Brutish Exotain

Pondering similarities among chain rhyming words, noticed how In each of these cases things go or stay, much like populations do today:
Abstainers forego pleasures, not only during advent or lent.
Complainers waste their time and yours, since neither they nor you listen, only vent.
Containers have covers and sides and keep things from escaping.
Detainers arrest, hold or imprison others from going freely.
Entertainers rivet audiences through stimulations both brainy and feely.
Explainers hope to clarify topics and move listeners, but usually fail.
Infotainers advertise dicey products for sale, anger audiences by airtime squandering.
Maintainers avoid change and resist decrepitude.
Obtainers exploit trust to get fat on rich food and wealth accrued.
Restrainers are metal chains or paper edicts that deter your unwanted actions.
Retainers snare lawyers and others who agree to serve obtainers.
Trainers indoctrinate new hires to prevent workplace revolutions.

Language ought to have a term for anyone who turns citizens into refugees from countries they once defended, loved and supported. Exodus has become a dire international issue. No nation wants to welcome undesirables run off by despots and dictators, who have long realized that dislodging residents from their homes is the best way to keep them vulnerable and weak. Land owners can hypothetically exploit own resources, fend for themselves, grow food, and ignore government until taxed prohibitively. Brexiters abandoned European brethren. Coined the term “Exotainer” only to learn that it already exists for biodegradable beverage and food containers that can be composted, a veritable no-brainer, since nation’s landfills are nearly full, and you should agree that land could serve better uses than repositories of filth or sources of tax revenue, which ruin them irrevocably. So, considering Disdainer, Expeller, Villain and virulent Iniquity to be Loathed, can only picture some DEVIL as dreaded as Lovecraft’s Cthulhu or related monstrosities from Azathoth The Blind Idiot God to Y’golonac the Defiler full of perversions and sinister impulses, though none possess a strawberry combover or very small hands fidgeting on a nuclear trigger.

Humanity faces two gargantuan evils: Resource depletion and wealth disparity. Unless planet's 8 billion begin practicing alternative transportation, cooperative enterprise, social justice, thoughtful stewardship, zero carbon footprint, and zero population growth, each and every earthling is in for a rude awakening. Study those 6 phrases; they drip of new enterprises and potential profits. Yet leaders busy themselves with dismantling global treaties because they represent short term inconveniences and shift power from bullies and criminals to inventors and thinkers.

Waste management alone could be worth hundreds of billions, yesteryear’s landfills tomorrow’s mines, if diseases and toxins can be managed. Gasification could fuel electrical generation. Few realize that nationwide 90% of all electrical plants started since 1990 are gas fired. Fracking may be injurious to communities, but vast gas reserves exist in, for example, Siberia, while crude oil dwindles. So atmospheric carbon will abate as fossil fuels are exhausted, though renewable methane will remain a threat as long as humans rely on beef, chickens and pork as dietary mainstays. Beef is the worst among them, since flatulence cows emit and fuel for transport account for an estimated 20% of all greenhouse gases, not to mention saturated fats they contribute to an epidemic of cardiovascular diseases, still the heavy weight champion among killers claiming millions annually. How many cremations and vehicle corteges blacken skies in this endless holocaust? Smart approaches attack root causes, but undermine too many vested interests.

A battle is waged daily between humans and nature. Retailers install giant signs to attract patrons but instead collect small birds. They add nails and wires so they don't nest, but birds counter with lot litter, straw and twigs. Could provide somewhere else to nest, or rethink sign design, but thinking proactively takes intelligence. Deer lurk in tree lines. Any fauna bold enough to enter roadway dodges massive machines driven without regard for life. Death dealt lies within aptly named gore areas and gutters, simply another hazard for bicyclists to evade while worrying about likewise succumbing to relentless flow. Towns leave roadkill, except human corpses or traffic impediments, where it falls. You can watch its slow decay from day to day until months later it's gone away. Even though future costs might be enormous, whatever generates revenue today bypasses accountability and holds sway.

Why can’t so-called leaders cherish diversity that truly makes a country great? Uncaring capitalists unilaterally besiege those who actually care about others and do everything necessary for society’s survival, who only have to stop paying taxes and performing jobs to push out bosses, who endlessly concoct new scams beyond banks, politics and religions to dupe enough into thinking obedience preserves self and votes answer prayers.

What of one’s responsibly to provide worthwhile copy? As Time magazine asserts, Truth is not only dead, but would represent tyranny’s greatest threat if allowed to spread. Conservative fake news diced its last shred decades ago, goes on doing so. What if election and subsequent denouncement of Trump was simply a ploy to get voters to buy GOP agenda of greed? It's like bad cop, worse cop, big race to the bottom, not top. Great again? Happens when? Stockholm syndrome setting in? Did you see 10 Cloverfield Lane? Who can you trust when the unthinkable occurs?

Capitulating to human foibles and frailties yet inspiring self betterment has to be more effective than cudgeling compliance, enforcing draconian rules, and trying to make one solution fit all, what tyrants repeatedly try, unsuccessfully, with great loss of life. When you examine their motivations, it’s all about consolidating power and wealth. Basically clueless, they boomerang resentment and build barriers against mutual goals. Personal choices influenced by government policies divides and weakens nation. Some behaviors you must abide if you expect cooperation. Others are intolerable on a two-way street. Imagine having to foot the bill for alcohol and drug self abuse in mandatory insurance premiums and taxes. Medicare could handle all health care costs and oust insurance involvement. There’s no worse terrorism than threatening to eliminate affordable care, real estate ownership, social security, wages from jobs, and welfare. Conservative Congress vows to eliminate all of these hard earned entitlements, some paid over lifetimes. Their threats tell you they are the terrorists, can’t enslave without pushing anxiety buttons, don’t care about your wellbeing, and rather oppress than promote cooperation.

A century ago prohibition was as much an undeniable failure as drug interdiction is today. Seminal jazz artist Leon Bismarck “Bix" Beiderbecke was known for how he conducted his short tragic life and played his cornet according to his succinct philosophy, “Don’t shove, push politely,” Despite his bike related name, Bix never fooled with a bicycle pump, though Paul Whiteman Orchestra bandmate Wilbur Hall did a comedy bit that explored biological tones that a pump can make. Bix was too soused to stray from inventing a unique style based on physical limitation, then prematurely dying from his chosen addiction. Self anesthetizing and medicating was about all anyone had or has to dull pains and terrors of daily life. Now, aspects of health care that address, like psychiatric counseling, are what GOP wants to deny.

Well into an age of outrage with truth its main causality, society tries to get back in touch by watching contrived reality. Never more popular, some programs do catch essence of what happens. However, it can be argued that totally fictional films have done more to instruct how to conduct yourself in relationships, including ethics but particularly lovemaking. Technique among amateurs has greatly improved with internet porn to emulate. But hearing and seeing athletic adults engaged in coitus doesn't penetrate realities of attraction, abandonment, danger, disappointment, enslavement, frustration, recriminations, smell, sociopathy, taste and touch. Maybe metafiction seeks a midpoint between fact and fantasy. To get there you have to plumb depths of both. Appeals to self destructive acts only bolster profits for bankers, brokers, casino owners, drug dealers, and other parasites intent on absorbing everything people earned, invested in, and saved, and banishing losers to some internment camp out of guilt and sight. You’d think there would be laws and policies protecting citizens against this. But that’s exactly the kind of written effort no lawmaker wants to undertake.

Bled Duquesne

As a bike commuter, forced to follow the same streets day after day; they are not boringly familiar, since changes of season and research into history still present things to see. However, for decades made it a mission to visit new environs on weekend spins. Covered every back lane and road in a 75 mile radius, even drove to other states for loops up to 100 miles. Extraordinary only means you’ve never encountered it. Popularity only means it suits an unsophisticated throng. Recommendations don’t require your response.

Does paying attention buy endorsements, entertainment, or practical facts? Must say no, since that's not always the case. Would be nice if authors and critics could help readers divert a deluge of details, reject worthless drivel, select best and most relevant. No doubt, some try. Generalities just seem like truths, but never survive analysis. Mentors tell you what you want to hear. News anchors read scripts masking motives. Teachers stick to curricula. Writers mostly regurgitate tales deemed repeatable based on brainwashing. Your cell text is increasingly encrypted. Only barrier to B&C is a bit of poetry. In an enormous world where everything is somehow interconnected and everyone has personal agendas, you almost have to find your own way, ignore pundits, rely on own experiences, yet seek unique perspectives that free your mind and serve you in good stead.

