age males fleeing country, with war against Ukraine going just about as well as Afghanistan, he doesn't want remaining subjects figuring out he's a foundering fraud. If you believe to build nation you must invade neighbors, you’ve misgoverned own domain and wasted citizens' resources.
What is a nation anyway? Blood may be thicker than water but it’s woefully less refreshing. America is the sum of its constituent diversity, each experimental component strengthening it as a whole. Confidence in 250 years of consistent entitlement to steer ship safely despite whatever comes along naively overlooks Civil and World Wars, elected domestic enemies, organized crime syndicates, and others who would rather burn it all down than revitalize democracy for mutual benefit, which means barring billionaires from buying influence. Downside of leveling a revenge curse is it diminishes both the sender and recipient. Dig 2 graves.
Doom and gloom are feckless holiday topics. People rather assess blame and blindly complain than resolve differences and solve problems. Hope demands action revealed by truths and resolved by efforts. Tyrants take no responsibility for their violence. Can myth and promise of an American way of life survive vultures circling? Wishing for a Christmas miracle won't cure malignant normality, a term recently coined by psychology scholar Robert Jay Lifton. After decades of abusing drugs, letting politicians raid treasury, and running up public debt, future you borrowed from is here to collect what’s it's owed.
“So Many Roads I know... Mountain high, river wide, so many roads to ride... all I want is one to take me home. So many roads tease my soul.” - Jerry Garcia and Robert Hunter, 1992
“When ya get half crazy from the August heat, or on a frozen rutted road with no one to complain to about your achin' feet, you're gonna walk that endless highway, walk that highway till you die… With the cost of livin’, and the price of dyin’, well it looks like t'me this time I wont be buyin’... I sing by night, wander by day. I'm on the road, and it looks like I'm here to stay.” - Again relevant Nobel Laureate Bob Dylan, Endless Highway, Before The Flood, 1974, half a century ago
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Monday, November 4, 2024
Cultures Betain
“I could walk this fine line between elation and success... You'll have to prove it to me... You’re wasting time, yeah, every time. Whoa, I can't do it by myself.” - Fall Out Boy, Reinventing the Wheel to Run Myself Over [punk-pop], Take This to Your Grave, Fueled by Ramen, 2003
Among realms of intertwined relationships, bicycling culture lives where literary poiesis and sculptural kinesis intersect. Labann rides a rolling sculpture while making observations and recording revelations. Isn’t this what wordsmiths and wheelsmiths have in common? Two dichotomous gears may spin in opposite directions, but work effectively where they intersect.
Too often witness distressing signs that something’s gone awry: forgotten forests of fallen limbs, roadside vegetation smothered by manmade castoffs, and shuttered factories beside black streams swollen by soot-smeared snowmelt. Many say that aimlessly self propelling represents ineffective exercise and time wasted, but not to bicycle industry’s independent and myriad workers whose livelihoods depend upon it.
Croci don’t lie; once they bloom and die, temps soon equal age, a threshold to venture outdoors for many adult cyclists. On a dreary late winter spin suddenly realized that several streets en route were befittingly named - Armstrong, Columbia, Columbia again in a different town, Economy, Finance, Merida, and Wheeler, past Clement’s Marketplace, Continental Tire, Iron Horse Pub, Roadmasters Drivers School, and Singer Sewing Center of Coventry, not famous one in England where bicycle industry and international popularity began. Was reminded of alien hunting, bike sleuthing Wheeler family from Netflix series Stranger Things (Duffer Bros., dirs., 2016 to 2022) set in 1980’s Indiana, home to over 50 current or former bicycle builders. One may be strangely immersed in bicycling relevancy without noticing its legal pertinency. Cyborgs will never connect these dots.
Anyway, why do so many brands of bicycles, components, frames and tires exist? Talk about, “Reinventing the wheel.” Between 1878 to 1918 there were over 2,000 North American makers and tradenames, not to mention thousands of European counterparts and predecessors, each dabbling locally before distributing globally; neighborhood shops satisfied regional markets until a billion bicyclists emerged. Entrepreneurial barriers remain fewer than, say, automaking, farming, or mining. A bench, brazing rig, coffee pot, couple of jigs, garage out back, stock, tools, training, $25K in operating cash, website, and you’re in business. Gold mining (if you can find disappearing pay dirt or elusive mother lodes), opening a fast food franchise, and other such ventures start at $250K, 10x more than a framemaking startup, with just as little chance of success.
Frame weld grinding, image from a bank loan ad
“The bike market isn't such a golden opportunity that you can just dive in and get rich. It's a tough market for anybody, especially a small company. To even stand a chance, you have to stand for something... Diversity is a good thing... a sign of health... but I'm not sure how much ‘velodiversity’ there will be in the future. Big fish eat little fish.”—Grant Petersen, formerly of Bridgestone USA, founder of Rivendell Bicycle Works
Although brands appear and disappear at an alarming rate, can’t ever call a brand defunct, only discontinued; not only are riders rebuilding or still using vintage antiques, names sometimes get revived, whether by legal means on license or in violation of international trademark laws trying to cash in on someone’s else earned reputation. Makes it hard to condemn or validate when retail shops haphazardly slap own names on bikes manufactured by someone else. Hot blooded egotists are ever eager to claim credit, same reason a tall ugly building carries name of someone tangentially involved with its construction.
Marketshare dominators buy or crush competitors, but sometimes lose anyway. Disturbs how many brands today have automotive parents, though other automakers’ roots lie in bike building. Not so celebrated are origins among sewing machines and small arms, though controversial apparel always played a significant role. Starley figured laid-off workers who had been building sewing machines could easily knock off French bicycles, so saved Coventry from recession. Beset by pandemic disruption of supply chain, and previously outcompeted by cheap oriental imports, local builders have rallied.
“There's a terrible delight in watching a rival sink without a trace.”—Bernard “The Badger” Hinault
First arguable depiction of a bicycle comes from Codex Atlanticus, a compilation of drawings by Leonardo da Vinci. Half a millennium later, bicycles are flourishing as one of humanity’s most persistent technologies. Bike&Chain emerged to study their broad impact. After a nudge by Baden’s democratic reformer Baron Von Drais in1818, discrediting Russian claims of Yefim Artamonov’s 1801 invention and spurious bicycle nationalisms, a burgeoning global workforce had produced 4 billion completed bicycles before their bicentennial, and, according to industry estimates, surviving manufacturers are currently pumping out 4 complete units per second.
Winslow Homer, The New Year - 1869, pen and ink drawing, 155 years ago, soon after American Civil War concluded, thus creating opportunities for gun makers to diversify into newfangled bicycles
Accuracy in tracking details that every self-styled historian quibbles over forever faces data blackouts and misinformation campaigns from geopolitical adversaries, who, unlike western democracies, don’t recognize any individual contribution or share methods of production. Low priced knockoffs slapped together by Asian slave labor buried many Western brands. Learning only comes from direct investigation and hands-on history; classes, lists, memoirs, news, and texts only point in that direction.
Actually, the best bike is one you get your budget and butt to like, because few can afford to own bespoke perfection, which you’d be too afraid to spring from a vault to take a spin. Cyclists can be real divas picking handmades to reflect own preferences and prejudices. But if box store models fulfilled every need, and one size did fit all, you wouldn’t have to order a custom frameset and precious gruppo to assemble one for yourself. No two bicyclists are the same. Slim jockeys want carbon or titanium throughout; substantial clydesdales want reliable steel. Choice is all about pain you’ve endured and hope to avoid. Bikes resemble boots that last a lifetime provided they fit properly, your feet don’t grow, and you take scrupulous care of them. If one must mull over analogies, diverse brands as they relate to engineering experiments mimic myriad recipes for same gourmet cuisine.
Alphanumeric soup of tradenames rivals plethora of marketing terms for what are, for the most part, bi-wheeled diamond framed contraptions. You might feel sure you can differentiate a city bike from a fixie, or a hardtail enduro from an MTB, or a randonneur (what Brits call audax) from a tourer, but anarchy rules and categories blur. Though they look like road bikes or ten-speeds, cyclocross (XC) and gravel bikes have fatter tires and wider crotches. Frame materials vary from aluminum, bamboo, carbon fiber, chromoly, composites, exotic alloys, hardwoods, monocoque, nonferrous metals, to plain steel. Most are completed with bits and cogs from different manufacturers, though designs and geometries have to mate to work. For example, high end road bikes come without pedals, another personal preference along with handlebars and saddles. Used to be English, French or Italian were only choices, but trends now include all sorts of proprietary and unique combinations that complicate repairs. Savvy cyclists squirrel away wear parts to sell, swap, or use decades later.
Labann says what once was, still is, but won’t state what will be, what world yearns to ascertain, future trends. Laufmaschine, ordinary, then safety: Missus still wears bracelet charms depicting a Michaudine, the original boneshaker. For Scots, a “shank’s nag’ means legging it on foot sans conveyance convenience; meanwhile, “bike” signifies a throng of creatures or persons en masse. Japanese use term “bicycle operation” (Jitensha sōgyō) for any business barely kept going, because when you don’t continuously pedal it falls. Names abound for bicycles around planet including amabhayisekili, audax, axe, baidhsagal, bakfiet, basikal, bayisikalaya, bécane, beic, bелосипед, bhasikoro, bici, biciletta, bicyclette, biciklo, bike, bixi, BMX, breezer, cạkryān, célérifere, charinko, ciclo, corsa, cruiser, cykel, daraaja, delta, digital bike, draisine, dviratis, e-bike, elektrofahrrad, enduro, EPAC, fahrrad, fatbike, fiet, fixed gear, fixie, freedom machine, fyts, gaali, handcycle, hardtail, hetsaniv, high wheeler, hobby-horse, HPV, hybrid, ibhayisikili, icugutu, igare, iron horse, jajeongeo, jalgratas, jitensha, jízdní, joker, keke, kerékpár, klunker, kolo, keirin, keke, lemon peeler, mama-chari, mixte, mountain bike, MTB, njinga, omafiet, opafiet, orange krate, paesekela, paikikala, paihikara, pedalcar, pedelec, pennyfarthing, pista, ποδήλατο (podílato), polkupyörä, pushbike, quadracycle, rad, randonneur, recumbent, reiðhjól, roadie, roadster, rower, rothar, roti, saikil, sakre, sapédah, scorcher, sepeda, silver steed, singlespeed, stadtrad, steelie, step-through, sykkel, tadpole, tandem, ten-speed, thirsakawr, tricycle, trike, twenty-niner, two-wheeler, uila vilivae, unadag dugui, VAE, velo, velocipede, velosiped, VTT, wheel, wisikilita, Xe đạp, xikanyakanya, xithuthuthu, zitensya, and zìxíngchē with numerous variations thereof. Labann lists thousands of tradenames, plus multiple models under each, a surplus of sobriquets.
Since internet postings only ever offer subsets, Labann merged brand lists from all over, without prejudice for marketshare or origin. Only requirement for inclusion was independent corroboration; some once cited didn’t appear to exist after investigation, or turned out to be retail outlets only. Given bike forums, book barrages, life experiences, and Google searches, it’s disappointing no one bothered to capture this entirely, an affront to millions of craftspersons and factory workers who provided the cleanest form of transportation over last 2 centuries. No wonder it took 5 years to compile this homage, another long list, along with discography, filmography, and terminology. There would be no bicycling culture without buyers and makers.
