Obscene Sexteyn

Pedaling increases testosterone, which tempts scorchers into trysts for which they might need to atone. Among obese cyclists exploring trails, comely athenas might draw gaze of lonely clydesdales. For clergy, an acolyte or medieval sexteyn could sacrilegiously serve allegedly celibate pastors in sacristies. Bodies are driven by electrical synapses, endocrine hormones, and natural processes to procreate, produce, and seek releases regardless of moralities. Orgasms are a potent analgesic. Only a refined sense of consequence keeps reasonable people from drowning in regrettable pornographies, or endorsing sex trafficking criminalities. Though cracks in affection and fulfillment get filled with anger and resentment, nothing excuses interpersonal malfeasance. Expect to stew excessively in silence.

Johns, junkies, tweakers, and winos vainly volunteer their vulnerabilities to gangsters, murderers, pimps, and politicians, who wrap themselves in national flags and religious vestments. Half of illicit opioids are laced with China white, deadly fentanyl. Being impaired in public certainly doesn’t exonerate felonies but definitely encumbers legal docilities. In-car-cerated doesn’t mean stuck inside your comfy ride, rather you don’t get to pedal a conveyance where you’d like and must hide inside an imaginary shell among depraved predators in a prison hell. Convicts inside are given jobs, so, along with busy monsters hunting outside, get to celebrate Labor Day, which ought to exclude freeloaders and parasites, who make up an increasing portion of US populace. They don’t appreciate that sweat of exertion improves and purifies like nothing else.

However gross, messy, scary or smelly these realities sound, obscene instead describes arresting climate clarion Greta Thunberg and threatening her with a 6 month sentence for protesting Big Oil. So, it’s come down again to condemning youth for speaking truth, who were likewise honest and persecuted in the 1960’s, as history has proven. Conservatives since Nixon fatten upon fossil goo, gun sales, and tax breaks for wealthiest few at the expense of altruism, education, infrastructure improvements, job creation, social programs, and whatever else liberates those whom neocons crave to enslave. With elections looming, they’re condemning nonfiction blogs and books and hiking gasoline prices, economic terrorism they’ve relied upon time and time again.

While alternatives can be half-assed and standardization begets efficiencies, choices matter and deceits boomerang. Much more could be done to promote self propulsion, such as donating unused bicycles to charities, lobbying congress members and state legislators for code enforcement, setting good examples by riding responsibly, and welcoming newcomers of all ages. It’s no hardship dropping off hardware at local bike recyclers or forwarding tax deductible donations to such organizations as:

Bikes for the World - Rockville, MD, USA (99% rating)
Ships used bikes to economically challenged regions worldwide.

Bikes Not Bombs - Boston, MA, USA (82% rating)
Ships used bikes to economically challenged nations in Latin America.

International Bicycle Fund - Seattle, WA, USA
Promotes advocacy and awareness around the world.

Recycle-a-Bike - Providence, RI, USA
Teaches underprivileged teens to rebuild bicycles so they learn marketable skills and wind up with own transportation to work.

Salvation Army - Alexandria, VA (100% rating), plus 15,000 locations in 130 countries
Not only do they welcome drop offs, General Brian Peddle (not Pedal, but close enough), chief executive since 2018, wishes to sell used equipment at rock bottom prices with proceeds going to job therapy for addicts and indigents. What they don’t sell gets passed along periodically to other charities.

Two Wheeler Dealer - Wilmington, NC, USA
If you drop off a unit, they’ll refurbish and donate it for you.

World Bicycle Relief, Chicago, IL (84% rating)
Has donated half a million bicycles to developing countries in Africa and India, as well as taught mechanics how to maintain them. They’ve partnered with Trek and World Vision to support local government efforts.

 A slew of NGOs do nothing but extol bicycling, rather than take a proactive role, such as attend group rides and be seen riding bicycles themselves. Some suddenly close for lack of patronage or scandals over embezzlement. You can gain confidence that those you pick still do worthwhile work by visiting Charity Navigator, which provides contacts, ratings, and specifics.