Deplore lists that pump titles for payola; discredit selection bias that generates rest. Still feel obliged to point out bicycling books that occupy space and steal time. Life may be too short to explore endless imaginative nonsense stuffed between covers, mummified remnants of what once was vital, or overlong digressions from commonplace knowledge that informs sensible choices. Yet future historians might form entirely wrong impressions of what was happening now based on conservative broadcasts and consistent advertising that throttled the life out of truth so thoroughly practically nobody has any clue how to filter fabrications from facts. Compared to huge monthly bills for cable and connectivity, basic needs now that commerce and governance have placed everything online, where should such an annoyance rate on your grievance meter? Unless masses cherish logic and reason, and voters refuse to be duped by rhetoric, atrocities will ensue, cruelty resume, and mankind confront doom, something no one wants to hear about ever again.

Society steadily steers toward an oligarchy who would oppress everyone they can, not any destination you'd want to reach. In garage attending winter chores and reflecting upon life, sense how unchecked up-flow will eventually resemble monarchies and serfdoms. History shows that kings waged war among themselves and used subjects as pawns and proxies in battles. Next, robber barons subjugated industrial minions with long hours and small wages, and supplanted self professed birthrights. Duquesne Steel Plant, now a closed hulk in Iron City, Pittsburgh, PA, and National Tube works across the river, were once the epicenter of raw material for bicycles and “welfare capitalism” intended to block rise of labor unions. There Andrew Carnegie and J. P. Morgan battled for steel dominance and bled workers of life force by bobbing token benefits as bait. China, having stockpiled untold acre-feet of nation’s ferrous disposables, now produce most of the steel world needs, but at such an environmental cost people can hardly breathe and must buy oxygen peddled on street corners. It’s still exploitation only a century later in a different place under forced servitude. So much for the myth of communism delivering labor rights.

Teddy Roosevelt reviled monopolies and split up these monetary trusts. Roosevelt’s ancestors engaged in opium and slave trade, which positioned them among nation’s wealthiest families. Behind every billionaire lies a wake of broken promises and human ruin. Trump's casinos exploited gamblers and sex addicts. Whoever enthralls sinners invests profitably. Ethics have been slaughtered by politics. The loudest, most confident argument prevails, not the most commendable or decent. Somebody must pay for unearned privileges, usually anonymous, marginalized, middle class wage slaves, who never seem to learn from history that isolation weakens and organization strengthens.

Why can’t majority comprehend that unfair practices are reprehensible? It happens so often - kids disrespecting parents, motorists forcing others off road, public heaping abuse on civil servants, spouses forcing each other to do things they rather not - Republican, self serving, unconstitutional rules escape repeal. How does the elephant in room - GOP villainy - always go unnoticed? Free speech is a beginning, but it's far from freedom from tyranny and want. Answer lies in how distracted 75% of Americans are. If it’s not swilling beer and watching football, it’s being duped, doing chores, fighting desperation, meeting obligations, tweeting pointlessly, or working overtime. What ever happened to equality, fraternity and liberty for all men and women? Bled dry is why. You never have to care, or loyalty swear, simply track elsewhere by armchair book or real backpack.

Don Petterson, Old Man on a Bicycle: A Ride Across America and How to Realize a More Enjoyable Old Age (Outskirts Press, 2014, 236 pp.) visits this foreign service septuagenarian and New Hampshire native as he hits the road to San Francisco and records his impressions.

Jim Malusa, Into Thick Air: Biking to the Bellybutton of Six Continents (Counterpoint, 2008, 336 pp.): With nothing but sleeping bag and sundry supplies, this author/botanist bicycled solo to the lowest point on every continent but Antarctica, including Caspian Sea, Dead Sea, Death Valley, Djibouti in Horn of Africa, Lake Eyre outback, and Patagonia, and lived to log his observations on local culture and ecology.

Joe Boyd, White Bicycles (Serpent's Tail, 2007, 282 pp.) is both a book on Amazon and podcast from 2007. Title metaphor tells how flower power, exemplified by Amsterdam’s Provo who supplied free white bicycles to everyone and selfless brotherhood, morphed into selfish hedonism fueled by plentiful cocaine, which quickly supplanted marijuana and mind expanding hallucinogens, some say by government officals.

Boyd, remarkable for always being at the right place at right time, was an impresario and record producer for Electra label who got to know all the most notable counterculture acts during 60's and early '70's, including Jimi Hendrix and Tomorrow frontman Steve Howe, who later formed chartbuster group Yes. He notes how band Tomorrow's performance at London's UFO club after a street demonstration concluded club’s reign as an underground icon when news media they were protesting in retaliation denounced club as a drug hangout; this brought police heat and destroyed its outlaw appeal. Boyd complained that rock and roll was sanitized by silencing DJs, who had been delivering revolutionary messages.

Mike Howerton, The Ride of Your Life: What I Learned about God, Love, and Adventure by Teaching My Son to Ride a Bike (Baker Books, 2014, 194 pp.) compares how lessons used to master this particular skill can be applied to every challenge in life, and gives a video synopsis on Youtube. Readers find Howerton’s homilies absolutely credible and stirringly inspirational. Nothing new, am reminded of Baptist Pastor Harold Habecker’s Modern Parable of Bicycling podcast (2008), which was mentioned in B&C at the time. Some see spirituality in every act; some pray a painful ride will soon end, or they’ll make it to wherever they're going.

S. Ehmann, R. Klanten editors, Velo—2nd Gear: Bicycle Culture and Style (Gestalten, 2013, 256 pp.): “I bike, therefore I am.” Coffee table book proposes with photographic evidence that choices flag attitudes - certain bikes peg owners into particular demographic groups - and submits for your consideration coveted and unusual bicycles and those who ride them.

Wheeler’s Disciples, Epic Bike Rides of the World (Lonely Planet, 2016, 320 pp.): Crack team of travel writers describing 200 once-in-a-lifetime spins in far flung corners. Maureen and Tony Wheeler founded Lonely Planet when they composed a travelog following an impecunious drive from London, England to Sydney, Australia. It became an empire with broadcast series Lonely Planet and excellence award winning spinoff Globe Trekker entering its 19th season.

Dylan Thomas, Me and My Bike (McGraw-Hill, 1965, 53 pp.), illustrated by Leonora Box, is the famous poet’s unfinished screenplay. His stanza, “Do not go gentle into that good night, Old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage against the dying of the light,” has been cited wrongly and misinterpreted for decades. It’s about his dying father, who’s going blind. Such is the nature of words floating dissociated from context, taken to mean whatever by whoever stumbles across them. Freedom Medal recipient and Nobel Laureate songwriter Bob Dylan (born Robert Allen Zimmerman) adopted his name in homage to their mutual conflict with those to whom they spoke; occurred around 1959 when Bob gave up interest in rock-n-roll for more serious folk music. Both were originals not easily accepted by mainstream Americans.

The web features all sorts of poetry devoted to bicycling’s joys and sorrows.

Migrant Detain

As cortège passes to winter’s funeral, calculating next opportunity to commute to work by bike. Dawn already breaks so early, could actually complete entire 2-hour round trip in a blend of day and twilight. But bikeways blanketed by a half foot of snow and road shoulders packed high by plows still prohibit. Slabs of unforgiving ice exacerbate unacceptable motorist risks to bicyclists, who seem restricted this time of year to neighborhood mountain biking or some Sunday morning road outing, maybe. Meanwhile ponder how rise of polarized politics and populace rudeness will impede pedaling in a blue state.

After weeks out of saddle, inner dialogue is bound to deteriorate while muscle mass reverts to flab and gas. Collapse and decay preempt hopeful dreams until leaf buds form and pussy willows swell. Rich fear losing everything, so enact draconian laws in vain attempts at protecting. Thereby, they alienate those who'll do the fighting necessary to preserve their privileges. So, who then is your enemy? How much does your way of life align with theirs? Those who have the most to lose will always be planet’s biggest climate denialists. If you own a casino hotel on the Jersey Shore, global warming becomes too scary a threat to consider real despite documented scientific facts.

Others might be tempted to anoint Trump the “New Dealer", a knee-jerk handle given his joker name. FDR deserved this honor for social programs that dragged nation from depression resulting from decades of robber baron rule, just in time to fight off Axis aggression. Trump already labeled himself "The Fixer", as if some ace handyman with ass crack and tool belt under Lady Liberty's kitchen sink. The only fixing he's ever done is rigging slot machines and table games in favor of his house; even then he's failed to profit and left devastation of bankruptcies and layoffs for others to clean up.

Danger, Will Robinson! Trump may be an arm waving robot, who speaks in a monotone, as if no complexity of emotion affects his bluster-and-deny programming. A sincere, tragicomic mindset is easily punked. Party conservatives already expressed concern he’ll act like a tyrant and be provoked into another costly war. Impatience never wants to do things traditionally, live in White House, mend fences, or seek compromise. Announcing him by playing Hail to the Chief is out; he never served in military. But any dime store composer could concoct some pompous march to replace. The only thing about him upon which nation can rely is that he will enrich the wealthy at the expense of lower classes, just as he's always done for himself.