Labann’s List augments Bike&Chain’s appendices, covers 6,800 brands but not models, describes histories and products sold, and summarizes extent of what, when, where, who, but not ineffable why, which even Jean-Paul Sartre, see below, struggled with. It’s a solid first pass. Despite every effort to be comprehensive, entries may have been limited by bad business practices of makers too coy, disreputable, or timid to disclose own information. At end of list a bibliography provides several links to more extensive resources, none that demand cookie installation or personal information just to find simple facts, because historical data and marketing details loose in public domain should be freely accessible.
Spreadsheet bolds brands with greatest influence, though every entry, however obscure or pusillanimous, affected acceptance to some degree and served its purpose. Such a survey feels like meeting thousands of likeminded individuals, or not, when makers, often Chinese, don’t want to acknowledge minion or reveal country of origin. Unlike a database, this list can simply be searched or scrolled to find what you’re looking for. For collectors, the most sought out units are legendary, oldest and rarest, though a painting depicting a bicycle can accrue value quicker than bike itself.
Boundaries are lame excuses, but even encyclopedias overlook minutia outside their scope, so only included complete assemblages, components, supplies, and tools, not beverages, food, random stuff you might carry, scooters, skateboards, or unicycles, which are not bicycles or tricycles. If you abbreviate or encapsulate something enormous, fools think that’s all there is, yet too much information ages a list faster. Complexity and extent induce fear and stress. Facts set in stone may make historians comfy, but who can rely on anything said? Some current industry lists may delve deeper. Brand names are seldom repeated, even intentionally. Rarely is any cyclist interested in all equally, often content to limit involvement to only a few. At least own consolidates scores of other lists, may expand consciousness or open investigations, and was disseminated for free.
“When it comes to bicycles, I often find that truth is more of a stranger than fiction.”—Mike Sweatman, Disraeli Gears
Does where a bike is made matter less than how it’s made, or what it consists of, or who built it? A purely monetary approach might mean dealing with distributors who source from slavers overseas, thereby not supporting local workers, who then get laid off, so steal your bicycle to trade for necessities. Custom builds require your presence as if having a suit tailored. Some builders became legendary by figuring out how to make bikes go faster, last longer, and work better. Others deserve to be called out as charlatans, incompetents, or thieves. Internet scams are rampant, tempting low prices for equipment never delivered despite hefty downpayment.
Disclaimer: Details are from best input and latest intel, not guaranteed accurate, complete, or current. To reiterate, “Complete is a term used only by isolated idiots who ignore linguistics and locales.” You must include Africa and Asia, think America to New Zealand, track from today to yesteryear. No disrespect is intended by errors or exclusions, though you can see how premier brands might not want to be linked with budget or hobby offerings. “Discontinued” doesn’t mean never to be revived, nor still desirable and widely sold, particularly frames, often easily restored. NOS (New Old Stock) is a viable business among resellers serving restorers. Supply chain shortfalls of COVID pandemic pushed businesses to the brink and over. World wars likewise ended a number of brands. Yet lately there’s been a rush to profit off latest electrical and material tech.
Issues over identifying brand names abound. A brand might imply a reputation for quality not necessarily preserved after business was acquired, divested, or merged. Some actually build, i. e., Bianchi, versus procure, i. e., Gucci. Some are strictly OEM, furnish components or entire bicycles, but have no brand presence in markets, i. e., United Bicycle. Many only distribute locally, have no sales network, rely on websites or word-of-mouth. Can you even call one-offs “brands” at all? Bespoke, custom, handmade fabricators individually match bicycles to needs, but can easily be confused with distributors and local bike shops, who assemble units, collect input, go between, but never personally manufacture, per se. Purists and those who pedal for exercise might exclude electric assisted bikes altogether as motored rather than self propelled, thereby generating controversies on bikeways.
Brand names come from many sources. Could be an acronym, distributor fancy, function of bike material, maker surname, marketing nonsense, mythical character, name of some champion who had nothing to do with manufacture, place of origin, person who built, shop that sourced then sold, stolen from another brand, or whatnot. Almost 2 dozen were tagged Royal, obviously not built by monarchy. Some manufacturers slap dozens of different names on same product to see which one competes best for marketshare. As if shorthand, bicyclists usually refer to components by models and skip brands, i.e., Chorus, not Campagnolo, or Dura Ace, not Shimano. Consumers alternately and indiscriminately call assembled units by attached badge/decal or name of distributor/manufacturer. Consider this a quest to sort it all out.
What do birds, cats, frogs, pigs, or stingrays have to do with cycling? Bees, bicyclists, bike builders, and birds either flock together or fly solo. Collectively, they unintentionally accompany one another so often it disturbs when they don’t. Anyway, bicycles you see leaning beside or rolling by roadside will never be a single brand, but an amalgam of many. Without benefits of mass production, bespoke makers must charge twice as much, not such a bad thing since it spreads wealth. Although frames might last a lifetime, every other component will likely need replacement, some several times, such as brake shoes, cables, cassettes, chains, spokes, tires, tubes, and wheels.
Makers made famous by champion endorsements contrast with nobodies whom they’ve encouraged, squeegee wretches desperate to clear windshields separating drivers from bicyclists. Successful old time makers were often directly tied to rubber tire and steel tubing suppliers; thereby one stimulated sales for the other. Distributors and retailers might have house brands they promote alongside others for which they are licensed to assemble. Descriptions get really murky with company acquisitions, incessant change, joint ventures, leveraged buyouts, and successive mergers. Consolidations and takeovers ended some diehards resting on laurels and swindling investors. Industry has always had a convoluted history with drudgery and sweat taken for granted by consumers, insurers, owners, public, regulators, and tax revenuers. Nevertheless, you’ve got to acknowledge millions of burns, broken bones, bruises, busts, cuts, and scrapes it took to put 4 billion bikes on the road to date.
"To possess a bicycle is to be able first to look at it, then to touch it. But touching is revealed as being insufficient; what is necessary is to be able to get on the bicycle and take a ride. But this gratuitous ride is likewise insufficient; it would be necessary to use the bicycle to go on some errands. And this refers us to longer uses ... But these trips themselves disintegrate into a thousand appropriative behavior patterns, each one of which refers to others. Finally, as one could foresee, handing over a bank note is enough to make the bicycle belong to me, but my entire life is needed to realize this possession. In acquiring the object, I perceive that possession is an enterprise which death always renders still unachieved... In making use of my bicycle, I use it up—wear it out; that is, continuous appropriative creation is marked by a partial destruction. This wear can cause distress for strictly practical reasons, but in the majority of cases it brings a secret joy, almost like the joy of possession; this is because it is coming from us—we are consuming. It should be noted that the word “consume” holds the double meaning... To consume is to annihilate and it is to eat; it is to destroy by incorporating into oneself. If I ride on my bicycle, I can be annoyed at wearing out its tires because it is difficult to find others to replace them; but the image of enjoyment which my body invokes is that of a destructive appropriation, of a ‘creation-destruction.’ The bicycle gliding alone, carrying me, by its very movement, is created and made mine; but this creation is deeply imprinted on the object by the light, continued wear which is impressed on it and which is like the brand on the slave. The object is mine because it is I who have used it; the using up of what is mine is the reverse side of my life.“—Jean-Paul Sartre, L'Être et le néant [Being and Nothingness], 1943
World’s biggest current retailers, either through e-commerce websites or multiple stores (or both), include but are not limited to:
Amazon, number one retailer of everything, founded in 1994 to sell books, now a reliable conduit among consumers, importers, makers, and sellers
Bicycle Warehouse, since 1992, West Coast, USA
Bike Exchange, since 2007, 223 stores across USA
Chain Reaction Cycles, since 1984, Wiggle-CRC Group (subsidiary of Signa Sports), UK
Conte’s, since 1957, Baltimore, MD, USA
Decathlon, since 1976, Europe’s leading bicycle retailer
Dick’s Sporting Goods, since 1948, 850+ Stores, USA
Erik’s Bike Board, since 1980, Midwest, USA
Jenson USA, since 1996
Landry’s Bicycles, since 1922, Massachusetts, USA
Merlin Cycles, UK and USA, since 1993
Mike’s Bikes, since 1964, Marin, California, USA
Nashbar, since 1974; now owned by AMain Sports & Hobbies, Chico, CA, USA
Performance Bicycle, since 1981; once partnered with Nashbar, Chico, CA, USA
Planet Cyclery, Broomfield, CO, USA
REI Co-op, since 1938, 39 US states
Richardson Bike Mart, since 1962, several Texas locations, USA
Sigma Sports, since 1992, UK
Scheels, since 1902, 13 central US states
Trek Bicycle, since 1976, 100+ stores, USA
Wheel & Sprocket, since 1973, Midwest, USA
Lastly, must credit every author, blogger, correspondent, distributor, magazine editor, reporter, and whoever haphazardly and slowly doles out data, usually for a paycheck, sticks their smutty noses into this sweaty business, and summarizes with incomplete lists with some preposterous presumption of copyright ownership of information already in public domain. Bicycle culture and Tour de France was begun by sports magazine publisher Henri Desgrange way back in 1903. Participants tragicomically and transparently try to cement sales and create rivalries. Ignoring them altogether never ends well.
Among realms of intertwined relationships, bicycling culture lives where literary poiesis and sculptural kinesis intersect. Labann rides a rolling sculpture while making observations and recording revelations. Isn’t this what wordsmiths and wheelsmiths have in common? Two dichotomous gears may spin in opposite directions, but work effectively where they intersect.
Too often witness distressing signs that something’s gone awry: forgotten forests of fallen limbs, roadside vegetation smothered by manmade castoffs, and shuttered factories beside black streams swollen by soot-smeared snowmelt. Many say that aimlessly self propelling represents ineffective exercise and time wasted, but not to bicycle industry’s independent and myriad workers whose livelihoods depend upon it.
Croci don’t lie; once they bloom and die, temps soon equal age, a threshold to venture outdoors for many adult cyclists. On a dreary late winter spin suddenly realized that several streets en route were befittingly named - Armstrong, Columbia, Columbia again in a different town, Economy, Finance, Merida, and Wheeler, past Clement’s Marketplace, Continental Tire, Iron Horse Pub, Roadmasters Drivers School, and Singer Sewing Center of Coventry, not famous one in England where bicycle industry and international popularity began. Was reminded of alien hunting, bike sleuthing Wheeler family from Netflix series Stranger Things (Duffer Bros., dirs., 2016 to 2022) set in 1980’s Indiana, home to over 50 current or former bicycle builders. One may be strangely immersed in bicycling relevancy without noticing its legal pertinency. Cyborgs will never connect these dots.