To be clear, not all people can successfully propel a bicycle, no more than operate a motor vehicle. Less than half of Americans have driver licenses. Both require minimal coordination, intelligence, reflexes, and stamina. To coax those who are deficient is to force failures irresponsibly, though you can’t forever shelter them since they are free to behave responsibly and exercise choices that positively impact self and society. Risks from bad habits, cumulative stress, poor diet, and substance abuse are all more deadly, while bicycling has proven to be a cure and deterrent for all of them. Builders make adaptive handcycles, recumbents, and tricycles for paraplegics and those otherwise challenged, while road users are 20 times safer going by bikes than cars.

E-bikes and pedelecs, essentially light motor vehicles, might not belong on bike paths where speed increase isn’t expected by dog walkers, pedestrians, and unwary users. Want to go faster? Be a faster; abstaining and dieting are world’s cheapest hobbies, whereas international food tourism is the most pricey. Bicycle touring fits budgets; bicycle commuting can cut costs of car ownership tenfold. Sadly ironic, bicycling facilitates motoring by freeing space on streets and postponing oil depletion by using no fuel other than meals.

Surely someone is rushing to set up a defense fund for Greta, as any woke cause is worth exploiting. Private fortunes and public appeals supposedly fund animal rescues, earthquake and hurricane relief, green space rallies, nature conservancies, and several dozen related nonprofits when what really happens is directors enlist volunteers to do dirty work and pocket every donation, while results so far are deforestation, devastation, mass extinction, no improvement or reversal of any condition, the opposite of what they purport. A gift of $1,000/year will save no polar bears or whales without policy changes among the worst national offenders, particularly China and USA. They immorally use your angst, guilt and rage as weapons against you, while you to seek zero carbon footprint on your own.

If majority avoids waste, identifies threats, opposes tyranny, recycles avidly, teaches progeny to do same, and uses only what’s necessary to thrive, nature heals and threats lessen. Don’t wait for God, who’s no fan of ecological suicide, to intervene. You can’t be absolved until you acknowledge trespasses, confess sins, forget debts, and forgive others. Yet you can’t ignore or tolerate audacious actors as they rise to mass murder.

When “Captain Obvious” speaks plainly it invites cancelation, censorship, character assassination, innuendo, rumors, and slander. Enlightenment author Denis Diderot observed, “Those who fear the facts will forever try to discredit the fact-finders,” or as folks escalate nowadays, “Kill the messenger.” Have you ever been subtly shushed by having a topic abruptly changed? Ever accused of “being lost in the weeds” when exploring a fuller picture? Maybe you intended all along to alienate, challenge, frustrate, and separate self from uncaring acquaintances. Even worse, have friends and loved ones had their minds poisoned against you when all you sought was cooperative friendships? You will be ostracized for introducing information beyond scope of current conversation even though everything is part of an interconnected fabric from which universe is made, so always holds relevance to some degree.

Though little good comes from sitting in group meetings, and many dismiss scientific tools as utter mendacity, pareto analysis focuses attention on which influences are the most potent, and what to ignore as butterfly flutter or white noise. One can savor privileges within a web of total delusion; in fact, those who do insulate themselves against public tumult, but someone always pays the price of ignorance. Halfwitted bloggers can make a decent living spouting misinformation and opinion that serve someone’s agenda through advertising, grants, or stipends. QAnon numerologist Michael Protzman attracted nearly one hundred thousand followers by claiming Donald Trump, Elvis Presley, and JFK Jr. were cousins descended from Jesus Christ, until killed this summer in a motorcycle accident.

While Bike&Chain appears articulate and informed, observing behaviors and effects accurately, Labann was never smart enough to rake in a blogger’s average of $38,000/year in revenues, rather incurred net losses and wasted 15 years. No individual can solve life’s issues, only act kindly, be useful, follow laws, pursue nonviolence, and serve needs lest be labeled ludicrous and lose liberties.