With indignant bravado and popped corn rants, he’s announced plans to cure “inherited mess”, but through the same old strategies that never remedied anything, in fact, spawned problems to begin with. Why don't tax breaks stimulate economic growth? Every time congress approved, all they did is grant windfalls to millionaires, silenced wage earners, and skipped altogether the poor, who pay little or no taxes. When they gave struggling families a few hundred dollars it went right into paying interest on loans, so fattened lenders. Dismantling affordable care merely transfers more money into deepest pockets. With recurrence of such token scams, wealth disparity, root cause for most wrongs, hasn’t decreased in 4 decades.

Reaganomics and savings schemes like 401k and IRA turned bankers and CEOs into powerful enemies. Record profits did not translate into job growth. Trickle down has not only failed, but increased public debt to $20 trillion; only what you owe has grown. Since banks are required for daily transactions and companies as providers of basic necessities, government ought to intensify regulatory oversight, not relax. Instead they leave it to largely ignored and typically underfunded consumer watchdogs and nonprofit informants. Congress should indict greed and recover pilferage from national treasury, but many members were complicit, particularly your typical conservative phony. Paying taxes going forward rewards their incompetence and theft. Citizens should expect more from governance or recall representatives.

As previously discussed, politics is a sanctuary for malignant sociopaths, who could never hold any responsible position that requires intelligence, skill, stamina and tact. Tried to advise him that being president wouldn’t fulfill his lust for power. Senate runs nation. All decisions are supposed to pass through filters of anti-discriminatory logic, 4 freedoms, and US constitution. Seems lately Congress has dispensed with all that, instead acted in self interest. A hallmark of emotional adulthood is taking neither blame nor credit for outcomes, because many hands achieve results and fulfill promises. Not at all entertaining, he’s downright frightening. Proves that chief executives ought to pass civics tests, health exams, and personality screens before being allowed to run. However, tempests with thunder and trumpets terrify pets and sheeple, not stalwart people.

Trump’s election represented nation’s repudiation of conservatives and liberals, Democrats and Republicans, and seated representatives, none of whom has done anything in the best interest of constituents in decades. But did sending this message backfire? Set up a fast track to fascism. First he negates careful plans and diplomatic solutions. Xenophobic paranoia spread by personality disorders sorts everyone newly arriving or passing through into criminals or terrorists. Long time green card holders who hold responsible jobs have been detained after visiting families in Moslem countries. Gestapo immediately attacked gypsies and other migrants, because they could slip their grasp and thumb their noses at freakish control fetishes. It’s not doing wonders for tourism, the very industry from which his billions were derived.

Nature abhors and abuses uniformity, white supremacy, yokels with local pleonexia, and zealots aimed at domination. Diversity is a survival mechanism for the human species. Lots of cultures coexisting creates lots of job opportunities. City dwellers understand, so didn't vote for Trump. Foreign nationals do represent problems, for example, arriving ill equipped so requiring welfare, sending earnings back to homeland, taking jobs from citizens, and whatnot. These merely mean enforcing existing laws and handling cases on an individual basis, something citizens expect some government agency to do after paying trillions in taxes and which has always been handled through American ingenuity. The best and brightest doing battle retreat to their corners for a time out trying to sort it all out. Threats of reprisal only handcuff and imprison them ideologically. In world’s most competent, richest, and smartest country, succinctly state what really vexes, and solutions will undoubtedly come forth from those who actually do everything. Leaders never resolve anything, residents do.

Decay Sustain

As always, had to release another year of musical attacks. Any list trailing previously mentioned 2016 song La Bicicleta by Shakira has to exhibit matching bump and grind, so don’t disappoint. Endless sex and gets exhausting, not to mention the stench. Highlights? Bizarre retro theme from Song a Day, and the surprising raw talent of duo called Bicycle, not to be confused with same named 90's pop band.

Because only surface sells, artists who don't groom or show low appeal at start often languish in gloom. Likewise, authors so despise marketing selves they'll write for free or stifle their voice rather than prostitute talents. Their drive to secure fame steadily relents after being repeatedly fingered with derision and sniggers. Most read nothing anymore but headlines and twitters. You can shut up altogether or stay your course, but unless you produce daily your abilities wither. Either way you'll be maligned and misinterpreted as everyone paints their own intentions into your delineations by number. Perfectly lay it all out, whatever you say will get obscured under layers of graffiti as if newsprint facts beneath an uncouth Basquiat outburst (shown, The Bicycle Man, 1984). Consider yourself lucky if you find some soul to travel alongside at least part of your way, because earthbound everything, relationships especially, are subject to decay.

Albeezy (Albert Gordon), Bicycle [Honduran hip hop], single, self, 2016

Amir Hedayah, Meena's Bicycle [orch.], Oticons Faculty Soundtrack Media, Recording Intl, 2015

Bicycle, The Way You Hurt Me, Bicycle [no specific bike lyrics, but certainly signifies], Ted M. Clements, 2016

Bicycle, Fallen, Bicycle [no specific bike lyrics], Ted M. Clements, 2016

Breathing, Magic Bicycle, 2014 Breathing Mix Tape, self, 2015

Chris Berry & The Bayaka of Yandoumbe, Bicycle [African folk], Oka!, Oka Prod., 2011

Consortium of Genius, Suite from Bikeman Begins, The FuMP (Funny Music Project), Vol. 28, Fidim Interactive, 2011

Insane Ian, Spaghetti Bicycle, The FuMP, Vol. 57, Fidim Interactive, 2016

The Laurie Berkner Band, Bicycle [juvenile], Superhero, Two Tomatoes Records, 2016

Lex Dumitru, Omega Rose, Omega Rose [soundtrack], self, 2016

Mammoth Life, Bicycle Rider, The Singles: 2006 to 2016, Nicholas Goss & Elizabeth Mead, 2016

Parks, Squares and Alleys, Bicycle, Against Illusions and Reality, self, 2015

Rob Cantor, Old Bike, Not a Trampoline, self, 2014

Selva, The Public Bicycle [French], Segell Microscopi 2014-2015, Microscopi, 2015

Song a Day, G&O Bike Love Theme Song, Spring, 2016, Jonathan Mann, 2016

Stephen Advance & Juan Davor, Hoffman’s Bike [glitch beats], Minimal in 2016, Flat Belly Ltd, 2016

The Trip it is, French Girl Sets off on Fifties Bicycle, Ten Thousand Things, Trip, 2016

Twilight Sleep, Bicycle [alternative], Twilight Sleep, self, 2004

Wallfisch, Benjamin, Bicycle [instr.], A Cure for Wellness [soundtrack], New Regency Music, 2017

“Well, I'm so tired of crying, but I'm out on the road again… You know the first time I traveled out in the rain and snow, I didn't have no payroll, not even no place to go… Don’t you cry no more, ’cause it's soon one morning down the road I'm going… But I ain't going down that long old lonesome road all by myself… I can't carry you, baby. Gonna carry somebody else.” Canned Heat, On The Road Again, 1969

Days that Remain

A month ago commuted by bike on year’s shortest day, not even 9 hours of sunlight locally. Arrived for a short shift humiliatingly late and hypothermic despite layering, including neoprene booties, but left for holidays early enough to avoid desperate, did-not-expect-a-bicyclist, distracted, drowsy or drunk drivers, enjoy a sunlit return without freezing, and freakishly feeling a funky urge to relay these details with anyone seeming to give a ficus. Every winter ride becomes a special memory, or, as Michael Wagner asserts, “Sometimes victory counts just by getting out.” Unfortunately, whatever personal info you reveal may be used against you by some lout. Yet how can anyone find satisfaction, survive, thrive, or trade without communicating something informative or intimate? No rewards arrive unless you assume risks.

Demigods dictate, ”Good authoring cannot be achieved in a vacuum.” Well, duh, there wouldn’t be anybody to tell or anything to discuss. As social animals, humans interact upon instinct alone. An author who validates bad behavior will find favor and may savor all that can be done by a savior. Gloomy seekers of truth get bored, gored by critics, and ignored by readers. Consider books by philosophers who built proverbial houses of cards on then current thinking, dropped dead, and later had historians condemn their bona fide insights as unreliable bunk based on sea changes original text caused. Nietzsche got nailed to a cross after Hitler named him as an influence. Unfair to condemn monumental contributions, but unstoppable is the momentum to topple arbitrary conventions and entrenched institutions. Out with the old, but what of the new? Not necessarily gold or improved replacment.

Dog chasing or snake eating its own tail, spinning carousel out of control, or stupendous delusions upon which all religions and sciences are based? No metaphors mandatory, stumbling towards eternity will always be a consistent thread in mankind’s history. In first of two versions, things reliably work as long as gods are repeatedly placated by sacrificed virgins. In other model, principles are inviolable as long as chance isn't introduced at origins. Must you embrace theories after applying logic to exploiting examinations? Every false dictum exaggerates predictions and justifies misconduct.