Anyway, why do so many brands of bicycles, components, frames and tires exist? Talk about, “Reinventing the wheel.” Between 1878 to 1918 there were over 2,000 North American makers and tradenames, not to mention thousands of European counterparts and predecessors, each dabbling locally before distributing globally; neighborhood shops satisfied regional markets until a billion bicyclists emerged. Entrepreneurial barriers remain fewer than, say, automaking, farming, or mining. A bench, brazing rig, coffee pot, couple of jigs, garage out back, stock, tools, training, $25K in operating cash, website, and you’re in business. Gold mining (if you can find disappearing pay dirt or elusive mother lodes), opening a fast food franchise, and other such ventures start at $250K, 10x more than a framemaking startup, with just as little chance of success.
Frame weld grinding, image from a bank loan ad
“The bike market isn't such a golden opportunity that you can just dive in and get rich. It's a tough market for anybody, especially a small company. To even stand a chance, you have to stand for something... Diversity is a good thing... a sign of health... but I'm not sure how much ‘velodiversity’ there will be in the future. Big fish eat little fish.”—Grant Petersen, formerly of Bridgestone USA, founder of Rivendell Bicycle Works
Although brands appear and disappear at an alarming rate, can’t ever call a brand defunct, only discontinued; not only are riders rebuilding or still using vintage antiques, names sometimes get revived, whether by legal means on license or in violation of international trademark laws trying to cash in on someone’s else earned reputation. Makes it hard to condemn or validate when retail shops haphazardly slap own names on bikes manufactured by someone else. Hot blooded egotists are ever eager to claim credit, same reason a tall ugly building carries name of someone tangentially involved with its construction.
Marketshare dominators buy or crush competitors, but sometimes lose anyway. Disturbs how many brands today have automotive parents, though other automakers’ roots lie in bike building. Not so celebrated are origins among sewing machines and small arms, though controversial apparel always played a significant role. Starley figured laid-off workers who had been building sewing machines could easily knock off French bicycles, so saved Coventry from recession. Beset by pandemic disruption of supply chain, and previously outcompeted by cheap oriental imports, local builders have rallied.
“There's a terrible delight in watching a rival sink without a trace.”—Bernard “The Badger” Hinault
First arguable depiction of a bicycle comes from Codex Atlanticus, a compilation of drawings by Leonardo da Vinci. Half a millennium later, bicycles are flourishing as one of humanity’s most persistent technologies. Bike&Chain emerged to study their broad impact. After a nudge by Baden’s democratic reformer Baron Von Drais in1818, discrediting Russian claims of Yefim Artamonov’s 1801 invention and spurious bicycle nationalisms, a burgeoning global workforce had produced 4 billion completed bicycles before their bicentennial, and, according to industry estimates, surviving manufacturers are currently pumping out 4 complete units per second.
Winslow Homer, The New Year - 1869, pen and ink drawing, 155 years ago, soon after American Civil War concluded, thus creating opportunities for gun makers to diversify into newfangled bicycles
Accuracy in tracking details that every self-styled historian quibbles over forever faces data blackouts and misinformation campaigns from geopolitical adversaries, who, unlike western democracies, don’t recognize any individual contribution or share methods of production. Low priced knockoffs slapped together by Asian slave labor buried many Western brands. Learning only comes from direct investigation and hands-on history; classes, lists, memoirs, news, and texts only point in that direction.
Actually, the best bike is one you get your budget and butt to like, because few can afford to own bespoke perfection, which you’d be too afraid to spring from a vault to take a spin. Cyclists can be real divas picking handmades to reflect own preferences and prejudices. But if box store models fulfilled every need, and one size did fit all, you wouldn’t have to order a custom frameset and precious gruppo to assemble one for yourself. No two bicyclists are the same. Slim jockeys want carbon or titanium throughout; substantial clydesdales want reliable steel. Choice is all about pain you’ve endured and hope to avoid. Bikes resemble boots that last a lifetime provided they fit properly, your feet don’t grow, and you take scrupulous care of them. If one must mull over analogies, diverse brands as they relate to engineering experiments mimic myriad recipes for same gourmet cuisine.
Alphanumeric soup of tradenames rivals plethora of marketing terms for what are, for the most part, bi-wheeled diamond framed contraptions. You might feel sure you can differentiate a city bike from a fixie, or a hardtail enduro from an MTB, or a randonneur (what Brits call audax) from a tourer, but anarchy rules and categories blur. Though they look like road bikes or ten-speeds, cyclocross (XC) and gravel bikes have fatter tires and wider crotches. Frame materials vary from aluminum, bamboo, carbon fiber, chromoly, composites, exotic alloys, hardwoods, monocoque, nonferrous metals, to plain steel. Most are completed with bits and cogs from different manufacturers, though designs and geometries have to mate to work. For example, high end road bikes come without pedals, another personal preference along with handlebars and saddles. Used to be English, French or Italian were only choices, but trends now include all sorts of proprietary and unique combinations that complicate repairs. Savvy cyclists squirrel away wear parts to sell, swap, or use decades later.
Labann says what once was, still is, but won’t state what will be, what world yearns to ascertain, future trends. Laufmaschine, ordinary, then safety: Missus still wears bracelet charms depicting a Michaudine, the original boneshaker. For Scots, a “shank’s nag’ means legging it on foot sans conveyance convenience; meanwhile, “bike” signifies a throng of creatures or persons en masse. Japanese use term “bicycle operation” (Jitensha sōgyō) for any business barely kept going, because when you don’t continuously pedal it falls. Names abound for bicycles around planet including amabhayisekili, audax, axe, baidhsagal, bakfiet, basikal, bayisikalaya, bécane, beic, bелосипед, bhasikoro, bici, biciletta, bicyclette, biciklo, bike, bixi, BMX, breezer, cạkryān, célérifere, charinko, ciclo, corsa, cruiser, cykel, daraaja, delta, digital bike, draisine, dviratis, e-bike, elektrofahrrad, enduro, EPAC, fahrrad, fatbike, fiet, fixed gear, fixie, freedom machine, fyts, gaali, handcycle, hardtail, hetsaniv, high wheeler, hobby-horse, HPV, hybrid, ibhayisikili, icugutu, igare, iron horse, jajeongeo, jalgratas, jitensha, jízdní, joker, keke, kerékpár, klunker, kolo, keirin, keke, lemon peeler, mama-chari, mixte, mountain bike, MTB, njinga, omafiet, opafiet, orange krate, paesekela, paikikala, paihikara, pedalcar, pedelec, pennyfarthing, pista, ποδήλατο (podílato), polkupyörä, pushbike, quadracycle, rad, randonneur, recumbent, reiðhjól, roadie, roadster, rower, rothar, roti, saikil, sakre, sapédah, scorcher, sepeda, silver steed, singlespeed, stadtrad, steelie, step-through, sykkel, tadpole, tandem, ten-speed, thirsakawr, tricycle, trike, twenty-niner, two-wheeler, uila vilivae, unadag dugui, VAE, velo, velocipede, velosiped, VTT, wheel, wisikilita, Xe đạp, xikanyakanya, xithuthuthu, zitensya, and zìxíngchē with numerous variations thereof. Labann lists thousands of tradenames, plus multiple models under each, a surplus of sobriquets.
Since internet postings only ever offer subsets, Labann merged brand lists from all over, without prejudice for marketshare or origin. Only requirement for inclusion was independent corroboration; some once cited didn’t appear to exist after investigation, or turned out to be retail outlets only. Given bike forums, book barrages, life experiences, and Google searches, it’s disappointing no one bothered to capture this entirely, an affront to millions of craftspersons and factory workers who provided the cleanest form of transportation over last 2 centuries. No wonder it took 5 years to compile this homage, another long list, along with discography, filmography, and terminology. There would be no bicycling culture without buyers and makers.
Labann’s List augments Bike&Chain’s appendices, covers 6,800 brands but not models, describes histories and products sold, and summarizes extent of what, when, where, who, but not ineffable why, which even Jean-Paul Sartre, see below, struggled with. It’s a solid first pass. Despite every effort to be comprehensive, entries may have been limited by bad business practices of makers too coy, disreputable, or timid to disclose own information. At end of list a bibliography provides several links to more extensive resources, none that demand cookie installation or personal information just to find simple facts, because historical data and marketing details loose in public domain should be freely accessible.
Spreadsheet bolds brands with greatest influence, though every entry, however obscure or pusillanimous, affected acceptance to some degree and served its purpose. Such a survey feels like meeting thousands of likeminded individuals, or not, when makers, often Chinese, don’t want to acknowledge minion or reveal country of origin. Unlike a database, this list can simply be searched or scrolled to find what you’re looking for. For collectors, the most sought out units are legendary, oldest and rarest, though a painting depicting a bicycle can accrue value quicker than bike itself.
Boundaries are lame excuses, but even encyclopedias overlook minutia outside their scope, so only included complete assemblages, components, supplies, and tools, not beverages, food, random stuff you might carry, scooters, skateboards, or unicycles, which are not bicycles or tricycles. If you abbreviate or encapsulate something enormous, fools think that’s all there is, yet too much information ages a list faster. Complexity and extent induce fear and stress. Facts set in stone may make historians comfy, but who can rely on anything said? Some current industry lists may delve deeper. Brand names are seldom repeated, even intentionally. Rarely is any cyclist interested in all equally, often content to limit involvement to only a few. At least own consolidates scores of other lists, may expand consciousness or open investigations, and was disseminated for free.
“When it comes to bicycles, I often find that truth is more of a stranger than fiction.”—Mike Sweatman, Disraeli Gears
Does where a bike is made matter less than how it’s made, or what it consists of, or who built it? A purely monetary approach might mean dealing with distributors who source from slavers overseas, thereby not supporting local workers, who then get laid off, so steal your bicycle to trade for necessities. Custom builds require your presence as if having a suit tailored. Some builders became legendary by figuring out how to make bikes go faster, last longer, and work better. Others deserve to be called out as charlatans, incompetents, or thieves. Internet scams are rampant, tempting low prices for equipment never delivered despite hefty downpayment.
Disclaimer: Details are from best input and latest intel, not guaranteed accurate, complete, or current. To reiterate, “Complete is a term used only by isolated idiots who ignore linguistics and locales.” You must include Africa and Asia, think America to New Zealand, track from today to yesteryear. No disrespect is intended by errors or exclusions, though you can see how premier brands might not want to be linked with budget or hobby offerings. “Discontinued” doesn’t mean never to be revived, nor still desirable and widely sold, particularly frames, often easily restored. NOS (New Old Stock) is a viable business among resellers serving restorers. Supply chain shortfalls of COVID pandemic pushed businesses to the brink and over. World wars likewise ended a number of brands. Yet lately there’s been a rush to profit off latest electrical and material tech.
Issues over identifying brand names abound. A brand might imply a reputation for quality not necessarily preserved after business was acquired, divested, or merged. Some actually build, i. e., Bianchi, versus procure, i. e., Gucci. Some are strictly OEM, furnish components or entire bicycles, but have no brand presence in markets, i. e., United Bicycle. Many only distribute locally, have no sales network, rely on websites or word-of-mouth. Can you even call one-offs “brands” at all? Bespoke, custom, handmade fabricators individually match bicycles to needs, but can easily be confused with distributors and local bike shops, who assemble units, collect input, go between, but never personally manufacture, per se. Purists and those who pedal for exercise might exclude electric assisted bikes altogether as motored rather than self propelled, thereby generating controversies on bikeways.