Strike Soudain

Despite Writer Guild of America’s strike, just resolved, and supporting actions by screen actors and such professionals, some feature films and television programs continue to be released, and there are many existing amusements for just about every taste.

British Pathé filmed daily life a century ago leaving relevant clips as these:
Cycle Town, Copenhagen, Denmark (1923)
National Bicycle Week, Hyde Park, London, England (1923)
The Postman (1940)

Misfit teen heroine Moondance Alexander (Michael Damian, dir., 2007), played by Kay Panabaker, rides her pink stepthrough bike for local transportation and on part time store deliveries, which as advertised expands her horizons. She comes upon a pinto horse loose from its paddock. Upon returning it to owner Dante (Don Johnson), he teaches her to jump Checkers in competition, thus getting one over her snotty school nemesis.

The Year Dolly Parton Was My Mom (Tara Johns, dir., 2011) depicts confused preteen Elizabeth Gray (Julia Sarah Stone), who believes the barren Country Western singer is her mother. She tries to ride her banana bike 500 miles from Winnipeg, Manitoba to Minneapolis, Minnesota, where Dolly was scheduled to perform. Her adoptive mom Marion (Macha Grenon) intercepts her at the US border and tosses her bike off a cliff. Bittersweet but contrived, closest Dolly ever came to appearing near there was Madison, Wisconsin in 1976.

In feature film Barbie (Greta Gerwig, dir., 2023), Beach Ken (Ryan Gosling) dotes on Stereotypical Barbie (Margot Robbie) admidst an idealized matriarchal society, content to play stoker on her tandem. Eventually, Ken dolls rebel and seek patriarchal power until female dolls get them to fight among themselves.

No Hard Feelings (Gene Stupnitsky, dir., 2023) has desperate escort Maddie (Jennifer Lawrence) hired by anxious parents to seduce their reluctant son Percy (Andrew Barth Feldman). She tempts him every way she knows how, including stuffing his bicycle in the back of a van while kidnapping him.

Florence Pugh plays A Good Person (Zach Braff, dir., 2023) cursed with bad luck. Fiddling with smartphone navigator, she crashes into a roadside excavator injuring self and killing her finacé. After a long recovery. she's hooked on opioids and rides a BMX instead of driving.

Grim documentary Amber (Elizabeth Fisher, dir., 2023) delves into unsolved mystery of Amber Rene Hagerman’s disappearance. This 9 year old left home in Arlington Texas on her bicycle only to be found dead 4 days later. Outcry resulted in the so-named Amber Alert System that since has saved lives of over a thousand children.

Because majority views television for events reporting and serial entertainment, effect of WGA strike has been to afford fascist news a free pass to spread lies with too little to counter and expose. Most networks don't incite violence and issue hate speech with relentless enthusiasm. Unbalanced agitation leads to division, terrorism, and treason among disturbed individuals and splinter groups they target. Rupert’s daily assault upon the democracy he loathes doesn’t need guild writers, isn’t scripted, and solicits few advertisers, since they can sustain attack through corporate agendas and private patronage.

How can you stop their 24/7 barrage validated by resultant hate and murder they themselves provoked like some self fulfilling prophecy? You'll never assess degree of damage done to democracy over 146 days of unchallenged opinions. Once late night commentators begin to return next week will anyone notice balance restored?

Is there any point in complaining when narcissists revel in your anguish? Every appeal to fairness just feeds their twisted needs and fortifies their sociopathies. For them schadenfreude is a favored sport. Publishing articles and speaking up publicly confines your arguments to a past that nobody wants to relive, while perpetrators commit new conspiracies nobody wants to admit to being so gullible to allow themselves to be hoodwinked and victimized by.

Slipstream Belain

“The idea of being a ‘serious' cyclist still strikes me as a bit funny. After all, riding is fun.” Bill Chappell, NPR. Really? Cyclists often compare prepping equipment to packing a parachute. Must take in conditions, speeds, terrains, and traffic on rides.