In reality, crap inexplicably happens, dogs and locusts have their day and purpose, luck prevails, most lose, and winners die sooner than their tactics were worth. Order entwines pandemonium. When you expect things to work well they perversely won’t. Ready writers no longer pocket a flip book and 2 pens; they take out smart phones and text themselves for easy edit/input. But paper and pen still back up dead batteries and dropped connectivity, which happens more often than technologists admit. Embrace chaos, because life only gambles upon unlikely scenarios where spasmodic snuggles punctuate survival struggles. Uncertainty threatens. It's your mission to sort what's routinely repeatable from what's totally unreliable. Yet they stage contests precisely to highlight whoever emerges victorious; spectators appreciate most those games that go down to the wire, lost or won on a single instance.

If mankind expects to survive as a species, barriers must be broken, coalitions formed, and isolation overcome. Societies must allow all members to pursue goals, and permit least members to play roles. Requires incessant communication, yet universal communion is impossible, and any movement toward would split into factions at each other’s throats. Metaphors hinder human communion. However, how very like a garden is a blog? To present a crisp salad of ideas and opinions you have to weed out pointless drivel. You must attend daily, at least weekly, not just monthly - lest blog get overtaken by pests - cultivate growth, deadhead what's done, feed with plenty of manure, and sprinkle every few days to maintain growth. Data net resembles roadnet, since each traveler carries an important pack of knowledge and skill in a flesh sack encrypted by confusion, need and will.

Mostly for money, this wizard of a lizard dropped a blizzard of words, over 30,000,000 in 100,000 printed pages, across 6 decades. Dumped it all into a sea of indifference only to drown or float bloated and wrinkled. Metaphors can be labored recreation, but they seldom explain anything better than straightforward simplicity. Intended to rethink what was encountered and remembered for over half a century. Instead, it became a mission to explore reality, a topic defined by its enormity. Reality amazes, requires no embellishment, and stands confidently. Those who find it boring just don't look carefully or take it for granted. Had several tools, but needed more bodies, because you can't meet such a goal alone. Hoped to enlist readers, who failed to report. Therefore, aspiration succeeded, but collaboration failed.

Those in history who've had the hugest influence orated to listeners with issues but never wrote down a single word. Doesn't mean they never existed, but does raise suspicions. Ironically, Labann is a pseudonym, so stood in, like Shakespeare, for some individual or group who didn't want to be identified and persecuted by bullies or despots. Some say nothing. Majority respects silence, though menacing assassins shut up, sneak up, and take up tasks seriously, so trust must never be recklessly bestowed. Yackers infrequently say anything meaningful, instead alienate everyone with whom they come in contact, yet may inadvertently disclose details worth knowing. Oracles, prophets and sages said little but suggested immense changes that privileged powers suppress as soon as sprung. Yet saying is not writing. Even when broadcast or recorded, statements can be and often are later denied; testimony can be twisted. Writing equals evidence in court; somehow people connect validity with the effort writers took to get what happened or was imagined into print, although publishers may not corroborate facts and reasons why are typically fabricated.

Adam Conover quotes Peter Norton and ruins your bliss by debunking myths upon which they are founded. Sure, it's done humorously and randomly, meant only to con and confuse audiences; he doesn't obsessively and systematically deprogram as does yours truly, but surely it's a credible start to losing delusions and thinking pragmatically. Craving and doubt precede enlightenment; thereafter, both are shed. Don't get fooled and used. Do honor sentiments expressed at Berkeley food company Annie’s; absolutely, love Mother Earth, so ride a bike to work whenever she doesn't try to blast, drown, freeze, pelt with graupel, hail, or stinging raindrops those she didn’t design to handle yet imposes upon anyway. Plod on resolutely in dark, fog, gloom, mist, but preferably shine. A couple of Organic Chewy Granola Bars fits nicely in a jersey pocket and rejuvenates you when bonked. So reaching out to bicycling community isn't such business buzzkill as most companies believe.

“Is”, always third person single present, sounds several echoes: "consists of", "equals", "exists", and, lately, "Islamic State". Except for use as “exists”, it justifies illogical worsts, lists unrelated aspects, and suggests A equals equally dissimilar B. Metaphors rely on "is" to pretend to explain the inexplicable in terms of the commonplace; at least similes possess factual accuracy and good sense to include “as” or “like”. Poet Wallace Stevens had that doleful line, “Let be be the finale of seem,” to call death what it is, an indelicate termination of all that matters, life itself.

A theocracy doesn’t care who meets eternal justice as long as some insane cleric’s endless lust for money and power are continuously sated. Responsible folks fight through desperate times by denying self and saving for future and heirs. Nevertheless, majority are deep in debt. Windfalls don't last, get spent. The enemy is anyone who has so much stockpiled they don't know what it's for. Money and talent are tools with which you can create opportunities for friends and self. Throw a party at least. One measure of desperation is assessing what you'd save in a disaster. If objects come to mind before family or neighbors, you are a sad recipient of human genes. Won't you strive to keep your species alive? Only how you act and what you do, not what you say and think, signify. Days that remain for mankind depend upon it.

Laid Américaine

So ends an especially ugly election with a verdict laid down by the subpar mentality of deplorables and dunces. America has again been delivered to white prejudiced patriarchy. Arise, you angry, crude, ugly American men, if you can from your beer stained, chip littered couch. At last, your time has come again, as if you ever let go of it at all. Get out of the way, believers in the American dream, homeless, immigrants, jobless, liberals, people of color, residents in blue states who, despite their allegiance, can expect retaliation from conservative cadre, politically correct sensitives, rainbow coalition, sick, weak, and worst of all women. Retreat and strategize based on age-old papal pap, forever, "Weather the storm.” Hope you’ve put aside enough to cover at least 4 years worth of expenses while you struggle to reverse this profound setback.

Pope Francis, although a self appointed spokesman for the unfairly treated 99%, couldn’t support a woman atop planet’s richest country, though he didn't forbid yet she did represent society’s largest downtrodden segment, over 50% of population. Sexism was an implicit undercurrent: Better a male with no civic experience whatever in office than a female with a lifetime of service who lived for 8 years in the White House. Only idiots need to believe that any idiot can lead. Such an example of matriarchy might topple Catholic tower of phallic power. Trump owes a debt to their swollen presence; Hillary lost by getting shrill and pointing out their influential ill. Control of your assets and soul are where politics and religion convene in an unholy matrimony. Republican senate skillfully used your middle class resentment of having to carry all of the burden against you after ensuring it was so. So raped, you’ve reelected them? Elevating a billionaire suggests numbskulls prefer monarchy and serfdom. Democracy demands rational thinking, something in short supply, and rigorous effort, something few willingly expend.

Why do nonsensical candidates squeeze country through wringer every 4th year? Because they can funded by your donations and taxes, and whoever deserves job wouldn't collect enough votes. Forget fairness of meritocracy. Those eager to occupy oval office, with no corner from which an ambush can come, aired nation’s dirty laundry, drew attention to themselves, and refocused it away from issues that mattered. Every day America went from stalwart power to terrible condition on verge of collapse. Imagine how poorly this must be met by allies, and how significantly it emboldens enemies. They totally trashed office in the process. Far too much attention was paid to presidential circus, which changed nothing, though too many conservatives got into or stayed in office by riding coat tails. Remember, Republicans dominating Congress were responsible for last 16 lackluster years, despite relentless propaganda to the contrary by Fox News and talk radio shifting blame onto victims, the middle class and poor. Repeated lies lay bare luxuries too worshiped to lose.

While Hillary won popular vote, The Don carried electoral, which means he duped enough districts by tapping into fear, ignorance and pride. Country bumpkins bought his bogus slogans. Barnum, who said, "A sucker is born every minute," never had so loyal a proponent. Hillary carried urban knowledge base, who consistently provide innovation for job generation. Don awoke isolated farmers and know-nothing yokels. Klu Klux Klan boasted on how they intervened for him. National Socialists, organized crime, and white supremacists gloated. Foreign leaders awoke in disbelief and horror. #RIPUSA trended in social media worldwide, while violent protests spontaneously broke out nationwide. Vote may well have been rigged, as Trump contested, but by Russian hackers representing just about the only country that welcomed results. France, stunned, wonders what will become of global climate action, since The Don calls it a “hoax to weaken America”, which only manages perception of its pollution better than China while cramming landfills, emptying fisheries, and spilling toxins.