Brand names come from many sources. Could be an acronym, distributor fancy, function of bike material, maker surname, marketing nonsense, mythical character, name of some champion who had nothing to do with manufacture, place of origin, person who built, shop that sourced then sold, stolen from another brand, or whatnot. Almost 2 dozen were tagged Royal, obviously not built by monarchy. Some manufacturers slap dozens of different names on same product to see which one competes best for marketshare. As if shorthand, bicyclists usually refer to components by models and skip brands, i.e., Chorus, not Campagnolo, or Dura Ace, not Shimano. Consumers alternately and indiscriminately call assembled units by attached badge/decal or name of distributor/manufacturer. Consider this a quest to sort it all out.
What do birds, cats, frogs, pigs, or stingrays have to do with cycling? Bees, bicyclists, bike builders, and birds either flock together or fly solo. Collectively, they unintentionally accompany one another so often it disturbs when they don’t. Anyway, bicycles you see leaning beside or rolling by roadside will never be a single brand, but an amalgam of many. Without benefits of mass production, bespoke makers must charge twice as much, not such a bad thing since it spreads wealth. Although frames might last a lifetime, every other component will likely need replacement, some several times, such as brake shoes, cables, cassettes, chains, spokes, tires, tubes, and wheels.
Makers made famous by champion endorsements contrast with nobodies whom they’ve encouraged, squeegee wretches desperate to clear windshields separating drivers from bicyclists. Successful old time makers were often directly tied to rubber tire and steel tubing suppliers; thereby one stimulated sales for the other. Distributors and retailers might have house brands they promote alongside others for which they are licensed to assemble. Descriptions get really murky with company acquisitions, incessant change, joint ventures, leveraged buyouts, and successive mergers. Consolidations and takeovers ended some diehards resting on laurels and swindling investors. Industry has always had a convoluted history with drudgery and sweat taken for granted by consumers, insurers, owners, public, regulators, and tax revenuers. Nevertheless, you’ve got to acknowledge millions of burns, broken bones, bruises, busts, cuts, and scrapes it took to put 4 billion bikes on the road to date.
"To possess a bicycle is to be able first to look at it, then to touch it. But touching is revealed as being insufficient; what is necessary is to be able to get on the bicycle and take a ride. But this gratuitous ride is likewise insufficient; it would be necessary to use the bicycle to go on some errands. And this refers us to longer uses ... But these trips themselves disintegrate into a thousand appropriative behavior patterns, each one of which refers to others. Finally, as one could foresee, handing over a bank note is enough to make the bicycle belong to me, but my entire life is needed to realize this possession. In acquiring the object, I perceive that possession is an enterprise which death always renders still unachieved... In making use of my bicycle, I use it up—wear it out; that is, continuous appropriative creation is marked by a partial destruction. This wear can cause distress for strictly practical reasons, but in the majority of cases it brings a secret joy, almost like the joy of possession; this is because it is coming from us—we are consuming. It should be noted that the word “consume” holds the double meaning... To consume is to annihilate and it is to eat; it is to destroy by incorporating into oneself. If I ride on my bicycle, I can be annoyed at wearing out its tires because it is difficult to find others to replace them; but the image of enjoyment which my body invokes is that of a destructive appropriation, of a ‘creation-destruction.’ The bicycle gliding alone, carrying me, by its very movement, is created and made mine; but this creation is deeply imprinted on the object by the light, continued wear which is impressed on it and which is like the brand on the slave. The object is mine because it is I who have used it; the using up of what is mine is the reverse side of my life.“—Jean-Paul Sartre, L'Être et le néant [Being and Nothingness], 1943
World’s biggest current retailers, either through e-commerce websites or multiple stores (or both), include but are not limited to:
Amazon, number one retailer of everything, founded in 1994 to sell books, now a reliable conduit among consumers, importers, makers, and sellers
Bicycle Warehouse, since 1992, West Coast, USA
Bike Exchange, since 2007, 223 stores across USA
Chain Reaction Cycles, since 1984, Wiggle-CRC Group (subsidiary of Signa Sports), UK
Conte’s, since 1957, Baltimore, MD, USA
Decathlon, since 1976, Europe’s leading bicycle retailer
Dick’s Sporting Goods, since 1948, 850+ Stores, USA
Erik’s Bike Board, since 1980, Midwest, USA
Jenson USA, since 1996
Landry’s Bicycles, since 1922, Massachusetts, USA
Merlin Cycles, UK and USA, since 1993
Mike’s Bikes, since 1964, Marin, California, USA
Nashbar, since 1974; now owned by AMain Sports & Hobbies, Chico, CA, USA
Performance Bicycle, since 1981; once partnered with Nashbar, Chico, CA, USA
Planet Cyclery, Broomfield, CO, USA
REI Co-op, since 1938, 39 US states
Richardson Bike Mart, since 1962, several Texas locations, USA
Sigma Sports, since 1992, UK
Scheels, since 1902, 13 central US states
Trek Bicycle, since 1976, 100+ stores, USA
Wheel & Sprocket, since 1973, Midwest, USA
Lastly, must credit every author, blogger, correspondent, distributor, magazine editor, reporter, and whoever haphazardly and slowly doles out data, usually for a paycheck, sticks their smutty noses into this sweaty business, and summarizes with incomplete lists with some preposterous presumption of copyright ownership of information already in public domain. Bicycle culture and Tour de France was begun by sports magazine publisher Henri Desgrange way back in 1903. Participants tragicomically and transparently try to cement sales and create rivalries. Ignoring them altogether never ends well.
Saturday, October 19, 2024
Ubu Enchaîné
“‘Sir Ubu, the Russians attack.’ ‘Well, what do you want me to do? It wasn’t me who asked them to.’” Playwright scorcher Alfred Jarry, Ubu Roi, 1888
Waiting to see L’Infant Terrible, Ugliest American, Vilest Villain in chains for trying to annul constitution, destroy democracy, and violate laws. Decided who NOT to vote for 25 years ago.
Throw enough ketchup at walls and some will stick; requires no decisive planning whatever. Screeds and tirades against political candidates alienate everyone except like minded belligerents and partisans, and persuade nobody. You may legitimately question whether expressing a biased mindset compromises your own safety. Revenge is a real authoritarian threat. Russian novelists tossed complete manuscripts that criticized regime onto fire, because publishing them meant inviting a death sentence. The end is near; might as well rage on.
Choice before American voters in November of 2024 is progressive capitalism or reactionary fascism, forging forward under constitutional democracy or regressing into totalitarian tragedy.
The affluent seek brutal control since they have the most to lose. They believe fascism will keep them in positions of authority and secure their property, but history berates their abject stupidity. Nazis seized estates of wealthiest supporters, and sent them to concentration camps to die before they could exile abroad or seek redress. If you didn’t earn your wealth, you may fear disloyalty of everyone more experienced and somewhat smarter, when it’s irrational imbeciles you should mistrust. Their zero sum game stems in part from fear of deprivation and part from sadism for others' suffering. Sick sick sick planet Magathreea has a triple-D motto: deceive, divide, dominate. Trump’s candidacy makes a mockery of democracy, exactly how petty impotents Orban and Putin became dictators, by misinforming own people. And, as Pulitzer journalist Bob Woodward reports, politics today is an actual War with civilian casualties.
In America vs. Donald John Trump, the trial of which this 2024 election truly is, defense makes its case first, decades of excuses, failures, and prevarication, but final summation will always be prosecutor’s. Over 20% of expected 180 million turnout, 36 million jurors, so far requested early ballots, 65% of them Democrats; 7 million have already voted. Trump admitted 4 years ago he would run again just to avoid prison. If Harris defeats him, he’ll go down for all 91 indictments to date, though plenty more could follow, such as at least 8 documented violations of Logan Act and treason for revealing CIA assets who were consequentially killed. As a convicted felon and private citizen, Trump has no standing to discuss affairs of state with foreign dictators he admires; on bail in 4 jurisdictions, he’s not even allowed to travel outside country’s borders.
With 34 years in public service, 21 in elected offices as attorney general, US senator, and vice president, Kamala Harris is nation’s second most qualified presidential candidate in its history after Biden’s half century. Despite prior RNC spokesperson Alex Conant’s assertion,“We should not elect somebody as untested and inexperienced as Obama,” Trump followed as only candidate with zero military or political experience. His 3 years in office, when not away golfing for almost an entire year, still makes him the least.
For false promises and a fee, evil televangelist Paula White delivered her evangelical flock to this amoral oaf full of poisonous lust for presidential power. After given a chance to lead Christians, he screwed them repeatedly. He justified it saying,“People love to hate, so I’ll give them a target.” Since then, 4 known assassination attempts, possibly more unknown, by former followers have been thwarted by an expanded Secret Service squad generously granted by Biden administration.
GOP relies on numerous conservative think tanks creating policy for them, including American Enterprise Institute, Cato Institute, Christian Nationalists, and Heritage Foundation. All remorselessly favor affluence and privilege and toss challenged, middle class, and poor to the wolves. Takes a lot of talk to pull wool over majority’s eyes. Liberals also have a few, Center for American Progress, Progressive Policy Institute, and Roosevelt Institute, but mostly feel they don't need a hard sell, since their policies tend to be fair and inclusive rather than divisive and exclusive. Christian Nationalism is a disguise for fascist socialism, Nazis in smiley masks. Christ's only involved as a conceptual cudgel to beat pious saps into believing that a possessed demon who brags of breaking all 7 Deadly Sins without remorse redeems a convicted felon found guilty for obvious crimes and headed to jail.
Last lifelong New York crime lord Don the Con and his Art of the Deal sees every transaction as another chance to cheat and steal. Trump responds to any rebuke in his demented 4th grade, "I know you are but what am I," nadir of logic. He won’t stop because he gets airtime whenever he wants; fends off every accusation with a fictional narrative; is desperate to avoid prison; makes outrageous claims such as “Blacks love me; I’ve done more for them than anyone,” or “I’m the father of IVF,” or fatal January 6th insurrection was "A Day of Love," his personal Woodstock; owns a media company that spins whatever’s said about him into another gelt grift. Weaponized DOJ? (Garland‘s not even a BB gun.) Witch hunt? (No need to “trump up” charges with so many real crimes to prosecute.) He’s the one who wants to weaponize government sending military against opponents to quell free speech.
Who swallows myth of Trump’s business acumen? It’s a string of 6 bankruptcies and scores of convictions for statute violation and tax evasion. Why sell bibles, crypto currency, digital images, self medallions, ugly sneakers, and wait watches if he's so rich? Buyers underwrite the billion he owes in judgments, legal fees, and shortfall in campaign donations. Had he only put his inheritance into an index fund, he’d be worth triple his claimed $4 billion net worth. How do you fail to profit from a casino? Closer investigation would likely discover he exited that way to skip prosecution and stiff creditors after laundering money, offshoring assets, and stashing wealth.