There’s no upside to revealing what’s inside. Despite scriptophobia arising from messenger blame and undeserved shame, no writer can quit confessing, describing, exposing, or expressing what they’ve absorbed through social osmosis belain in this historical slipstream of 130 billion human predecessors while hurtling along hypersonic information currents.

To achieve her new cycling speed record of 296.01 kmh (183.932 mph), Denise Mueller-Korenek took to Utah’s Bonneville Salt Flats, towed behind a jet vehicle, until her giant chain gear bicycle could be pedaled. Drafting behind a fairing, and following thousands of predecessors, she currently stands alone, under conditions few would ever have an opportunity to duplicate or want to. Going so fast for only a moment? Recall someone who nearly doubled that speed racing down a volcano slope. What about elapsed unassisted point to point maximum? A century ago 6-day velodrome racers were happy to lead field and take home a payday. So many conditional records! Why risk certain death for pride marred by an asterisk?

Do none know when end will come? Some receive dire prognoses that specify, though could be wrong by decades. Often worry that riding alongside petroleum exhaust will expose lungs to those 450 carginogens found in fuels. Diesel fumes can trigger fatal asthma. Increasing traffic on unfriendly roads means instant fatalities are ever present. Probably 99% of conspiracy theories are paranoid fantasies that choose familiar comforts and deny painful truths. Worrying about unlikely stuff diverts you from ascertaining actual facts and wastes your time on earth.

What constitutes a life? They falsely say, when all is said and done, more will be said than done. They undervalue commonplace actions, commuting, cooking, eating, gardening, metabolizing, preparing, producing, reflecting, reading, respiring, shopping, sleeping, web surfing, and working, which quietly consume most of your time alive. You hardly get to speak aloud with little incentive to converse with yourself other than mentally. Life is a series of preparations for moments that never arrive alongside catastrophes and tragedies thrust unavoidably upon you. Wise weather whatever adversity overwhelms workers and worrywarts.

Count your blessings this July 4th. While every other national holiday celebrates some celebrity, event, group, or hero, on this those united rejoice The Four Freedoms - from tyranny and want, of religion and speech - ratified by UN and USA as the cornerstone of fairness and justice. But is it just an illusion? It's the perfect time to evaluate by hitting streets on a freedom machine. A billion people go by bike to absorb free vitamin D, avoid traffic, blast flab, boost mood, breathe fresh air, build muscle, buy confidence, cut costs, exercise mind, explore surroundings, extend life, meet locals, thumb nose at automotive paradigm and unexamined conventions, and transport self through space/time. But terrorists and tyrants want to dominate and intimidate, and steal your transportation independence through random gun violence sanctioned by congressional greed and corrupt policies.

Nam June Paik may have coined phrase “electronic superhighway” during 1970’s, but has internet fostered a homogenous or smarter population? Ironically, more facts mean fragmentism, normalization of lies, overthrow of consensus, polarization of politics, and reactions based on too few truths. Before 2000, David Bowie called Internet “the new rock and roll”, and predicted its potential will be unimaginable, “as exhilarating and terrifying as an alien lifeform.”

More humans have died from traffic accidents in last 100 years - considered the bloodiest stretch in history - than soldiers in wars. There's an easy remedy: Deny, revoke or suspend licenses. Any applicant who can't pass an operator test and psyche evaluation shouldn't be driving (or purchasing guns for that matter). It's no imposition: Cities and states provide bike lanes, busses, sidewalks, subways, and trains, all cheaper than owning a motor vehicle, even subsidize bike own/share programs, though controversial among neocons and taxpayers. New Yorkers commute by bike making over 100,000 trips daily, or take taxies or Uber, thereby enjoying plenty of alternatives. Recidivist DUI, OUI, and traffic offenders demonstrate they have diddly capacity to learn civic duties without more drastic measures. Unlike biking, jogging and walking, driving isn’t an inalienable right, but a licensed privilege. Motor pirates and proscribed drivers can already be given jail sentences, though seldom are.