What does this election mean to bicyclists? Beware the crass grasp of capitalist greed bound to proceed from examples set. Conservatives hate any alternative to their coal and petroleum burning agenda, especially bicycling. They foster gun sales to children, who Labann has seen on several occasions shooting indiscriminately toward bucolic roads you might be riding along. Since WWII they’ve been trying to drive bicyclists off roads altogether. The last Republican president, the dumbest and most divisive ever, curtailed all spending aimed at improving bicyclist and pedestrian access according to laws that mandate; he bragged about rendering these laws unenforceable without funding, although bicyclists could have brought a class action suit bound to be struck down by Supreme Court.

You don’t have to be happy and shut up about this outcome. If anything, it proves that nation has had it with bad governance, grown desperate for improvements, and may be ready to embrace a new progressive party to supplant both Democrats and Republicans, neither of whom represent mainstream thinking or majority interests. Both bicyclists and independents outnumber those who affiliate with either party.

Surely a storm is coming. The Don will prove a corrupt puppet in the hands of a shrewd senate. International agreements will falter; foreign aid will ebb to lowest in a half century. During Dubya’s administration, nation suffered its worst recession, nearly equal to the Great Depression, some say worse. He already boasted of tax cuts for billionaires, voodoo trickle down economics that caused it. Oil prices will soar with his promise to end trade deals. War cannot be far off, since that represents fast track and last resort to diverting revenue into offshore accounts and private pockets. Billionaires laid their exit contingencies in place long ago with bicyclists, soldiers and workers providing a human shield for them.

As to domestic policy, "Fend for yourselves," has always been a conservative manta. This translates into grab whatever you want, ignore responsibilities, kill anyone who gets in your way, and run recklessly into ruin. Casinos cater to such piggish self interest, which president elect exemplifies. You will have to pay to secure president’s extensive holdings; Secret Service already plans to rent an entire floor of Trump Tower at $1.5 million/year. On Inauguration Day or soon after riots end, heads will roll, starting with FBI Director Comey, for not indicting Hillary when ahead in polls. "You're fired," an oft repeated and well known phrase will resound. He vows to cut NASA’s budget for studying earth’s climate. As under Bush, Trump will shrink agencies that oversee commerce, provide watchdog regulations, or succor the less fortunate. All this will foster consumer complaints, crime, death, frustration, joblessness, lawlessness, murder, repression, tyranny, and want. It will cost hundreds of thousands of good paying jobs. Abortion patients may serve mandatory jail sentences while miscreants freely roam. They intend to clear gridlock for the privileged to race along unimpeded wherever they want. Those forsaken may turn to bicycling their last resort to remain mobile. Almost everything on your bicycle will cost more since prices for imports will increase, though maybe the few remaining small domestic builders could expand.

Armageddon? The unthinkable can only cross threshold into reality when reason ceases and sociopaths decide policy. Changes affect rural homesteads least; suburbs and towns absorb most of the burden and harm. So backward rubes keep rabid conservatives in office on promises to punish anyone who thinks differently. One would call this textbook tyranny if aware beyond primitive and civilized above tribal. Yet society survived 8 years of Dubya because opposition maintained its resolve and people tightened their belts.Those with twin gifts of intellect and means will have to redouble their efforts to restore balance. On each beautiful ride, sometimes you crawl, sometimes you glide. You don’t need congressional or presidential approval to pursue decency, equanimity, fair trade, sustainable practice, and zero carbon footprint. But some policy shift could always sweep away almost anything that stands in the way of extremists, fascists and radicals, who wrestle for dominance alone.

Game Emplane

Major League Baseball's 2016 World Series ended a 108 year drought for latest champions Chicago Cubs. Winning coach Joe Maddon, named in 2015 a record-tying 3 times as Manager of the Year (and chance to stand alone after next week’s announcement), rides a bicycle to clear his head, explore many cities he visits, and get creative about how to win. He also mountain bikes off season and whenever possible; Bike&Chain last mentioned him in 2008 (p. 477 of Companion Reader). Losing coach Terry "Tito" Francona prefers his Harley motorcycle; did warn him to get a bicycle. Although Francona won 2 championships with Red Sox, only once in 2013 was he named Manager of the Year, an honor usually awarded to skippers with season records better than 100/62. He was nominated 8 times, and would probably accept another, since they award it to the best in both Leagues, American and National. Ironically, Tito presided over the end of the Red Sox's 86 year drought in 2004, but fell 1 run short in 10th inning hosting in Cleveland, after earlier sweeping Red Sox to get his Indians into this World Series. Doesn’t mean that Boston’s team wasn’t represented with Crisp, Epstein, Napoli, Francona, Lester, nearly Maddon himself, and Ross all playing pivotal roles as previous Red Sox champions.

Every Olympic game since 1896 included bicycle races. In 1908, the last time Cubs emerged on top, over 1 million bikes were sold in United States representing $13.6 million in sales. It was the year Ford Model T, among the all time top 10 selling motor vehicles, was introduced. Yet by the end of 1909, there were still only 200,000 passenger cars across America, less than 10% of bicycles then in service. After a century, cars now outnumber bikes by about 3:1, less than you'd think given the $1 trillion feds spend on interstate highways every decade and only $1 billion on bikeways this century following a spending drought in preceding 4 decades. Bicyclists surely need less than motorists, but not nothing, just painted stripes to share pavement they also pay for in income and property taxes.

Vote yes on referenda for a few millions in bonds toward adapting shoulders and finishing bikeways. Any infrastructure will get used and help ease tension between bicyclists and motorists. Consider candidates who support bicycling, too. Humpty Trumpty, having sponsored a national race in 1989, absolutely reviles them, wouldn’t be caught dead on one, though with the pace of bankruptcies surrounding his empire he might someday have to. Like Kerry, her Secretary of State predecessor, Hillary, shown on cycling family holiday in Martha’s Vineyard, promises not to forget bicycling improvements. Privileged conservatives can afford and usually need heart transplants; they don’t get how mobility eventually raises deprived people into trading partners.

Between elections and sports, how can readers wonder why there were no posts in last 2 months? Winning is why players persist, for example Series MVP Ben Zobrist, who produced the go-ahead RBI for Cubs in 10th inning, because rewards are heaped on heroes. Pitchers who strike out more batters than they allow bases will earn more in a year than corporate CEOs, yet seldom win more than 2 dozen games a season out of 3 dozen appearances. That's a deliriously high pay rate, possibly $300,000/hour, more than a skilled surgeon who performs transplants and saves lives. Leads some to question what capitalists value, seemingly entertainment above society’s survival. Bicycles seldom suit such a lifestyle, since continuous travel by bus and jet with sports equipment leave little patience for any perilous, slow crawl. Yet Maddon's role is more cerebral than physical and requires only changes of clothes and uniforms, so in his case emplaning with a bike provides a game changing advantage, as it does for 49 million other contingent workers, 40% of nation's 122 million workforce, who bravely face brutal financial pressures, holes in safety nets, and other uncertainties on a daily basis. Sport spectacles barely make working for a living tolerable. Venues do provide subsistence jobs for those not participating on field, and untold wealth for those who own teams, perform at major league pinnacles, or produce broadcast content.

Sources of sustenance are no longer readily available or taken for granted despite a slew of unaddressed issues. Society hugely relies on advanced technologies for which basic education in the 3R's has become inadequate. Students may gravitate toward what they’re good at or wired for, but shouldn’t expect gainful employment, since will likely arrive ill equipped to handle 21st Century challenges. Maybe this explains baseball’s wide appeal, an avocation for any teen and twentysomething capable and willing to train hard and truly leave every ounce of effort on diamond of dreams, no computer savvy or trigonometric solutions required. Hit ball, run fast, score safely, stay healthy, and win games. Sounds simple, no? Were it so, Maddon wouldn't need his bicycling meditations to fathom baseball's humbling intricacies or subtle machinations.

Commuter Train

What's the perfect bike commute? Must meet one’s own criteria for convenience, distance, health, schedule, terrain, and weather. Long have met own challenge, “Bike there instead of drive, if and when you can.” Those who take pride in propelling self would be remiss not to ride every dry day ≤3 miles each way, 3 days a week for ≤10 miles, and, say, minimally once weekly ≥15 miles. Comfortable cripples disagree, consider it likely to cause distress, and rather drive. Avid cyclists, annoyed at having to dress for less, often skip a 20 mile round trip as if preposterous excess. That’s only 100 miles per typical workweek. An example of whom to speak, Sam Bennett, Lanterne Rouge of 2016 Tour de France, covered >500/week for a month. Sure, bicycle sensible attire does not equal business casual. Have to bathe and change upon arrival, it’s true, but shouldn't let inconveniences deter you. There are always ways to extend routes and vary routine. Adapting to a different scene and new styles expands your mind. Rainy days address lawn duress, and are for swapping out odorous duds for laundress. Why not find advantages in all this logistical planning and physical training which prepare you for charity rides and criterium trials?