What’s his attraction? Why aren't all who've abided decades of his blatant frauds, false claims, interminable rambles, sneaky cheats, and word salad sick to death of him? You’d think this creepy, unpopular, “weird-old” WWII relic would get the message and quit campaigning. Is it a combover, ramble, or weave? Every word from this convicted felon is a grievance, a lie, or a threat. His babble seduces to draw you in just before he murders, rapes, or screws you. He speaks to lonely hearts and losers, who yearn for morsels of attention, and worst among population, who seek validation for their malefaction. Sets the bar so low roaches can crawl over it. Those enthralled expect almost nothing of him, yet nit pick opponents over every detail. As his day of reckoning approaches, he has turned up extortion warnings and menace messaging to extremes, “Invasion, upheaval, and WWIII without me.” Framing arguments in absolutes is a symptom of his narcissistic personality disorder.
Trump appeared in about 500 rallies over 25 years of campaigning, boasting he had biggest audiences ever, more than Martin Luther King’s historic I Have a Dream speech, and presented live to more attendees than anyone in history, perhaps a million total, 0.3% of Americans. Not even close. Grateful Dead did 2,300 concerts over 30 years with biggest solo crowd of 107,019, and, of course, over 450,000 at Woodstock, way more than 5 million fans total. And they weren’t the most popular live music act in history, far short of Taylor Swift’s ticket sales during 604 shows spanning 20 years, 4.4 million on 60 dates of Eras Tour alone. He has to pay and plant phony firefighters, soldiers, and union members who were really RNC operatives at revival rallies and town hall meetings to fool onlookers and pad attendance.
Opposition’s drumbeats are immigration and inflation. After Obama handed Trump 6 years of job growth and less than 0.5% inflation, 24 months later it spiked at 3%, dipping only due to COVID, when nationwide economy stumbled with GDP down $1 trillion upon longest government shut down in history and 3 million lost jobs. Also during 2020, fentanyl deaths, gun sales, senseless murders, and 1,700 school shootings set unprecedented numbers, public debt jumped $8 trillion with nothing to show for it, and supply chains collapsed, reasons Trump wasn’t reelected and left with lowest presidential rating ever. Under Biden-Harris, inflation continued to climb to 3.7% before being doggedly beaten down to 2.4%, lower than Trump’s peak, much faster than inflation in all other industrial countries. Biden took Trump’s advice and Made America Great Again with best economy this century, biggest cuts in joblessness, huge improvements for neglected infrastructure, resurrection of manufacturing, and stock market indices at all time highs. US GDP grew by $2 trillion with nearly 5 million new jobs, and public debt was curbed by trillions. The Economist confirms, “The American economy has left other rich countries in the dust.” Yet current voters, having absorbed an aggregate of 21% rise in consumer costs since Bush's term, seem to have developed amnesia as to why it occurred. Biden-Harris didn't invent inflation, around for centuries, but Trump has many believing these facts of global life are either fake or someone else's fault. Neither did he take responsibility for his administration's mishandling of pandemic.
Former Secretary of Labor Robert Reich listed the 75 worst things Trump did in office, though arguably there were 750 more worth considering. These are not the acts of public servants, rather what crime syndicates and mob bosses do if they can get away with it. No previous American president ever needed to seek Supreme Court intervention, but House can still impeach justices and president for treason and violations of oaths of office, while Senate can convict and sentence them. He accuses current administration for inflation that his party keeps high for crisis perception and dissdent punishment.
Trump demonizes legal immigrants and radical left as bad genes, dangerous lunatics, enemy within, execrable vermin, general menace, and racial poison, and says they are to blame for greatness lost, when all that exactly describes MAGA assets and midnight agents he empowers to attack anyone who makes him look bad, break laws, and terrorize public. Capitol police, election workers, and families of opponents have been assaulted and injured. Decades of GOP influence begat congressional gridlock on important issues, loss of personal rights, transfer of $50 trillion of tax revenues to oligarchs, and weakness on world stage. Not Trump alone, all MAGA office holders are culpable - particularly Cruz, Graham, Greene, Johnson, Kennedy, McConnell, and Vance - therefore warrant recall and sanctions. Trump told them to vote down a bipartisan bill to address issue because perception of a migrant crisis serves as a campaign stump. This alleged illegal invasion accounts for less than 1% of population. Immigration during Obama’s 8 years was less than Trump’s 1 year spike in 2020; he opened border intentionally after all his tough talk of building a wall, really a permeable fence, purely as a political tactic. Since 2000, hispanic minority has indeed steadily doubled from 10% to 20%, with other ethnicities up by single digit rates; white majority shrank 15% to about 62% of overall population. The only citizens who object are white supremacists, while reasons this occurred are numerous and varied, though a healthy economy will always attract workers who want to contribute to country’s revenues, fill empty positions, and improve their lives. Citizens of a country are not enemies of themselves, they are the country itself.
When racists use the word "that" instead of "who" to describe people, it dehumanizes them. Trump saying "people 'that' are coming" are cannibals is among the many unhinged assertions that whipped his cult followers into an us versus them frenzy. Legal immigrants over last decade total about 21 million, about 7% of US population; among small undocumented subset no evidence suggests they are criminals or lunatics, an argument that goes back to boat people scare of 1975, propagated by, guess who, xenophobe Trump. Yes, an accumulated 45 million immigrants from all over now live in USA, the vast majority of whom are naturalized, including Trump's and Vance's wives. Immigrants already made America great, a fact that interferes with a neo-Nazi delusional dream to deport, enslave, exterminate, impoverish, and subjugate.
A consensus of hundreds of psychologists diagnoses Trump as a malignant narcissist, among the most severe of personality disorders: amoral, dishonest, lacking any empathy, and only in it for himself. Presidential historians rate his term as the nadir of American leadership: an eclipse of reason devoid of substance, fewest accomplishments, most divisive, the worst. He’d replace Pentagon generals with football coaches and NASCAR drivers. Directors, managers, and senior workforce of every federal agency would be fired and replaced with untrained loyalists, except agencies he'd eliminate altogether, like Department of Education and National Weather Service (because they laughed as his Sharpie redirect of a hurricane and wishes to nuke next one). NASA shows space based facts that nobody needs to know, so has to go. He wants to turn immigrants into unpaid prize fighters for entertainment. The list goes on.
Bigly Liar, Pance on fire, with interchangeable Pence or Vance, two Christo-fascists and Crypto-nudists, Trump did and would dump to install Donny Junior, an unlikable coke head and ticket drag who could never win even a token vote. As a matter of trust, how can you believe Trump? He bragged of waging the biggest misinformation campaign against Americans in history, got convicted of fraud, has run for office for 25 years under both major parties, and was fact checked to have told 35,000 lies over his 4 year term. If you take him at his word, he promises reprehensible and unconstitutional policies and virtual dictatorship aided by a his radical cult members. Freedom never means you can do anything you want, only what’s legal and responsible. Free speech excludes boldfaced lying, falsifying documents, fear mongering, inciting criminality, meanly pranking, outright perjuring, or testifying falsely.
While few want a dysfunctional democracy, only true deplorables who are cruelly delusional or deeply disturbed would replace it with totalitarian dictatorship. They'd accept corruption, insults, and negativity. GOP playbook has always been to bully, filibuster all legislation to create gridlock, gaslight; play race card, sex shame, then only discuss important issues to make unsupportable vague promises that won't go anywhere, or simply echo what's already been said by opponents that got a rise out of voters. Neocons created a series of recessions whenever they controlled congress, courts, or presidency. To squeeze grip on power, Nixon undermined journalism, Reagan busted unions, Bushes incited wars to funnel finances into warfare mills owned by cronies. Trump embezzled $8 trillion from treasury, and stuffed offshore accounts of oligarchs and self.
Build Back Better added and restored bike paths, highways, roads, and side streets long neglected by Republicans intent on impeding your mobility choices and impoverishing middle class. Speaking at Old Forge, Pennsylvania, Trump ridiculed Biden and Kerry, saying, “I’ll never be riding a bicycle,” defensively dispelling any worries over basic balance, bicyclists’ tan, or chronic infirmity, but not implausible injuries, “I’m not getting hurt riding a bicycle,” as if that did you a favor. So anti-bike is Old Bones Spurs who thereby dodged the draft, he initiated legislation to permit motorized uses of bike/pedestrian paths.
Trump’s a lazy slob in a sloppy suit and MAGA tie left too long, like a toddler who's guardians ought to know better. Ties stop at your waist, not crotch. He won’t disclose his college transcript, current health, or tax filings, probably hiding some truly damning disqualifiers. Furthermore, his henchmen raided doctor’s office to remove dismal records, though a heart stent merits concern, Irritable Bowel Syndrome is well smelt, and sociopathy confirmed by a consensus of certified psychiatrists. Nobody takes a cognitive test unless dementia is suspected. Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac; you have to be really impotent to want it as much as Trump. Defensive Don called Doctor Harris, “A bitch, crazy, garbage, and low IQ.” Contradicts what dropout Trump hates most about her: an accomplished, competent, sane, and successful prosecutor.
An aged joker who would be king hopes you’ll vote for his celebrity status and comic presence out of exhaustion, identification, or sympathy rather than your own best interests. He resonates with antisocial scum, billionaire coconspirators, ignorant losers, paid propagandists, and triggered paranoiacs. He’s worshipped by antisemites, convicts, cretins, crooks, cultists, dupes, homophobes, misogynists, numbskulls, racists, rapists, and xenophobes just like him. His Royal MAGA-sty is only fit for swine. They should ask themselves, "Do I think I could handle being president?" By any measure both he and they are unfit for any role in public service. Based on his past acts nearly every other demographic deems him a dire threat and despises him: America’s 65 million bicyclists; business leaders and corporate CEOs; ecologists and environmentalists; educated and empathetic crowd; entertainers who didn’t endorse him; European allies; first responders; former cabinet members, military generals, staffers, and vice president; free press and journalists; Gold Star families; government agencies and intelligence assets; healthcare community; Latino, Middle, North and South Americans; muslims and non-christians; patients with diabetes or other preexisting diseases; physically handicapped; people of color; professors and teachers; protestors; retired pensioners; recipients of Medicare, Social Security, or TANF/SNAP; soldiers and veterans; union rank and file; unwed women and unsupported mothers; wage earners across all industry sectors; and youth in schools. More than half of population should represent too many individuals to avenge, deport, or exterminate.
Criminals who’ve been investigated by justice department want him to succeed. Pledging loyalty is a scammer’s route to maximal loot without scrutiny. FCC and SEC violations flourished under Dubya Bush, enabling Fox and Newsmax nonstop propaganda and green lighting stock swindles with shareholders cheated out of trillions in dividends and equity value. The dead and disinterested eyes of Cruz, Greene, infotainment spokespeople, Murdoch’s murder of crows, Sean Hannity, Sebastian Gorka, Steve Bannon, and talking heads betray their bitter deceit and faithless fury. He’s never won a court case or popular election, just cheated his way in by electoral manipulation through Russian help and voter intimidation. They had to implement new rules, security, and surveillance of polling places because of him. Nobody he endorsed won in the 2022 midterms. Toxic, unmanly, unpopular: Trump's political poison personified.