You’d think that side streets with 4-way stops at every intersection would be safer than main avenues with relentless traffic, but you’d be wrong, since so many motorists disobey speed limits and traffic controls where they think nobody notices. Aggression, impatience, and scofflaw defiance are symptoms of sociopathy. 

“[Bicycling’s] like being a bird flying in a sky filled with airplanes: the deafening roar of their engines, their impossible speed, the cruelty of steel, the inescapable menace, the looming sense of catastrophe, your own little wings flapping in silence while theirs slice thunderously.” Jill Lepore, “Bicycles Have Evolved. Have We?” The New Yorker, May, 2022

Peloton, racers, time-trialers, and triathletes compulsively share a need for speed. Look at peloton's furious pace averaging 35 mph during last 10 miles of Etape 4 of Tour. Behooves long distance riders to recall Vélocio’s (Paul de Vivie) Seven Randonneuse Commandments:
1. Take infrequent short stops, so as not to break momentum.
2. Light and frequent meals: Eat before feeling hungry, drink before feeling thirsty.
3. Never go so far as to reach abnormal fatigue, which results in lack of appetite and sleep.
4. Cover before getting cold, disrobe before getting hot, and don't be afraid to expose skin to air, sun, or water.
5, While riding, abstain from meat, tobacco, and wine.
6. Stay within your means, especially early when tempted to force yourself because you feel strong.
7. Never pedal expecting to build self-esteem; remain humble.

And keep your knees in, not flailing out and wasting force. If you consider such advice generally ignored by champions, you’re already a “cicli-junkie” in need of obsession therapy. It’s never just a weekend century, but several days a week of endurance training building up to each randonneur event. Don’t these ring wraiths have wage slave jobs to preclude perpetual practice?

Sarina Tomchin, an endurance athlete of over 100 duathlon, triathlon, and ultra trail running competitions, is the artist/designer/founder of Cycology, a Sydney, Australia based global business selling “cychedelic” cycling apparel online to over 80 countries. Cycology is the name of more than a dozen local bike shops patronized by cycoholics. Also in on this wordplay, Cyclopath Cycling Syndicate shop in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, retails likewise exotic apparel.

The Last Rider (Alex Holmes, dir., 2023) chronicles champion Greg LeMond's nadir year (shotgun victim) and storied Tour de France comeback in 1989, his second of three general classification wins of the July Classic, yet again in progress. To date, Lemond is the last and only American accredited to have won. The director met the retired champion during production of Stop at Nothing (Alex Holmes, dir., 2014) , about now-disgraced cyclist Lance Armstrong, “a man who set out to destroy anyone who questioned his reputation," so made another documentary that instead casts a positive light on cycling heroics. Why is there no statue of Lemond, who made his presence known when they unveiled Major Taylor’s Memorial in Worcester, Massachusetts? France erected one to the late twice winner Laurent Fignon, the competitor Lemond beat.

Tour de France: Unchained (Jamie Batten, dir., 2023), aka Tour de France: Au cœur du peloton [Inside the peloton], is a French language, English subtitled, Netflix series released this June. Both were timed, obviously, to promote interest in world’s biggest spectator event attracting up to fifteen million fans, since free to public, and viewership on broadcasts of one hundred and fifty million. NFL Superbowl sells less than one hundred thousand tickets, though viewership exceeds one hundred million. FIFA World Cup Football draws up to three million spectators, except when hosted in a desert state, though once set a record for viewership at one and a half billion.