In latest role, commute climbs outbound with fresh legs in quiet dark on empty streets usually without slowing wind. Mentally replay folk tunes from youth by Bob, Mary, Paul, Pete, and Peter, Early Morning Rain. Suits introspective mood of an hour of slow slog begun in gloom that morphs into cool glow before sun eventually gains horizon. Begin amidst left over damp and miasma rising and steaming from morning sewers, but end with ducks preening on a golden serene pond. They say, “The darkest hour is before dawn,” to offer hope to anyone beset or deep in debt and each institutional resident, but it seems more like the best time to bike and least likely hour to encounter evildoers, though mostly notice crackheads, early risers racing to lousy jobs, and truckers abusing noisy beasts that probably wouldn’t pass mandatory inspection. Emperor Wu, who marches around his bistro, greets all alike including you. Teen cheerleaders waiting for their school bus sometimes urge, “Go, go, go,” as you fly past. Afternoons don sport headphones and sunglasses and roll downhill, enjoying prevailing tailwinds, along a motor free bike path to heavy metal, rap, and rock, "Run to You," referring to those at home preparing for a meal together. Return with tail tucked in after having been drained, but never complained, blessed amidst so many still unemployed due to domestic policy neglect. Bicycling boosts mood and leaves belligerence along roadside, or so the faithful have always confessed.

Bicycling invites in nature after spending long days in climate control. Concerned over EEE, Lyme Disease, West Nile Virus, or Zika? Bugs don’t usually bite or even alight when you’re cruising by bike. Did get stung by a pesky bee while trying to scratch an itch, inhaled some swarming gnats or midges, noticed jersey flecked with creature specks, but seldom worry even after swallowing a fly. Will someday surely die, but not because of it. Does choosing sensuality and embracing uncertainty elevate or reduce stress? Some thrive best when things are a mess. Seldom do anything twice exactly the same way, since conditions continuously vary. Change exercises reason, fosters tolerance, and increases understanding. Battle hardens combatants. When you face fears, probe boundaries, and survive, you grow immune to those who dare to impugn your transportation preference and ignore who’s jejune. When poor planning forgets bulk of contingencies, biking and brainpower both belong as remedies.

Do witness frightful behaviors. Beyond angry dogs, loitering gangs, soliciting whores, and staggering drunks, witnessed a guy brandishing a handgun threatening a sweatily defiant foe. He clearly warned, “It only takes one shot,” while retreating target gave him the double-barreled finger; okay, not exactly an OK Corral showdown, more resembled mayhem Lily Allen describes in her song LDN. Hugged base of wall to avoid catching lead in a likely miss and winding up as collateral damage. About all you can say about those who slash, steal, and want to see the world burn is they are the plague to avoid. Such situations seduce driving in rather than letting world in by pedaling. Vulnerable by bike, you doubt any attempt to oppress but notice more beauty and ugliness than motorists. Admit being fearful leaving home in black of night so exposed. Bright lights don't minimize hazards or reveal benevolence of a stranger cloaked in shadows. You can hardly see real menace of debris and potholes to your wheel, yet that too slows pace so reduces danger.

Afternoons harbor traffic havoc. Can hardly hear hiss and slap of trailing motor vehicle tires that bark their aggressive presence. Truckers rather meet a schedule than preserve a life. Car drivers at stop signs curse you as you pass intersections at 12 mph for an elapsed 2 seconds, yet they'd be content to wait 6 seconds for a tractor trailer to pass. They deem commercial trucking more important than whatever a cyclist might be doing, which might be traveling to conduct billions in commerce. Post ride you may be haunted by mood slumps after elation from endorphins and oxygen, and woozy feeling of gliding along, around, down and up that sometimes grips you when you're not riding. These frights soon pass.

Fear can literally kill you. By choosing an allegedly safe automotive shell, you invite a hell of a lot more highway threats against your life from impatient drivers desperate to slam into you in their conditioned response to be first, cut you off, and go fast to nowhere. By car, you’re death bait, downright anesthetized, dried like jerky, driven insane too much, vacuum packed, and woefully out of touch. Today's passenger car only seems like an extension of your parlor recliner. Always sitting, even while speeding through space, is as deadly as shooting or smoking. Stress itself debilitates. Bending to doubts limits your chances to derive biking’s benefits. Dark and light further highlight balance and lurch, blaze and smolder, calm and panic, yin and yang of bicycling, things that terrify those who run in routine ruts. Contented, tame, undisturbed cattle can be effectively bilked or milked. Nervous rabble seek abated anxiety and cool comfort. Being bright, enthusiastic and proactive intimidates mushrooms, nipple suckers, parasites, and vegetables. So hide your habits, or make little of them, lest they try to single you out from herd as an example to sacrifice.

Commuting by bike can trigger trains of thought that serve as sources for new blog entries. It’s the cycle of life, what goes through this cyclist’s mind on repeated circuits to daily destinations, meditations on life’s meaning. After driving over 500,000 miles then bicycling its hourly equivalent of 125,000 miles, collected myriad comparative insights from which to build Bike&Chain. Blog entries since raised them to a reliable level. Could focus on one point and make a case about it with gathered facts, as would any forensic or scientific investigator. Would only deprive readers and spoil fun. But if this were an appeal to get your butt onto a saddle, it wouldn’t have relayed recent agonies or waited until you already hung up equipment for winter storage. But internet blogs are global. Your local conditions may vary. It’s a brand new cycling season below equator. Tropics aren’t affected by daylight saving topics.

Midway through November, days here become too short to provide optimal visibility for already distracted and impaired motorists, who increasingly need their cars to decide when to stop for them. They used to joke about drivers so inept that cars drove them, yet driverless vehicles occupy horizon and worry bicyclists probably forgotten by this development.

Candy Quesne

La Mélancolie des dragons is Philippe Quesne’s absurdist theater play in which aging rockers stuck in a broken car are aided by naïf bicyclist Isabelle. Quesne, pronounced Cain, means oak in French, a language Labann has leaned on a lot lately for ever harder to find rhymes with chain. Play becomes an eye candy spectacle of kinetic art. Over a century ago (1913), French absurdist artist Marcel Duchamps produced the first ever kinetic sculpture, a bicycle fork and wheel mounted upside-down on an oak stool, a so-called readymade mashup of disparate functions, now lost. Bicyclists dread being stuck in place while spinning furiously. All too human. One wonders what became of humanistic Los Angeles artist and Midnight Ridazz regular Sarah Sitkin, aka Candy Cane.

While you’d expect artists and musicians like Talking Heads frontman David Byrne to warm to wheels, what’s happening with conservative actor/politician Arnold Schwarzenegger? The former Republican “Governator” of California denounced climate change against GOP hardliners and own Hummer collection, and has been seen recently riding a bicycle in Edinburgh, Scotland. Everyone is most assuredly allowed a change of direction and heart. Clint Eastwood, on the other hand, endorsed Trump, who claims any global warming warning is a Chinese ruse. Were he still alive B. T. Barnum would have had a better explanation for Trump’s polarized popularity, “A sucker is born every minute.” Eastwood once grumbled, “I tried being reasonable. I didn’t like it.” While acting responsible is only a duty to yourself, rest of world acts independently of your personal convictions yet suffers from your attitudes and vices.

Another setting star, Niner QB Joe Montana rides his bike to be closer to his family (and likely to ease knees for which he’s legendary). You can join him for better cardiovascular fitness, or race in Amgen’s Tour of California. Candy cranks out a roster of reasons why you should choose cycling. You can deck out your handlebars with a candy cane wrap by following directions from San Francisco's finest Mission Bicycle Company.

Along with other successful corporations with enormous facilities, Epic Medical Software maintains a fleet of black bicycles for their main campus in Verona, Wisconsin, so employees can borrow and cut the 10 minute walk across to a 2 minute ride. They emulate at least 2 dozen big companies including previously mentioned Apple, Facebook, Linked-in, Mercedes Benz, and Nike. Am intimately familiar with at least one company that actively discouraged bike commuting, now out of business. Although anecdotal, does say something, no?

Polls suggest the most popular color of bicycles is still candy apple red. Many builders default to red; some, like Richard Sachs, used to supply only his signature team red. With increasing use of carbon fiber, black has begun to supplant, though buyers also prefer brushed or clear finished natural metal. Doesn’t matter. Whatever wavelength of light gets brightly reflected gradually fades as sun sets. All offer the same sweet ride whenever you decide to go out and glide.

Braiment de l’âne

Conventions are over, presidential nominees and running mates named. For good reason Democratic Party is depicted as a braying donkey and Republican Party a bellicose elephant with a long memory of privilege and proclivity for stomping anything in its way. Extremism is brutish, repulsive, and uncivilized. America’s moderate majority has long since been beaten into silent submission by media aggression. If you apply logic to contest anything they say, or point out inconsistencies from day to day, you’re branded traitor, called coward, labeled liar who newshounds will gainsay. Dare impugn your honesty? They know nothing of thee: Influential Independent, no liberal tolerant, objective author, person who cares, seeker of truth, and singular creator of whom polarized simpletons will never be cognizant. To resist being cornered and to speak intelligently make radicals and thugs freak out and react with hostility.

