Messages might not be timely, and time plays tricks on memory. Labann scratches his head on why Richard Ballantine (1940-2013), American scion of Bantam Books publishing family, author of Richard’s Bicycle Book (aka “the bike-shed bible” from a half century ago, 1972) followed by 7 other cycling-centric titles (millions sold), and founder of Bicycle Magazine, has been forgotten. From early recognition of 1970’s bike boom, exposés of automotive greed, practical advice on buying and owning not just bikes but in general human powered vehicles, and protests against Vietnam War, wouldn’t be surprised his works were actively suppressed. Could explain why he mostly resided in London, where he kick started mountain biking by importing England’s first 20 units of Ritchey Montares. Ironically, when you google his name, you find dead twenty-year-old Marine PFC Richard Ballantine on Vietnam Veterans Wall of Faces, but not so much about this eccentric but influential cycling advocate, who gradually grew to understand how bicyclists are reluctant warriors against a vicious paradigm fueled by blood and petroleum.
For the first Earth Day, April 22, 1970, ecology aware San Jose State College students bought a brand new Ford Maverick, disrespected it in a mock parade, then buried it on campus. After Ralph Nader, people began to see cars as counterproductive to human survival. Still under attack 5 decades later, environment received a chance for justice after post-election policy reversals. Had to expect that fighting for planet’s sake would be controversial. They say the first casualty of war is truth, though soldiers whose lives are on the line don’t buy it.
While Biden promises a new round of bicycling infrastructure projects, he also intends to create a million new stateside automaker jobs. Reliance on obsolete, unsustainable mono-industry makes little sense in long run, whereas grants and rewards for positive innovations and practical inventions do. Yet elite pols heavily invested in EPVs, solar and wind rile neocon wonks. Cars and computers are no longer such necessities; climate, energy, food, housing, potable water, and vaccines remain biggest challenges to survival, especially if your policies do nothing to mitigate motor vehicles, which remain world’s biggest threat to all when you take wars for oil and wastes collectively into account.
Texas shut down in February with widespread suffering after decades of oil production caused climate change that affected jet stream and drew a polar vortex to freeze them, while regulators neglected to foresee and plan a suitable contingency. Texas is the only US state that privatized its electric grid, shuffling contract to insiders, all of whom have been fired or chosen to resign. So typical: Suck millions in obligatory taxes, then stick payers with consequences, so you can abscond to relax in tropical luxury. Global warming poses yet another threat, howling, punishing winds; never before saw so many rogue gales that menace bicyclists more than most. Regular people are forced to hunker down and read by candlelight, or computer screens, if lucky enough to still have service. In aftermath of catastrophe and contagion, some bake sourdough bread, sculpt marchpane whimsies for guests who weren’t invited, or solve crossword puzzles while sensing a García’s Márquez’s moment of love, plague, solitude, and yearning.
Busy online in advance of Earth Day 2021, collected 5 dozen previously unlisted bicycling songs from all over the globe, posted below (in order by year of release), many thanks to Alex Chang, who has been continually updating a Youtube channel that has reached 200+ videos from widespread sources and years, including Finland and Russia. Also updated definitive spreadsheet linked on Wikipedia, which, while impossible to ever be comprehensive, does contain more vetted non-covers than any other list on planet, about 2,150.
Cal Stewart, Uncle Josh on a bicycle [spoken word], single, Berliner, 1899
Cal Stewart, Uncle Josh Weathersby on a bicycle [spoken word], single, Victor, 1901
Comedy from over a century ago viciously attacked cycling for its impracticality. For decades dozens of different but similar versions were recorded. Joke’s on Josh, because bicycling got better and safer, and four times as many go by bike as by car.
Orquesta Tropical, Mi Amor En Bicicleta [one-step dance instrumental,”My Love on a bicycle”], single, Victor, 1924
Earl Rouse & Brothers, Pedal Your Blues Away [c&w, 1936], John’s Old Time Radio Show, East River Records, 2015
Apparently R Crumb with Cheap Suit Serenader’s weren’t song’s originators, as this recent rerelease points out.
Six Hits and a Miss with Gordon Jenkins Orchestra, Two on a Bike, single, b-side of Bye Bye Blackbird, Capitol Records, 1943
Composed by Gene de Paul with lyrics by Don Raye, was included in soundtrack of Hi’Ya Chum (Harold Young, dir., 1943).