"After a long day on my bicycle, I feel refreshed, cleansed, purified. I feel that I have established contact with my environment and that I am at peace. On days like that I am permeated with a profound gratitude for my bicycle. Even if I did not enjoy riding, I would still do it for my peace of mind." Paul de Vivie, cyclotouriste and publisher of Le Cycliste

“There comes a time in every little girl's life when her momma says, ‘Girl, do your best, [be]cause one day you may come to find that all of your life has been a wicked ride.’” Melody Gardot, Wicked Ride, Some Lessons, 2006

Picky Balletomane

Bicycle Day’s 80th Anniversary Poster depicts late cosmic and prolific guitar picker Jerry “Captain Trips” Garcia who had a dominant compositional hand in over 100 albums and 450 songs by The Grateful Dead alone. B&C lists a dozen songs that celebrate April 19th, 1943, the day biochemist Albert Hoffman first dosed himself with LSD and rode home by bicycle gingerly.

Recording a song and releasing to world for free can be a cheap ticket, lawn dart, long shot, or low road to upstart infamy. Pandering to base instincts and hormonal urges will always attract indiscriminate consumers, whereas only a balletomane or critic can appreciate choreography and compositions presented from deep thought, diligent practice, and drop dead talent. Consequently, more chunks of coal exist than multi-caret diamonds, while outputs of consequence get buried beneath payloads of nonsense.

You get to vote which is which among another 5 dozen newly identified tunes directly related to bicycling, most recently released. Surprises how few of them reference e-bikes, which have grown in popularity over last 2 decades, and how many unique titles continue to emerge, as if composers and musical groups had no clue 3,000 others already covered similar emotions and experiences. Would have posted this before Tax Day had not examples kept appearing; probably ought to keep monitoring sources. How many click tracks and glitch beats are needed to capture a clacking chain, dancing derailleur, or whirring wheel?

Alexey Marti, Bicycle [jazz], Travesia, self, 2017

Animal Portraits, Bicycle, Young Mothers EP, 374731 Records DK, 2018

Arno Schubert, Bicycle [hip-hop], single, RNO Records, 2020

BLERTA (Geoff Murphy), Bicycle Song, The Return Trip [soundtrack], EMI Music, 2004; begun in 1970 as Bruno Lawrence Electric Revelation and Traveling Apparition, and compiled in 1976, these humorous short stories and songs chronicle group’s tour of New Zealand.

Calypso Rose, The Bicycle [Trinidad folk], Calypso Rose, Ra, 1968

Contact Lens, Bicycle, Silos, 699663 Records DK, 2020

David Gibb, Rusty Bicycle, Pedal Onwards, Little Seeds Music, 2022; “Rusty bicycle, left out in the rain... grease those gears, oil that chain, else you’re not going to get to ride that bike again.”

Demian Feriy, Bicycle [eam], I, self, 2012

DJ Mahoutsukai feat. Hana Mari, Saki Ibuki, Anzu Kojima & Shino Kuroki, By Bicycle [techno], By Bicycle Ep, simasima, 2023

Dom Whiting, Drum and Bass on the Bike, DJ event videos since 2021

Elias Caldwell, Bicycle [synth], Iridescent, [self], 2023

Eliot Park, Bicycle, Just Be, self, 2018; “Birthday present, oh, what a dream! Shiny red with a sparkly seat. and I can go about a-hundred-and-three on my B-I-C-Y-C-L-E. Saturday, oh, what a day! Rolling down the road through the sun and the shade, no training wheels, no siree... I’m the king of the road on my bicycle, bicycle. Yippee ki-yay, and away we go.”

Ezra Fike, Bicycle, Alphabet Pie, self, 2017

Gerald Taucher. E-bike [Austrian], Zwischen Domois & Heit, self, 2022

Giancarlo Scalzi, Bicycle, Missing Pieces of Scoundrel Rocco, Dimetric Sounds, 2013

Gidiboyy, Bicycle, Gidiboyy Lomo 2, 3666843 Records DK, 2022

HÅN & Killowen, Bicycle [alternative], projections on a human screen, self, 2021

Harlem Yu, Bicycle, The Moonlight That Can’t Be Turned Off, Mandopop, 2013

Indian Summer Jars, feat. Sarah Fiore, Ragbrai, Heart Rock, self, 2014

Janet Blair, Bicycle, Over Under, self, 2020; “Life’s no game of chicken, that bird just doesn’t fly. Love is seeing ours not mine. It’s kinda like the pedals on my child’s bicycle. The pedals lock beneath your feet, you try to make them go. To move the bike along, one of those pedals must come low, snd start the forward cycle: confess, repent, grow.”