The only promise his single term delivered was to funnel trillions of tax dollars to billionaires, including payoffs to foreign dictators to whom he owed billions, through 145 unilateral executive orders, having signed the least representative bills ever. “Infrastructure Week" was a cruel joke that waited 4 years for Biden to invoke. Biden decreased illegal immigration, deported over 1 million, while statistics show that 99% of crimes are caused by country’s own citizens with 95% of domestic crimes and terrorist acts directly attributable to radical right and Russian mob, to which Trump has strong ties. The main reason life is more expensive was his response to pandemic destroyed supply chains, while he encouraged Big Oil, Big Three, and other corporations run by same billionaires who gouge consumers and take record profits at public’s expense, done to cause fear and connive his reelection.
MAGA’s efforts to route dark money and stack Supreme Court are patently illegal and totally unconstitutional. No president ever required or sought absolute immunity for anything, especially not mass deportation, obnoxious sedition, and specious prosecution. You had to know this was coming after nobody from ENRON or Wall Street was indicted for cheating investors out of billions. Now one thousand billionaires have formed an oligarchy covertly ruling 330 million unaware Americans, who don’t want any page of 900 full of repressive policies they plan, including stripping constitutional, educational, entertainment, retirement, reproductive, and voting rights. There would be no e-commerce, internet encyclopedias, Truth Social, or X-tweets without access to information and bait of pornography. Trump’s no danger to deep state or shadow government, but surely an existential threat to ordinary citizens. His VP replacement called him "America’s Hitler", then figured that’s what America needs, a cruel dictator, so said, “Sieg heil!” and started goose stepping behind. Own generals call him “fascist to the core”. Dis-aster is not belittling a Fall flower, it’s what an authoritarian regime ushers in.
Americans used to expect candidates to be paragons of virtue. Logically and morally bankrupt, Trump owes a billion in court judgments against him, legal fees, and venue rentals he refused to pay. Nationwide nobody would post his bail. Paid off billions in loans from Putin and Saudis with secret documents, for which he’s also been indicted. His defense was to appoint judges who stalled cases until after election, then whine about being the most investigated individual since Alphonse Capone, and not without solid evidence that should terrify entire planet.
Trump humps flags because this rapist/stalker serial psycho "loves" to assault America, a country mired in a civil war of his making between MAGA “inhumans” and alleged liberal “unhumans” as Jack Posobiec feverishly reimagines them. The ultimate in Bronzed Aged megalomania, Don-old wants to be considered an ancient god able to do whatever he wants on a throne above AR-15 and Bullet Crown crowd. When he dies he wants everyone to die with him in a mass sacrifice. There’s no such thing as enlightened autocracies, as his supporters assume. Even if there were, dictators would actually have to be a quantum leap smarter than those being ruled, not just be convinced they are. Among American politicians, only Transportation Director Pete Buttigieg meets such criteria, and he isn’t running, yet.
Role of POTUS is chief public servant. Why then is he running? To exploit Biden’s revenue success to pillage more? Party politics no longer work like they once did, evenly divided voters, half Democrat and half Republican. Over 75% are now liberal or moderate. Trump only represents 15% on radical right, an extreme splinter mob that uses criminal tactics to hold onto power, so must somehow con 36% unaffiliated and 29% neither. Recipe for fascism: Consolidate power in a single dictator surrounded by an oligarchy; steal everything not nailed down (unlike $3.8 trillion Social Security trust fund, which they plan to take next); use wealth ($8 trillion during 45's term) to wage war against own people, cower them into submission; round up undesirables (disloyal), deport en masse, and murder as a final solution. Russia’s power play is to get morons to believe nonsense. Putin is desperate to discredit democracy, because his autocracy is failing. With hundreds of thousands of army age males fleeing homeland, and war on Ukraine going about as well as Afghanistan, Putin doesn't want his remaining subjects figuring out he's a failure and fraud. DOJ and FBI caught RT red handed paying social media stooges to sway USA’s national election for their favorite puppet, Ubu Trump. NATO must eventually align to neutralize threat after massive death and destruction.
For all the civic impoverishment and ruined lives Trump left in his half century wake, perhaps the worse is the cumulative stress it had on cardiovascular health and mental sanity, all the more reason to ride a bicycle for its mood boost. Duning-Kruger effect sees MAGA cultists using slurs as “low information” against prudent opponents not thoroughly brainwashed by nonstop agitprop. Trump’s responsible for the rise of “woke" as a pejorative, which is the opposite of his degeneracy. Jennifer Welch of I Had It Podcast calls out their “buzzword bullshit” of screaming trigger words instead of promoting unifying principles, of which MAGA has none.
“Woke" has become a joke meant only to gaslight and provoke. GOP hurls DEI around as if it's terrible. Diversity creates new markets. Money-grubbers sell equities, shares in systems everyone operates within. Inclusion? GOP is a minority party with only 25% voter affiliation; fact anyone abides their presence is a mystery given they are so eager to exclude. Difficult to relate to those for whom The Calculus only means a pebble in their sandal. The 7 Corporal Works of Mercy are to act charitably, bury the dead with dignity, feed the hungry, give drink to the thirsty, shelter homeless in entirety, visit convicts in a penitentiary, and visit those suffering from infirmity... woke to the core. Access to education and information enables, yet the cultured, educated, and literate still find it next to impossible to convince deplorables to act in everyone’s best interests and not vote for relentless recidivists.
A tenet of comedy is to portray absurdity. Trumpkins embrace atrocious, bizarre, criminal, diabolical, horrid, and monstrous. Not to hop on some bandwagon, MAGA isn't just “weird”, it's creepy, enraged, humorless, invasive, nefarious, perverted, and sadistic. “I’ll be your protector... women won’t have to worry about abortions.” GOP wants to be an army of elephants in your pajamas. Hard to believe holier-than-thou Christian Nationalists irrationally love their Cheeto Jesus, the very personification of The 7 Deadly Sins: Envy (better than Lincoln), gluttony (wolves down tons of MacDonalds and KFC), greed (embezzled trillions from public treasury), lust (cheated on wives with porn stars), pride (without me, catastrophe), sloth (golfed away half his term), and wrath (angry at everything, especially when economy outperforms his doom scenario). Higher Liar at end stage dementia cheers when stock market self corrects with profit sell-offs or slight hiccups that suit his red flag narrative. No one ever saw him actually open bible he sells; he’d probably burst into flames. If it isn't bad built, rage 'roid bimbo jerks like MTG, it's botox, collagen injected, face lifted, mascara man phonies butt kissing their grease painted, girdled pinched ex-POTUS, who, after running for office since 1999, has never won a popular ballot, and must feel justified in rigging elections.
Kindhearted kids expressing concern are not going to topple conservatives. You have to go armed with elephant rifles and rpg’s against their rampaging herd. These dopes are going to find their schemes backfire. They inadvertently gave Joe Biden complete immunity, while Kamala Harris fills Pence’s 2020 role. Even if Trump somehow gets reelected, Biden and Harris can negate electoral results, have Seal Team Six grab him before he escapes to his Venezuela estate, and sack SCOTUS Six, so Harris can restore balance to the courts. Dark Brandon, indeed. Con te partirò, Mr. Trump. He plays this song at rallies but probably doesn’t know what it means, “Time to say goodbye.” Next on his play list is YMCA; The Village People represented LGBTQ+, yet MAGA refuses to recognize them, vilifies them, and wants to purge them from society.
Fools who fall for false equivalencies, for example, “Don’t forgive student loans unless you first honor veterans,” can’t seem to understand that government handles thousands of diverse transactions every second. A trained army of agency employees make sure you hardly notice their steady service to which most feel entitled. They address and fund needs as constitution and laws provide. It’s never some Malthusian choice between national defense and social security, 2 separate buckets. But their competence is Trump’s first target, vowing to replace them all. AI servant Yuval Harari opined, “Ignorance by itself is not too dangerous. If you combine it with power, this is a toxic mix.” Facts are MAGA's kryptonite.
Silver lining? Trump exposed scale of greed, misogyny, racism, white supremacy, and xenophobia that still exists, and vicious 15% of population, criminals and mental defectives who belong in prison or on medication. As a textbook case, Trump also demonstrated how to identify antisocial personality and malignant narcissism to a degree seldom seen in leadership roles. Suppose greed appeals to someone who burnt through billions, knows desperation to regain status, though his embarrassment can't be compared to plight of 99% of Americans he made poorer. Millions of deaths later, Trump reveals how stupid policies can be a deadly threat to a vulnerable population. Points out the need to actually prosecute and duly process felons before they can do more harm to society.
Men I Trust, Lauren, single, self, 2016: “Rather chase a gentle breeze, set my thoughts by taller trees, ‘cause I can’t stay forever by my window. I need whispers that make me move, riding the country... Sync me within the outside world.”
Waiting to see L’Infant Terrible, Ugliest American, Vilest Villain in chains for trying to annul constitution, destroy democracy, and violate laws. Decided who NOT to vote for 25 years ago.
Throw enough ketchup at walls and some will stick; requires no decisive planning whatever. Screeds and tirades against political candidates alienate everyone except like minded belligerents and partisans, and persuade nobody. You may legitimately question whether expressing a biased mindset compromises your own safety. Revenge is a real authoritarian threat. Russian novelists tossed complete manuscripts that criticized regime onto fire, because publishing them meant inviting a death sentence. The end is near; might as well rage on.
Choice before American voters in November of 2024 is progressive capitalism or reactionary fascism, forging forward under constitutional democracy or regressing into totalitarian tragedy.
The affluent seek brutal control since they have the most to lose. They believe fascism will keep them in positions of authority and secure their property, but history berates their abject stupidity. Nazis seized estates of wealthiest supporters, and sent them to concentration camps to die before they could exile abroad or seek redress. If you didn’t earn your wealth, you may fear disloyalty of everyone more experienced and somewhat smarter, when it’s irrational imbeciles you should mistrust. Their zero sum game stems in part from fear of deprivation and part from sadism for others' suffering. Sick sick sick planet Magathreea has a triple-D motto: deceive, divide, dominate. Trump’s candidacy makes a mockery of democracy, exactly how petty impotents Orban and Putin became dictators, by misinforming own people. And, as Pulitzer journalist Bob Woodward reports, politics today is an actual War with civilian casualties.
In America vs. Donald John Trump, the trial of which this 2024 election truly is, defense makes its case first, decades of excuses, failures, and prevarication, but final summation will always be prosecutor’s. Over 20% of expected 180 million turnout, 36 million jurors, so far requested early ballots, 65% of them Democrats; 7 million have already voted. Trump admitted 4 years ago he would run again just to avoid prison. If Harris defeats him, he’ll go down for all 91 indictments to date, though plenty more could follow, such as at least 8 documented violations of Logan Act and treason for revealing CIA assets who were consequentially killed. As a convicted felon and private citizen, Trump has no standing to discuss affairs of state with foreign dictators he admires; on bail in 4 jurisdictions, he’s not even allowed to travel outside country’s borders.
With 34 years in public service, 21 in elected offices as attorney general, US senator, and vice president, Kamala Harris is nation’s second most qualified presidential candidate in its history after Biden’s half century. Despite prior RNC spokesperson Alex Conant’s assertion,“We should not elect somebody as untested and inexperienced as Obama,” Trump followed as only candidate with zero military or political experience. His 3 years in office, when not away golfing for almost an entire year, still makes him the least.