Lived through one inane Republican administration after the next, all of which enjoyed congressional dominance, each of which were recovered by Democrats who spent tax dollars not yet collected. Mismanagement? Hardy. Rather national rape, race to oligarchy, resource disparity, and return to slavery. Honestly, who'd want to be associated with either party? Blue, red, or white, Eeewww! Divided you fall, leave some huge leverage hole for abominable despots or muslim clerics to fill.

GOP, the new know-nothing party, actively promotes class warfare, always causes recessions, and never succeeds due to its reactionary stupidity. Drug addled masses invite conservatism, monarchism even, because following dictates offers the luxury of turning off your brain. Xenophobic farmers and ranchers relate to GOP’s stranger disapproval and stronger approval of property ownership. Narrow-minded conservatives and nazis in Nebraska act as if blameless and everything everyone else does that doesn't perfectly align with their bizarre compulsions is criminal. Urban liberals for whom suffering fools and trading fairly are compulsions gravitate to Democrat side for want of an organized alternative. Meanwhile, majority going along in normality mode wouldn't think of blaming these mental defectives for their aberrant behavior, merely ignore, pity, or politely deter them. But some crimes can't be acquitted, and some diseases must be treated. Gun ownership presents a particular dilemma among martinets trying to enforce false notions of morality.

In shockingly clueless juxtaposition, Crews blurted out, “Right to own guns to protect families" and… "Sanctity of every single human life,” as if adversaries can be demoted to alien zombies and fetuses promoted to community property. Is this just an agenda drum thump from the stump or mindless admission of acumen slump? Has he not heard that insane gunmen are killing policemen? Those of privilege think guns and police protect their property and wealth; most don’t know how to apply either as deterrents, and tragedies strike more often to those who bring heat or own guns. Many sheriffs retire without ever having to draw one against a criminal, but you can be sure that recent killings will revisit innocents in a blur of retaliatory responses rationalized by self preservation. Speaker Cryin vowed retribution for a congressional Democratic sit-in protesting guns for the demented, a core conservative constituency.

GOP’s latest tactic is to cast a pall over Democratic nominee by belaboring a cynical witch hunt into prosaic email and phone text as if they might reveal state secrets, which they’ll continue through election day or until nobody pays any mind. GOP wasted years trying to impeach husband for having a legal pedestrian sex affair, when they could have jailed Republican religious clerics for heinous pederasty. About the only female head of state anyone remembers is Brit Hatcher, but she was a conservative medusa who turned anyone who looked at her into stone, probably why she wore that big hat. Chauvinists, misogynists, and rotarians are already against Billary, and they are legion. With the ill informed only hearing appeals to fear and pride, they miss what maneuvered them into a choice between bad and worse. GOP's "all or nothing" mentality is moronic, seditious, and tyrannical. Supportive mainly of automotive, Big Oil, commerce, defense, guns, and rules that apply to you not them - never gender identity, human rights, minority voting, sexual preferences, religious freedoms, and whatever else they deem suspect - key Republicans such as Clandenstine, Connedaway, Gorgon, Laundry, and Quaylude betray their inability to treat diverse individuals fairly, and lack of capacity to understand immorality. You can be sure whatever they say is rooted firmly in self interest rather than societal ethics. Rabble rally around their position, even though they seldom share in proceeds. Potential for greed is a powerful incentive.

Can’t they think of something better to do, like keep police safe from gun lunatics or reverse pubic debt every citizen shares? Agency, federal and state debt combined exceeds $30 trillion. Or is it a state secret where all this loot went? Bundles went to bankers, cabinet, chief, conflict caterers, foreign powers, and oil monarchy, instigators of terrorism against Americans. GOP nominee blamed lame duck for $19 trillion in federal debt, when a GOP run Congress was responsible. Duck inherited $17 trillion from Dubya, so did well to slow sprint to insolvency by ignoring mockery and improving prosperity. Debt spiraling out of control would doom every human.

As an Independent from the only viable party, never lazily pull one lever, and want to puke on every poster with moronic slogan, "Make America Great Again!" Not surprisingly, Donald aping Ronald accuses wrong parties with similar names, casts aspersions falsely, and says whatever supporters want to hear. Beset by conservative schoolyard bully tactics, Americans will jump to conclusions where angels dare not decide. Candidate has no chance to make good on this empty promise, even if he uses his billions to create more bingos for bimbos. Not presidents, representatives and senators govern nation, set policy, and write laws. The Don, like a mafia godfather, spreads fears and shame, as exemplified by Fox News fiction. America is already the greatest nation on earth from many perspectives; for example, its hard working classes are willing to abide any billionaire buffoon who insults everyone based on creed, gender, race, and service unto death. Support he enjoys signals a backlash against political correctness and descent into tribal spear rattling. Voters already dismissed as a hysterical egomaniac another supposedly self-made tycoon who presumed that qualified him as chief executive. Another dunce with no track record of public service, not even dog catcher, now blusters against a shady lady who spent 40 years serving in high offices, thereby inviting suspicion. Ironic how incessant drone "unfit to lead" now actually describes a POTUS pretender. Every vote for a marshmallow comb-over says another citizen has given up on this e pluribus unum crucible sustained through its diversity. Democracy loses all meaning if you hand over power to a king who'll delegate domestic and foreign policy and pontificate on issues over which he has no control. By the way, there is already a wall between Mexico and US under which countless tunnels have been dug. Every smuggled drug helps another clown run.

Electorate may miss an opportunity to restore balance in a congress dominated by Republican conservatism and tea party stupidity. Oust these maniacs and parasites. All attention is paid to animosities between Democrats (31% of voters) and Republicans (29%). But, as always, races will be decided by Independents, 38% of voters, who'll elect candidates on empty pocketbooks, merit, and message, not party endorsement. Independents are represented by a two wheeled horse, something bound to give a better ride than stubborn donkey or stupid pachyderm. Were you laid off during previous administration then rehired under current? Then you, too, should hold a grunge against bad governance.

What disgusts most is the degree to which inane commentary reigns in this election cycle. Issues which should be discussed are buried in illogical nonsense and sound bites. Democrats, with their clever speeches about responsible policy, sound to addlebrained throng as blah, blah, boring details, as if the braying of an ass. Unless an extreme sweet tweet that shocks, ordinary remarks have no capacity to capture minds or votes, and so are ignored. One ought to delight in accounts of how something went well, how whatever was accomplished served entire community, or how whoever participated was overjoyed with rewards and satisfaction. Instead, pols hit the road, spin wheels, and tour at your expense. Progress will never suit privileged few or those without a clue on how things could be better for you. Unless nation continuously improves and pulls together, it relentlessly declines.

“For I've been traveling on a boat and a plane, in a car, on a bike, with a bus and a train. Traveling there, traveling here, everywhere in every gear. But, oh Lord, we pay the price, with the spin of the wheel with the roll of the dice. Ah yeah, you pay your fare. And if you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there… And I've been traveling through the dirt and the grime, from the past to the future, through the space and the time… I've been traveling on a wing and a prayer, by the skin of my teeth, by the breadth of a hair. Traveling where the four winds blow, with the sun on my face, in the ice and the snow.” George Harrison, Any Road, 1988, on posthumous album Brainwashed, 2002

Rain for Spain

Been watching Chris Froome zoom to his third Tour de France victory thanks to steady team pacing by Cardiff Giant Geraint Thomas, and Spain finally represented on next to last stage because Ion Izagirre descended fearlessly from col de Joux-Plane to Morzine in rain, whereas tentative members of peloton had all seen crashes on wet slick and white lines. Congratulations to all who embraced this 2,200 mile, 3-week torture with tens of thousands of feet of climbs, even those who never finished, though a record number, 175 among world’s best cyclists, did.

Between stages, been searching for films that depict bicycling culture conspicuously, summarized by year below. IMBD currently lists 1,100 movie and television plots that somehow involve bikes, some of which have already been mentioned, though others don’t bear to be. Neglect staying on top, and so many perfect examples drop like rain you can scarcely keep up. Propelled to an obsession, begins to resemble trainspotting or wondering just how many other ubiquitous appliances - such as blenders, movie cameras and spectacles - are used or worn and could be reported. In some respects, don’t blenders and eyeglasses resemble bicycles?