John Colleoni, Bicycle (Rev Tribal) [Italian techno], Retrosynthwave, Italian Way Music, 2022

JooJoo, Bicycle Day [acid dark techno], Darkprog Mixtape, self, 2022

Joy Lewis, Bicycle, single, Gabbiani Records, 2021

Keezy, Bicycle [hip-hop], single, self, 2018

Lea Miller, Jr, Bicycle [piano instrumental], In Tenda Nel Bosco [In a Tent in the Woods], Sunshine Music Records, 2021

Lions of the Interstate, Bicycle, Hug Point + Death / Love, self, 2019

Liquor Bike, various titles [post-punk], Neon Hoop Ride, Grass Records, 1994
Liquor Bike, Pavements And Sidewalks, Lowborne, Merkin Records, 1993
A “liquor bike” according to urban slang is any conveyance one uses after losing license to operate a motor vehicle.

Lonnie Park, Bicycle Day [juvenile], My Earth Songs, self, 2020; meant to encourage children to ride ecologically to school in support of UNICEF, so not an LSD reference.

Macbeth, Bicycles [Italian metal in English], Vanitas, Art Music Group, 2002; “Service is suspended, Service shall resume. Service running late again... Cities got new friends that the cities really cared. The looks are trifle shifty, and they’re not about to change. ‘Cos no one likes what they are not, and slowly we're strange, and everyone's buying bicycles. Not the bus, bicycles; Not the train, bicycles.”

Margo Lauritzen, Bicycle [indie alternative], She’s a Scientist, self, 2020; “A bicycle is very nice and you should try it once or twice. A bicycle is very cool; if it breaks you can fix it with bike tools. A bicycle is very clean, it keeps our trees and gardens green. A bicycle is very neat, see them gliding down the street! Bicycle, Bicycle, Bicycle!”

Markus Nikolaus, Bicycle Day [psychedelia], The Acid Kids, Porzellan Bar, 2021; influences include riding a bicycle under LSD during COVID lockdown in downtown Berlin. “But baby, we can be as good as new. Take some acid, take some truth. Take my heart, it’s all for you. Let’s take it back. Going with the bike all day, Bicycle Day; let’s take it back.”

Marwin Fetwig, Bicycle [eam], Secrets, UBM Records, 2022

Masaya Yanagi, Bicycle [jazz], single, self, 2021

Michael Cassady & Paul Rust, RAGBRAI, Don’t Stop or We’ll Die, self, 2022

Midichlorian, Bicycle Day 2023 [synth & spoken word], The Slow Ride, self, 2023

Mr. MoJo, Bicycle Day [dubstep], Bicycle Day Mix 2022, self, 2022

Nancy Kopman, Bicycle [juvenile], The Seasons, self, 2013

Oneul, Do exercise! (Bicycle) [instrumental], Cosy Piano Music, self, 2021

Oolong, Bicycle Day [explicit punk], Edema Ruh split EP, self, 2022; “Finally, biking. Hoping for better things, I won’t even say it... Feel like there’s something with the beat in the air; I’ll follow.”

OV, Otomo Bikes [techno], Figs Compilation, Future Times, 2019

Pavel Dobeš, Bicykle [Czech], K svatku, Parlophone, 2001; “My baby has a bi-bicycle and rides like the wind... She has a bi-bicycle and I have a bi-bicycle. We both ride like the wind.”