For false promises and a fee, evil televangelist Paula White delivered her evangelical flock to this amoral oaf full of poisonous lust for presidential power. After given a chance to lead Christians, he screwed them repeatedly. He justified it saying,“People love to hate, so I’ll give them a target.” Since then, 4 known assassination attempts, possibly more unknown, by former followers have been thwarted by an expanded Secret Service squad generously granted by Biden administration.
GOP relies on numerous conservative think tanks creating policy for them, including American Enterprise Institute, Cato Institute, Christian Nationalists, and Heritage Foundation. All remorselessly favor affluence and privilege and toss challenged, middle class, and poor to the wolves. Takes a lot of talk to pull wool over majority’s eyes. Liberals also have a few, Center for American Progress, Progressive Policy Institute, and Roosevelt Institute, but mostly feel they don't need a hard sell, since their policies tend to be fair and inclusive rather than divisive and exclusive. Christian Nationalism is a disguise for fascist socialism, Nazis in smiley masks. Christ's only involved as a conceptual cudgel to beat pious saps into believing that a possessed demon who brags of breaking all 7 Deadly Sins without remorse redeems a convicted felon found guilty for obvious crimes and headed to jail.
Last lifelong New York crime lord Don the Con and his Art of the Deal sees every transaction as another chance to cheat and steal. Trump responds to any rebuke in his demented 4th grade, "I know you are but what am I," nadir of logic. He won’t stop because he gets airtime whenever he wants; fends off every accusation with a fictional narrative; is desperate to avoid prison; makes outrageous claims such as “Blacks love me; I’ve done more for them than anyone,” or “I’m the father of IVF,” or fatal January 6th insurrection was "A Day of Love," his personal Woodstock; owns a media company that spins whatever’s said about him into another gelt grift. Weaponized DOJ? (Garland‘s not even a BB gun.) Witch hunt? (No need to “trump up” charges with so many real crimes to prosecute.) He’s the one who wants to weaponize government sending military against opponents to quell free speech.
Who swallows myth of Trump’s business acumen? It’s a string of 6 bankruptcies and scores of convictions for statute violation and tax evasion. Why sell bibles, crypto currency, digital images, self medallions, ugly sneakers, and wait watches if he's so rich? Buyers underwrite the billion he owes in judgments, legal fees, and shortfall in campaign donations. Had he only put his inheritance into an index fund, he’d be worth triple his claimed $4 billion net worth. How do you fail to profit from a casino? Closer investigation would likely discover he exited that way to skip prosecution and stiff creditors after laundering money, offshoring assets, and stashing wealth.
What’s his attraction? Why aren't all who've abided decades of his blatant frauds, false claims, interminable rambles, sneaky cheats, and word salad sick to death of him? You’d think this creepy, unpopular, “weird-old” WWII relic would get the message and quit campaigning. Is it a combover, ramble, or weave? Every word from this convicted felon is a grievance, a lie, or a threat. His babble seduces to draw you in just before he murders, rapes, or screws you. He speaks to lonely hearts and losers, who yearn for morsels of attention, and worst among population, who seek validation for their malefaction. Sets the bar so low roaches can crawl over it. Those enthralled expect almost nothing of him, yet nit pick opponents over every detail. As his day of reckoning approaches, he has turned up extortion warnings and menace messaging to extremes, “Invasion, upheaval, and WWIII without me.” Framing arguments in absolutes is a symptom of his narcissistic personality disorder.
Trump appeared in about 500 rallies over 25 years of campaigning, boasting he had biggest audiences ever, more than Martin Luther King’s historic I Have a Dream speech, and presented live to more attendees than anyone in history, perhaps a million total, 0.3% of Americans. Not even close. Grateful Dead did 2,300 concerts over 30 years with biggest solo crowd of 107,019, and, of course, over 450,000 at Woodstock, way more than 5 million fans total. And they weren’t the most popular live music act in history, far short of Taylor Swift’s ticket sales during 604 shows spanning 20 years, 4.4 million on 60 dates of Eras Tour alone. He has to pay and plant phony firefighters, soldiers, and union members who were really RNC operatives at revival rallies and town hall meetings to fool onlookers and pad attendance.
Opposition’s drumbeats are immigration and inflation. After Obama handed Trump 6 years of job growth and less than 0.5% inflation, 24 months later it spiked at 3%, dipping only due to COVID, when nationwide economy stumbled with GDP down $1 trillion upon longest government shut down in history and 3 million lost jobs. Also during 2020, fentanyl deaths, gun sales, senseless murders, and 1,700 school shootings set unprecedented numbers, public debt jumped $8 trillion with nothing to show for it, and supply chains collapsed, reasons Trump wasn’t reelected and left with lowest presidential rating ever. Under Biden-Harris, inflation continued to climb to 3.7% before being doggedly beaten down to 2.4%, lower than Trump’s peak, much faster than inflation in all other industrial countries. Biden took Trump’s advice and Made America Great Again with best economy this century, biggest cuts in joblessness, huge improvements for neglected infrastructure, resurrection of manufacturing, and stock market indices at all time highs. US GDP grew by $2 trillion with nearly 5 million new jobs, and public debt was curbed by trillions. The Economist confirms, “The American economy has left other rich countries in the dust.” Yet current voters, having absorbed an aggregate of 21% rise in consumer costs since Bush's term, seem to have developed amnesia as to why it occurred. Biden-Harris didn't invent inflation, around for centuries, but Trump has many believing these facts of global life are either fake or someone else's fault. Neither did he take responsibility for his administration's mishandling of pandemic.
Former Secretary of Labor Robert Reich listed the 75 worst things Trump did in office, though arguably there were 750 more worth considering. These are not the acts of public servants, rather what crime syndicates and mob bosses do if they can get away with it. No previous American president ever needed to seek Supreme Court intervention, but House can still impeach justices and president for treason and violations of oaths of office, while Senate can convict and sentence them. He accuses current administration for inflation that his party keeps high for crisis perception and dissdent punishment.
Trump demonizes legal immigrants and radical left as bad genes, dangerous lunatics, enemy within, execrable vermin, general menace, and racial poison, and says they are to blame for greatness lost, when all that exactly describes MAGA assets and midnight agents he empowers to attack anyone who makes him look bad, break laws, and terrorize public. Capitol police, election workers, and families of opponents have been assaulted and injured. Decades of GOP influence begat congressional gridlock on important issues, loss of personal rights, transfer of $50 trillion of tax revenues to oligarchs, and weakness on world stage. Not Trump alone, all MAGA office holders are culpable - particularly Cruz, Graham, Greene, Johnson, Kennedy, McConnell, and Vance - therefore warrant recall and sanctions. Trump told them to vote down a bipartisan bill to address issue because perception of a migrant crisis serves as a campaign stump. This alleged illegal invasion accounts for less than 1% of population. Immigration during Obama’s 8 years was less than Trump’s 1 year spike in 2020; he opened border intentionally after all his tough talk of building a wall, really a permeable fence, purely as a political tactic. Since 2000, hispanic minority has indeed steadily doubled from 10% to 20%, with other ethnicities up by single digit rates; white majority shrank 15% to about 62% of overall population. The only citizens who object are white supremacists, while reasons this occurred are numerous and varied, though a healthy economy will always attract workers who want to contribute to country’s revenues, fill empty positions, and improve their lives. Citizens of a country are not enemies of themselves, they are the country itself.
When racists use the word "that" instead of "who" to describe people, it dehumanizes them. Trump saying "people 'that' are coming" are cannibals is among the many unhinged assertions that whipped his cult followers into an us versus them frenzy. Legal immigrants over last decade total about 21 million, about 7% of US population; among small undocumented subset no evidence suggests they are criminals or lunatics, an argument that goes back to boat people scare of 1975, propagated by, guess who, xenophobe Trump. Yes, an accumulated 45 million immigrants from all over now live in USA, the vast majority of whom are naturalized, including Trump's and Vance's wives. Immigrants already made America great, a fact that interferes with a neo-Nazi delusional dream to deport, enslave, exterminate, impoverish, and subjugate.
A consensus of hundreds of psychologists diagnoses Trump as a malignant narcissist, among the most severe of personality disorders: amoral, dishonest, lacking any empathy, and only in it for himself. Presidential historians rate his term as the nadir of American leadership: an eclipse of reason devoid of substance, fewest accomplishments, most divisive, the worst. He’d replace Pentagon generals with football coaches and NASCAR drivers. Directors, managers, and senior workforce of every federal agency would be fired and replaced with untrained loyalists, except agencies he'd eliminate altogether, like Department of Education and National Weather Service (because they laughed as his Sharpie redirect of a hurricane and wishes to nuke next one). NASA shows space based facts that nobody needs to know, so has to go. He wants to turn immigrants into unpaid prize fighters for entertainment. The list goes on.
Bigly Liar, Pance on fire, with interchangeable Pence or Vance, two Christo-fascists and Crypto-nudists, Trump did and would dump to install Donny Junior, an unlikable coke head and ticket drag who could never win even a token vote. As a matter of trust, how can you believe Trump? He bragged of waging the biggest misinformation campaign against Americans in history, got convicted of fraud, has run for office for 25 years under both major parties, and was fact checked to have told 35,000 lies over his 4 year term. If you take him at his word, he promises reprehensible and unconstitutional policies and virtual dictatorship aided by a his radical cult members. Freedom never means you can do anything you want, only what’s legal and responsible. Free speech excludes boldfaced lying, falsifying documents, fear mongering, inciting criminality, meanly pranking, outright perjuring, or testifying falsely.
While few want a dysfunctional democracy, only true deplorables who are cruelly delusional or deeply disturbed would replace it with totalitarian dictatorship. They'd accept corruption, insults, and negativity. GOP playbook has always been to bully, filibuster all legislation to create gridlock, gaslight; play race card, sex shame, then only discuss important issues to make unsupportable vague promises that won't go anywhere, or simply echo what's already been said by opponents that got a rise out of voters. Neocons created a series of recessions whenever they controlled congress, courts, or presidency. To squeeze grip on power, Nixon undermined journalism, Reagan busted unions, Bushes incited wars to funnel finances into warfare mills owned by cronies. Trump embezzled $8 trillion from treasury, and stuffed offshore accounts of oligarchs and self.
Build Back Better added and restored bike paths, highways, roads, and side streets long neglected by Republicans intent on impeding your mobility choices and impoverishing middle class. Speaking at Old Forge, Pennsylvania, Trump ridiculed Biden and Kerry, saying, “I’ll never be riding a bicycle,” defensively dispelling any worries over basic balance, bicyclists’ tan, or chronic infirmity, but not implausible injuries, “I’m not getting hurt riding a bicycle,” as if that did you a favor. So anti-bike is Old Bones Spurs who thereby dodged the draft, he initiated legislation to permit motorized uses of bike/pedestrian paths.
Trump’s a lazy slob in a sloppy suit and MAGA tie left too long, like a toddler who's guardians ought to know better. Ties stop at your waist, not crotch. He won’t disclose his college transcript, current health, or tax filings, probably hiding some truly damning disqualifiers. Furthermore, his henchmen raided doctor’s office to remove dismal records, though a heart stent merits concern, Irritable Bowel Syndrome is well smelt, and sociopathy confirmed by a consensus of certified psychiatrists. Nobody takes a cognitive test unless dementia is suspected. Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac; you have to be really impotent to want it as much as Trump. Defensive Don called Doctor Harris, “A bitch, crazy, garbage, and low IQ.” Contradicts what dropout Trump hates most about her: an accomplished, competent, sane, and successful prosecutor.