Silvana Pampanini, Ma dove vai bellezza in bicicletta [Italian], Beauties on a Bicycle [soundtrack], EDIC, 1951
From 70 years ago, this farce about chorus girls on a mixed modal road trip stars Pampanini, who sings title song, “But where are you going, beauty, by bicycle? Do not be in a hurry, stay a little on my heart. Leave the bike, give me your kisses...”
Freddie Sandy, The Bicycle Song, single, [unknown label and date]
Cover of Max Miller’s Let’s Have a Ride on Your Bicycle (1953) rife with sexual harassment and innuendo, probably comes from early 1960’s. “I said, my dear, if there’s nobody near, I’d like a ride on your bike... After the ride I began to perspire. It wasn’t the ride; I’d been pumping her tyre.”
Brita & Eikka, Polkupyörä [Finnish, juvenile, “Bicycle”], Brita ja Eikka laulavat lapsille, Scandia, 1960
Sung to Freddy Quinn tune Oh, My Darling Clementine, “We borrowed a bicycle... I pedal, you control, as a dance journey goes, to Grandma when we cycle the skyscraper is not visible... After a bike ride to grandma, I put the bike behind the barn next to the wall to sleep...”
The Rolling Stones, Something Happened to Me Yesterday, Between the Buttons, Decca, 1967
At end of trippy album closing tune, Mick Jagger says, ”So if you're out tonight, don't forget, if you're on your bike, wear white. Evening, all.” Album was one of their top sellers.
Jean Saint-Paul, Vas-Y Eddy [Belgian, “C’mon Eddy (Merckx)”], single 7", Phillips Records, 1967
Notable for being the first recorded song about Merckx, it’s partisan praise for nation’s biggest bicycling champion and most famous citizen.
Singing Guitars, aka Поющие гитары, Песенка велосипедистов [Russian rock, “Cyclist’s Song”], single/video, Мелодия [“Melody” label], 1969
“It was difficult for a man ten thousand years ago. He walked to the pharmacy, to work, to the zoo. He didn't know the bike, blindly believed in miracles. Because I have not tasted all the virtues of the wheel... Sit down and just press the pedal. And now in this world everyone is romping somewhere. Adults and children are riding to work, to the zoo. They go to the bathhouse and the pharmacy. They’re going to my mother-in-law for lunch.”
Wachauer Buam, Ja mir san mit'm Radl da [Austrian beer hall polka], “Yeah, we are here by bike”], single, Philips, 1971
“... two cavaliers, they’re going to the country party. You expect a Porsche, chrome-painted and super fine. But suddenly the boys hear it screaming from afar: ‘Yes, I'm there with my bike; yes, I'm there with my bike!’”
Peter Hinnen, Mir sind mit em Velo [Swiss-German, “I’m on my bike”], single, self 1973
Christoph Busse, Fahrradsong, Sesam, Öffne Dich! (Mit Liedern Aus Der Sesamstraße)[‘Open Sesame! (With Songs from Sesame Street)”], Fontana, 1976
Ripoff of Neil Young’s tune After the Gold Rush (1970) with own lyrics, supposedly aimed at juvenile listeners.
Marcos Valle, Bicicleta [Brazilian funk], single, Som Livre, 1984
Sahnie (Hans Runge), Fahrrad fahr’n [German], Erste Sahne, EMI, 1989 “I have an old bike, just like I need it. It's beautiful and environmentally friendly too! I'm riding a bike, my old rattling bike. I'll get new rims made of light metal and chrome.” An aside, Runge is also a bespoke state-of-the-arts super-fast car brand, whereas Rudge was a British bikemaker, like Humber, swallowed by Raleigh.
Jason Wang, Bike, Wang Shixian Sings Old Chinese Songs 4, Sinuo Beite/Sony, 1990
Rick Reed & The Ethereal Bastards, Dr. Hoffman's Million Year Bike Ride [eam], single/video, self, 1990
Bottlecap, The Bicycle Song, single, Tummy Button Cassingles, 1994
cLOUDDEAD, Bike 2, cLOUDDEAD, Mush/Bigda, 2001
cLOUDDEAD, Physics of a Bicycle, The Peel Session, self, 2001
cLOUDDEAD, Physics of a Unicycle, Ten, self, 2003
Used to think these four, including Bike 1 previously listed, were all the same under a different name. Once posted to Youtube, got to actually hear, and they are not, though that hardly matters given unintelligible content.