James Earl Jones in Dreamrider (Bill Brown, dir., 1993. 92 min.) inspires a young man who lost his leg in a motorcycle accident, played by actual para-athlete Matthew Geriak, to follow his dream, which means accepting a bet to ride his 10 speed Raleigh from Fullerton, CA to Boston, MA. Breaks a cross country time record, then gives away bike to first kid to greet him at Old North Church. Based on life story of Bruce Jennings and filmed entirely on location in a succession of cities, last reel finally exhibits some one-legged bicycling.

In made-for-television feature Footprints in the Snow (Richard Spence, dir., 2005, 96 min.), Julie Hill, paralyzed in a car crash, abides experimental treatment, restores leg mobility, returns to riding bikes with family, and thereby saves marriage.

Horror/slasher film Shadow (Federico Zampaglione, dir., 2009, 77 min.) is about soldier David, who, after serving in Iraq, begins a bicycle tour of Europe, defends beautiful Angeline, gets hunted by troublemakers, and winds up kidnapped by freaks.

The Parking Lot Movie (Meghan Eckman, dir., 2010, 14 min.) documents attendants of a Charlottesville, Virginia lot, who get by on bicycles and skateboards and get even with typically rude SUV drivers.

After an automobile accident, a veteran cyclist, played by director, acquiesces to train a prodigy (Michael Cuddire) yet struggles to teach him how to unleash The Potential Inside (Scotty Curlee, dir., 2010, 37 min.).

Catching Up (John Jenkins-Stark, dir., 2011, 7 min.) follows pressures facing a semipro racer in a sport that fellow Americans seldom appreciate. The European Grand Tours may attract unruly fans, but world’s hardest bicycle race crosses United States and has already inspired scores of films.

Traffic in L.A. Sucks (Rocio Mesa, dir., 2011, 18 min.) for Rocio, who arrives from Spain believing motoring is the only way around this megacity. Left after a crash without a car or cash, she turns to bicycling for a happy shock.

The Bike Heist (Brttany Baxter & Curtis Cleveland, dirs., 2012, 88 min.) occurs after avid cyclist’s bike and one he borrows from cute neighbor get stolen. Chaos ensues when an old friend suggests title caper to swipe all bikes in apartment building and wriggle out of responsibility.

Break Away (South African, Frans Cronjé & Morné Theunissen, dirs., 2012, 118 min.) has Francois (Frans Cronjé) applying advice from a pro cyclist and riding an old bicycle to deal with job loss, provide for family, and recognize own values.

Fixation (Alex Trudeau Viriato, dir., 2012, 40 min.) celebrates joys of fixed gear bicycling in Los Angeles, San Francisco, and San Jose.

High Tech, Low Life (Mandarin, Stephen Maing, dir., 2012, 27 min.) introduces Tiger Temple and Zola, two bloggers who take on the Great Firewall of China to report about issues government wants to suppress. Tiger sets off across country on a bicycle, Zola on a motorcycle, both armed with digital tools and free speech desires.

PBS ran a series in 2012, Pedal America, which can still be seen online.

Aftermass: Bicycling in a Post-Critical Mass Portland (Joel Biel, dir., 2013, 75 min.) describes how activism transformed the now famously bike friendly Oregon city.

In July, 2011, for 10th anniversary of attacks on September 11th, six Los Angeles firefighters biked 3,300 miles in 45 days across America to New York, documented in Let’s Roll (Matt Holwick, dir., 2013, 83 min.). They battled conflicts, despair, physical injuries, and severe weather; raised funds for Leary Firefighters Foundation and Wounded Warrior Project; and stayed overnight in welcoming fire stations.

In The Bicycle (James Richards, dir., 2014, 72 min.) resentful black 10-year-old Bobbi and divorced mother’s finance, 36-year-old Teddy, can’t stand each other. But when Bobbi’s bike is stolen, Teddy sees it as a chance to bond with his future stepdaughter.

In magic realism short The Bicycle Man (“Cyklisten”, Swedish, Aarne Norberg, dir., 2014, 13 min.), soccer mom in Torne River Valley suffers a tragic traffic loss then witnesses a miraculous healing by an Italian cyclist headed to the Arctic Circle. Cynical journalist wants to disprove.

Bikeman Begins (Odin Lindblom & W. H. Bourne, dirs., 2014, 100 min.) explores environmental superheroes riding bicycles to Comic Con in San Diego and resulting mayhem.

A Convenient Truth (Dominick Bagnato, dir., 2014, 85 min.) blows whistle on California assemblyman Coleman Burleson’s plan to cure climate warming, energy shortfall, foreign oil dependence, illegal immigration, obesity epidemic, and unemployment with a unified solution: Hire workers to pedal bicycles that generate electricity in his factory.

Serbian film The Disobedient (Mina Djukic, dir., 2014, 106 min.) sees childhood best friends reunite as adults and spontaneously embark on a bike tour and misbehavior.

Fort Tilden (Charles Rogers & Sarah-Violet Bliss, dirs., 2014) is the summer destination for NYC fixed gear hipsters (Bridey Elliot and Clare McNulty), who, like a lots of young adults lately, seem stuck in adolescence.

Njinga (Martin McCann, dir., 2014, 138 min.) documents Kate Leeming’s unprecedented transit of equatorial Africa by mountain bike, 13,700 miles in 10 months of 2010, to highlight needs of a poverty stricken, war torn continent.

Omega Rose (Australian, George Dorobantu, dir., 2014, 100 min.) begins 3 years after all but ten million humans have been annihilated. A bicyclist rides to a show that might explain what happened.

April 9th (Roni Ezra, dir., 2015, 33 min.) is a docudrama about Denmark in 1940, when the first troops Danes could muster against German blitzkrieg were South Jutland bicyclists.

The Ataxian (Zack Bennett & Kevin Schlanser, dirs., 2015, 21 min.) is a documentary about Kyle Bryant, unable to walk because of terminal nerve disease Friedreich’s Ataxia, who nevertheless attempts the bike Race Across America (RAAM) to seize every moment versus mortality.

Odd couple with a long distance attraction meet in Paris but quarrel over her gift of The Bicycle (Arne Körner, dir., 2015, 82 min.). The Bicycle is listed as a cast member.

Bike Against the Wind (Mark Vashro, dir., 2015, 60 min.) documents director’s 4,700 mile ride from Boston to San Diego through American South, and interviews locals he meets along the way.

In 2012 racer Jason Lane, The Hammer (Hornsby films, 2015, 85 min.), attempted RAAM, world’s hardest cycling race, 3,000 miles in 10 days. On day 3 he got run over by his own sag vehicle yet persevered.

Ithaca (Meg Ryan, dir., 2015, 96 min.) is based oh William Saroyan’s Pulitzer Prize winning novel, The Human Comedy. Set during WWII, teen bicycle messenger Homer Macauley (Alex Neustaedter) delivers telegrams to families of fallen soldiers. Mom and pop are played by bankable stars Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks.

Filmmaker bikes 6,500 miles to Alaska to name a mountain, Mount Lawrence (Chandler Wild, dir., 2015, 90 min.), after his father, an outdoor enthusiast who committed suicide.

The Rider and the Wolf (Nathan Ward, dir., 2015, 62 min.) documents mountain biking pioneer Mike Rust. Rust often repeated Stewart Parker’s line, “The bicycle has a great past ahead of it.” Defending his home in remote San Luis Valley, he chased out intruders but was never seen again.

Blue Bicycle (“Mavi Bisiklet”, Turkish, Ümit Köreken, dir., 2016, 94 min.) looks at preteen Ali, played by Selim Kaya, forced to weigh his dream of owning a bicycle against democratic justice.

Set in Aqaba, Jordan, Five Boys and A Wheel (Said Zagha, 2016, 20 min.) is an Arabic-language adaptation of Raymond Carver's novella Bicycles, Muscles, Cigarettes.

Ovarian Psycos (Joanna Sokolowski & Kate Trumbull-Lavalle, dirs., 2016, 72 min.) covers an East LA bike crew of Latina self described misfits who ride together as protection against neighborhood violence.

Interesting 15 second 2016 spot for Quaker Oats has child fueled on oatmeal take his first “Bike Ride”.

During 103rd Tour de France, Smith showed a race specific ad for its sport sunglasses. Taiwanese manufacturer Giant was another major sponsor with a commercial for their line of bikes and a team with as many stage wins, 2, as Froome’s, Sky. GMC didn’t disappoint with typically nauseating SUV commercials to match the horrific use of motored vehicles running down pedestrians and snapping frame of Froome’s bike on Mount Ventoux.

Bicyclist crosses Maine and finds Somes Sound to be Too Cold to Swim (D. W. Young, dir., 2016, 80 min.). He then befriends an ex-marine and younger sister, and reconnects with dying, estranged father.

Fish Without Bicycles (Daisy Aitkens, dir.), in oven and not due until 2017, concerns unwed motherhood. Based on oft repeated metaphor for women not needing men, don't know if bicycles will show prominently.