An aged joker who would be king hopes you’ll vote for his celebrity status and comic presence out of exhaustion, identification, or sympathy rather than your own best interests. He resonates with antisocial scum, billionaire coconspirators, ignorant losers, paid propagandists, and triggered paranoiacs. He’s worshipped by antisemites, convicts, cretins, crooks, cultists, dupes, homophobes, misogynists, numbskulls, racists, rapists, and xenophobes just like him. His Royal MAGA-sty is only fit for swine. They should ask themselves, "Do I think I could handle being president?" By any measure both he and they are unfit for any role in public service. Based on his past acts nearly every other demographic deems him a dire threat and despises him: America’s 65 million bicyclists; business leaders and corporate CEOs; ecologists and environmentalists; educated and empathetic crowd; entertainers who didn’t endorse him; European allies; first responders; former cabinet members, military generals, staffers, and vice president; free press and journalists; Gold Star families; government agencies and intelligence assets; healthcare community; Latino, Middle, North and South Americans; muslims and non-christians; patients with diabetes or other preexisting diseases; physically handicapped; people of color; professors and teachers; protestors; retired pensioners; recipients of Medicare, Social Security, or TANF/SNAP; soldiers and veterans; union rank and file; unwed women and unsupported mothers; wage earners across all industry sectors; and youth in schools. More than half of population should represent too many individuals to avenge, deport, or exterminate.
Criminals who’ve been investigated by justice department want him to succeed. Pledging loyalty is a scammer’s route to maximal loot without scrutiny. FCC and SEC violations flourished under Dubya Bush, enabling Fox and Newsmax nonstop propaganda and green lighting stock swindles with shareholders cheated out of trillions in dividends and equity value. The dead and disinterested eyes of Cruz, Greene, infotainment spokespeople, Murdoch’s murder of crows, Sean Hannity, Sebastian Gorka, Steve Bannon, and talking heads betray their bitter deceit and faithless fury. He’s never won a court case or popular election, just cheated his way in by electoral manipulation through Russian help and voter intimidation. They had to implement new rules, security, and surveillance of polling places because of him. Nobody he endorsed won in the 2022 midterms. Toxic, unmanly, unpopular: Trump's political poison personified.
The only promise his single term delivered was to funnel trillions of tax dollars to billionaires, including payoffs to foreign dictators to whom he owed billions, through 145 unilateral executive orders, having signed the least representative bills ever. “Infrastructure Week" was a cruel joke that waited 4 years for Biden to invoke. Biden decreased illegal immigration, deported over 1 million, while statistics show that 99% of crimes are caused by country’s own citizens with 95% of domestic crimes and terrorist acts directly attributable to radical right and Russian mob, to which Trump has strong ties. The main reason life is more expensive was his response to pandemic destroyed supply chains, while he encouraged Big Oil, Big Three, and other corporations run by same billionaires who gouge consumers and take record profits at public’s expense, done to cause fear and connive his reelection.
MAGA’s efforts to route dark money and stack Supreme Court are patently illegal and totally unconstitutional. No president ever required or sought absolute immunity for anything, especially not mass deportation, obnoxious sedition, and specious prosecution. You had to know this was coming after nobody from ENRON or Wall Street was indicted for cheating investors out of billions. Now one thousand billionaires have formed an oligarchy covertly ruling 330 million unaware Americans, who don’t want any page of 900 full of repressive policies they plan, including stripping constitutional, educational, entertainment, retirement, reproductive, and voting rights. There would be no e-commerce, internet encyclopedias, Truth Social, or X-tweets without access to information and bait of pornography. Trump’s no danger to deep state or shadow government, but surely an existential threat to ordinary citizens. His VP replacement called him "America’s Hitler", then figured that’s what America needs, a cruel dictator, so said, “Sieg heil!” and started goose stepping behind. Own generals call him “fascist to the core”. Dis-aster is not belittling a Fall flower, it’s what an authoritarian regime ushers in.
Americans used to expect candidates to be paragons of virtue. Logically and morally bankrupt, Trump owes a billion in court judgments against him, legal fees, and venue rentals he refused to pay. Nationwide nobody would post his bail. Paid off billions in loans from Putin and Saudis with secret documents, for which he’s also been indicted. His defense was to appoint judges who stalled cases until after election, then whine about being the most investigated individual since Alphonse Capone, and not without solid evidence that should terrify entire planet.
Trump humps flags because this rapist/stalker serial psycho "loves" to assault America, a country mired in a civil war of his making between MAGA “inhumans” and alleged liberal “unhumans” as Jack Posobiec feverishly reimagines them. The ultimate in Bronzed Aged megalomania, Don-old wants to be considered an ancient god able to do whatever he wants on a throne above AR-15 and Bullet Crown crowd. When he dies he wants everyone to die with him in a mass sacrifice. There’s no such thing as enlightened autocracies, as his supporters assume. Even if there were, dictators would actually have to be a quantum leap smarter than those being ruled, not just be convinced they are. Among American politicians, only Transportation Director Pete Buttigieg meets such criteria, and he isn’t running, yet.
Role of POTUS is chief public servant. Why then is he running? To exploit Biden’s revenue success to pillage more? Party politics no longer work like they once did, evenly divided voters, half Democrat and half Republican. Over 75% are now liberal or moderate. Trump only represents 15% on radical right, an extreme splinter mob that uses criminal tactics to hold onto power, so must somehow con 36% unaffiliated and 29% neither. Recipe for fascism: Consolidate power in a single dictator surrounded by an oligarchy; steal everything not nailed down (unlike $3.8 trillion Social Security trust fund, which they plan to take next); use wealth ($8 trillion during 45's term) to wage war against own people, cower them into submission; round up undesirables (disloyal), deport en masse, and murder as a final solution. Russia’s power play is to get morons to believe nonsense. Putin is desperate to discredit democracy, because his autocracy is failing. With hundreds of thousands of army age males fleeing homeland, and war on Ukraine going about as well as Afghanistan, Putin doesn't want his remaining subjects figuring out he's a failure and fraud. DOJ and FBI caught RT red handed paying social media stooges to sway USA’s national election for their favorite puppet, Ubu Trump. NATO must eventually align to neutralize threat after massive death and destruction.
For all the civic impoverishment and ruined lives Trump left in his half century wake, perhaps the worse is the cumulative stress it had on cardiovascular health and mental sanity, all the more reason to ride a bicycle for its mood boost. Duning-Kruger effect sees MAGA cultists using slurs as “low information” against prudent opponents not thoroughly brainwashed by nonstop agitprop. Trump’s responsible for the rise of “woke" as a pejorative, which is the opposite of his degeneracy. Jennifer Welch of I Had It Podcast calls out their “buzzword bullshit” of screaming trigger words instead of promoting unifying principles, of which MAGA has none.
“Woke" has become a joke meant only to gaslight and provoke. GOP hurls DEI around as if it's terrible. Diversity creates new markets. Money-grubbers sell equities, shares in systems everyone operates within. Inclusion? GOP is a minority party with only 25% voter affiliation; fact anyone abides their presence is a mystery given they are so eager to exclude. Difficult to relate to those for whom The Calculus only means a pebble in their sandal. The 7 Corporal Works of Mercy are to act charitably, bury the dead with dignity, feed the hungry, give drink to the thirsty, shelter homeless in entirety, visit convicts in a penitentiary, and visit those suffering from infirmity... woke to the core. Access to education and information enables, yet the cultured, educated, and literate still find it next to impossible to convince deplorables to act in everyone’s best interests and not vote for relentless recidivists.
A tenet of comedy is to portray absurdity. Trumpkins embrace atrocious, bizarre, criminal, diabolical, horrid, and monstrous. Not to hop on some bandwagon, MAGA isn't just “weird”, it's creepy, enraged, humorless, invasive, nefarious, perverted, and sadistic. “I’ll be your protector... women won’t have to worry about abortions.” GOP wants to be an army of elephants in your pajamas. Hard to believe holier-than-thou Christian Nationalists irrationally love their Cheeto Jesus, the very personification of The 7 Deadly Sins: Envy (better than Lincoln), gluttony (wolves down tons of MacDonalds and KFC), greed (embezzled trillions from public treasury), lust (cheated on wives with porn stars), pride (without me, catastrophe), sloth (golfed away half his term), and wrath (angry at everything, especially when economy outperforms his doom scenario). Higher Liar at end stage dementia cheers when stock market self corrects with profit sell-offs or slight hiccups that suit his red flag narrative. No one ever saw him actually open bible he sells; he’d probably burst into flames. If it isn't bad built, rage 'roid bimbo jerks like MTG, it's botox, collagen injected, face lifted, mascara man phonies butt kissing their grease painted, girdled pinched ex-POTUS, who, after running for office since 1999, has never won a popular ballot, and must feel justified in rigging elections.
Kindhearted kids expressing concern are not going to topple conservatives. You have to go armed with elephant rifles and rpg’s against their rampaging herd. These dopes are going to find their schemes backfire. They inadvertently gave Joe Biden complete immunity, while Kamala Harris fills Pence’s 2020 role. Even if Trump somehow gets reelected, Biden and Harris can negate electoral results, have Seal Team Six grab him before he escapes to his Venezuela estate, and sack SCOTUS Six, so Harris can restore balance to the courts. Dark Brandon, indeed. Con te partirò, Mr. Trump. He plays this song at rallies but probably doesn’t know what it means, “Time to say goodbye.” Next on his play list is YMCA; The Village People represented LGBTQ+, yet MAGA refuses to recognize them, vilifies them, and wants to purge them from society.
Fools who fall for false equivalencies, for example, “Don’t forgive student loans unless you first honor veterans,” can’t seem to understand that government handles thousands of diverse transactions every second. A trained army of agency employees make sure you hardly notice their steady service to which most feel entitled. They address and fund needs as constitution and laws provide. It’s never some Malthusian choice between national defense and social security, 2 separate buckets. But their competence is Trump’s first target, vowing to replace them all. AI servant Yuval Harari opined, “Ignorance by itself is not too dangerous. If you combine it with power, this is a toxic mix.” Facts are MAGA's kryptonite.
Silver lining? Trump exposed scale of greed, misogyny, racism, white supremacy, and xenophobia that still exists, and vicious 15% of population, criminals and mental defectives who belong in prison or on medication. As a textbook case, Trump also demonstrated how to identify antisocial personality and malignant narcissism to a degree seldom seen in leadership roles. Suppose greed appeals to someone who burnt through billions, knows desperation to regain status, though his embarrassment can't be compared to plight of 99% of Americans he made poorer. Millions of deaths later, Trump reveals how stupid policies can be a deadly threat to a vulnerable population. Points out the need to actually prosecute and duly process felons before they can do more harm to society.
Men I Trust, Lauren, single, self, 2016: “Rather chase a gentle breeze, set my thoughts by taller trees, ‘cause I can’t stay forever by my window. I need whispers that make me move, riding the country... Sync me within the outside world.”
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