Eason Chan, 單車 [Chinese, “Bicycle’], Shall We Dance? Shall We Talk?, Emperor Entertainment Group/EEG Music, 2001
Juice Leskinen, Einarin polkupyörä [Finnish, “Einar’s Bicycle”], Juice Leskinen & Coitus Int, Love Records, 2003 rerelease bonus track
Lyrics describe finding a rusty bike under a barn, and riding it to a bar for beer and fallen angels.
Egotrippi, Polkupyörälaulu [Finnish, “Bicycle Song”], Matkustaja [“Passenger”], Zen Garden, 2003
“On your bike from the top of the hill, if you pedal really hard and don’t use the brakes, you can get into town in half an hour... Temptations in every direction. The wheels spin at a steady pace. I guess the bills go unpaid. How can it be possible... that all his money can be wasted... down to the last penny together in a record store. You can waste all your money down to the last penny with a good conscience.”
Bergelheim, Ich fahr Fahrrad [German indie, “I Ride a Bicycle”], Neuer Deutscher Pop - Aufnahmezustand 5 [compilation], XYX Music, 2006
“Only ride a bicycle and do what makes you happy.”
Holy Crow, The Bicycle Song, single/video, self, 2008
The Wonder Years, An Elegy For Baby Blue [indie punk], Won't Be Pathetic Forever EP, Hopeless Records, 2008
Anguish about bike being stolen: “It's like the world stopped revolving in the absence of you...Nothing about you but your wheel's been anything but true. Come on, man. You've been a good friend. I had that dream where we found you again... We didn't stand a chance. It broke my heart to watch them ride you down Mifflin. Sometimes, at night, I swear I hear you screaming, ‘No! No! Don't let me go...’ Dylan was right because it's all over now, Baby Blue... We're never (never) getting caught again. So, if you see them, tell them, 'Man, I just want my bike back.'"
Rock & Rollinger, Fahrrad [German, explicit], Rollst Du noch oder Rockst Du schon? ["Are you still rolling or are you already rocking?"], SM Noise Rec., 2009
Egotronic, Fahrradlied [German punk, “Bike Song”], Was Soll’s, self, 2010
Honey Trappists, Bicycle Ride Through the Nation’s Capitol (Lokin Out), Rough Jazz: Volume One, self, 2010
Vocokesh, Dr. Hofmann's Bicycle Ride [instrumental psychedelia], Dr. Hofmann's Bicycle Ride, Phonosphera Records, 2010
The Aquabats, Poppin' A Wheelie!, Hi-Five Soup!, Fearless, 2011
“I love love love love love love poppin' a wheelie! On my bike! When you see me outside with my wind-swept hair riding by with my wheel in the air, You’ll never see me happier... That’s when I pull those handlebars and get 'em in the air... And I'm the king of the world as I'm balancing.”
Dynamo Team, feat. Lulu, Roll the Dynamo [Slovak disco in English], Slavia, Lark Records, 2011
“After all day at school I am down. I need to get out, so I leave the town. I take my bike and roll the dynamo. I worked all day, now I should stop. It’s time to relax, at least I hope.”
Nico Touches the Walls, バイシクル [Japanese, “Bicycle”], Humania, Ki/oon Records/Sony, 2011
Ryan Hardy, Bicycle, Heavy Mandolin, self, 2011
Charity Kahn & the JAMband, Bike [juvenile], Family Values, self, 2012
Choi Jung In & Kang Gary aka 정인&개리, (자전거 [Korean, “Bicycle’], single, Sony-ATV, 2014
“We bike in the breeze. I keep smiling... Don’t stop, keep riding toward the sunset.”
Craig Richey, Girl on a Bicycle [instrumental], Girl on a Bicycle [soundtrack], Lakeshore Records, 2014
Charlie Burg, feat. Daniel James, Phillip's Bicycle, One, Violet, self, 2015
“On my bicycle I go too fast. The little shops that I ride past, he people's faces, they make me laugh. I approach the curve and stop to see a hill of true adversity. I think to myself, can anybody see me? I can't believe I'm better than I ever was... I am taken to a forest path where I trample autumn leaves and grass... my shoes are worn, my helmet's loose. I packed a sandwich and some juice. The wind and I have made a little truce”.
Bike, Enigma Do Dente Falso [Brazilian psychedelia, “False Teeth Puzzle”], 1943, 30th Cent. Rec., 2015
No discernible bike lyrics on this trippy album devoted to Dr. Albert Hoffman’s invention of LSD.
Schlappn, Altes Fahrrad [German, “Old Bike”], Back from Klappse, self, 2015
Dota Kehr, Rennrad, Keine Gefahr ["No Danger"], Believe Music, 2016
Vavan aka Владимир Селиванов (Vladimir Selivanov), Велосипед aka Velosiped [Russian, “Bicycle’], Zhenshchiny. Svoboda, Sony Music Entertainment (SME), 2016
“We'll leave here on a bicycle. We'll go wherever we want from here. Palm trees, the sea and the people.We will be welcomed and they'll notice that we're awesome.”
Celo & Abdi, Shimano XTR [German, explicit gangsta hip-hop], Diaspora, Azziackz, 2017
“G's on the street packaging tool, digital scales, cash, and my bike, get on the pedals, Bianchi Methanol [brand model]. Down the mountain, pack and seal, roll on carbon. Keep your balance with your phone to your ear. My driving style, sometimes fast, sometimes nice and slow.”
Chris Komus, Bicycle Rides with Dr Hoffman [eam], Sickly Fingers, Shanti Planti, 2017
Jason Bartsch, Son of Anarchy, 4478 Bochum, recordjet, 2017
I'll get my bike out of the garage, steering wheel up, nice retro look. My bikes are from Schwalbe. I'm a gangster in my hood... Whenever I cruise I am super ecological. I don't need an exhaust. I have legs and I am fashionable in time... I'm doing the tour through the village of Jan-Ullrich-Style... Cars stink. I'm more of the bicycle type.”
Stereophonics, fea. Kelly Jones, Boy On A Bike, Scream Above the Sounds, Parlophone Records Limited, 2017 “What am I running from? I used to be so fearless... I’d fly around the world. Suppose I’ve seen a lot of things, and maybe they left their mark. I know when you can't see what you're afraid of It's like being afraid of the dark... I used to feel so free when I was that boy on a bike riding down that silent snowy street in the valley that made me feel alive... But what's around the corner for me now? I gotta ride the whole street and take a turn.”
Auro, Schöne Mänsch Ufem Velo [German], single, self, 2018
Beautiful cyclists protesting too much war over last decade endure rubber pellets and water canons.
Rie Takahashi, Jitensha [Japanese], Hoshino Kizuna, Pony Canyon, 2018
“Go to see the sea by bicycle, aiming at the sun in the dawn sky. Chatting on undecorated days continues. Ride a bicycle and aim at the sun.”
Chevy & Park Bird, If I Could Ride a Bike, If I Could Ride a Bike, Sneaker Kids, 2019
“If I could ride a bike, I’d zoom around the world with you sitting there behind me. I’ll take you to places past several faces just livin' life so carefree... Oh, when you call me I'm drifting on clouds, like I'm dreaming. But in the morning, I’ll wake up and see that you're stuck here with me.”
D.A.B. feat. Spikey Spike, Op De Fiets [Dutch hip-hop], Het Begin Van Iets Groters [“The Beginning Of Something Bigger”], Walboomers Music, 2019
Jitterin’ Jinn, Jitensha [j-pop, “Bicycle”], single/video, Nippon-Columbia, 2019
Dominic Miller, Bicycle [jazz instrumental], Absinthe, ECM Records GmBH/Deutsche Grammaphon, 2019
Richard Eaton, The Bicycle Song [jazz instrumental], Songs of the Parkade, 1048381 Records DK, 2019
Team Dresch, Take on Me, Captain My Captain, self, 2019
“Wish I was riding bikes with you; I've sat down in the middle of this mess I've made of letters and clothes. Wish i was anywhere with you.”
Underwood, Vélocipède [eam], Vélocipède EP, Tanzgemeinschaft, 2019
Kinjal Dave, Cycle [Gujarati/Mumbai], Cycle, Zee Music, 2020
Myung-Jun Kim, Bicycle, Night walking alone, Five Senses Entertainment, 2020
Nick Goodman, I Want to Be Your Bicycle Seat, Heaven Sent Or..., self, 2020
“Honey, this Christmas I don’t want to fill with food... this year your love is all I need and to be the seat on your ten speed... I promise to be discrete.”
No comments:
Post a Comment