Pedro Coudsi, Bicycle [eam], Bicycle, Dreamhop Music, 2022

pijama land, Bicycle, Léopard, Sonder House, 2023

Refeeld, Bicycle [English jazz instrumental], Sunny Weekend, self, 2021

Revival Now!, I Ride My Bike in the Rain, At the First Revelationiest Project, Arkam Records, 2016

Robert Pletzer, E-Bike Song - KitzBühel [Austrian folk], video single, self, 2018

Self Made Man, Bicycle [Swedish], Lust Garden, Heartwork Records, 1990

Soleil Rouge, Bicycle [synth], Evolving, 2022

Sukisha. Bicycle [J-pop in Japanese], Beside Your Bedside, self, 2019

Swanky, Bicycle Day [synth], 1943, self, 2023

The Falderals, Bicycle [folk], Love Everything, self, 2019

The Gray Goo, Bicycle Day [psychedelic doom funk], 1943, self, 2022; single track bicyclists from Montana open their debut album with 10 minutes of heavy vibe a bit reminiscent of Mogwai, Hunted by a Freak.

The Penelopes, Bicycle [synth], SpaceBoy [soundtrack], Pour Le Monde, 2021

The Singing Lizard, Bicycle [juvenile], Make Believe, AlphaBeat Records, 2014

Timothy Eerie, Bicycle, Ritual, Nomad Eel Records, 2019

Tom San Filippo, Bicycle Day, single, self, 2023; “The genie's out of the bottle; explain I cannot till my words and my mind stop to soar. Reality shattered, and from here, ever after, perception has opened her doors. Dear Mrs Hoffman, there’s been a problem…”

Trachta (Francis Trachta), Bicycle, Differences, self, 2012

Trophy Jump, Bicycle [Croatian in English], Haphazard, Horn & Hoof Records, 2019; “Dominik once said that he would beat a bike thief dead; that’s the only person that he would murder. Must be really sad to lose your two-wheeled friend to a guy that's definitely not worth her. What kind of person you must be to steal some stranger's property, especially if you steal a bicycle, then you must be the worst dude in the world.”

Wurmy Wormfield (Charles Herman-Wurmfeld) & friends, Bicycle Day [juvenile], fangtasia music, 2021

Xdinary Heroes, Bicycle [K-pop], video, JYP Entertainment, 2023

You Anin, Bicycle [techno], Inside, self, 2018

Word Spokane

Spokane, a city in Washington State in nation's Northwest, has a sense of whimsy. Someopne risked death or serious injury to install a bicycle, properly wired down, high on an abandoned concrete pier smack dab in Spokane River late last year, leaving residents to speculate as to its installation and intention. Need life be more mysterious than it is already?

Scenes of gentle folk bicycling pepper biopic Jesus Revolution (Jon Erwin & Brent McCorkle, dirs., 2023). Lonnie Frisbee (Jonathan Roumie) changes minds and inspires hope when his hippie ideals get applied in church of Pastor Greg Laurie (Kelsey Grammer). Edgar Winter Group’s Free Ride (1972) naturally fits film score: “I've come here to give you a hand, and lead you into the promised land. So, come on and take a free ride... We gotta do better, it's time to begin. You know all the answers must come from within.” Dramatizes Jesus Freak Movement that coexisted alongside Disco/Drug Inferno of early 1970’s.

Lifetime Network's original film Every Breath She Takes (Darin Scott, dir., 2023) has bicyclist Jules Baker (Tamala Jones) falling for a suave lover, Billy (Brian White). Once married, her savage husband physically and verbally abuses her, so she files for divorce. Crazy to reconcile, stalker Billy sets their home on fire and succumbs in flames. Or does he?

Vraylar Spot has a bipolar bicyclist who buys a child seat at a bike shop, gets a box of cookies at a bakery, then picks up her son from school riding throughout.

Boy scouts bike about in The Fabelmans (Steven Spielberg, dir., 2022), an autobiographical look at director's teen years. Lends personal authenticity to similar scenes in his blockbusters, like E.T. 

Upgrade.com Spot “Bike Shop: Triple Cash Back” (July, 2022), has a couple discussing merits of buying an e-bike as opposed to continuing to ride their debt donkey.

Twicycle has handlebars that its rider can crank to propel bike along with tradition leg twitches.

On Her Own (Fabienne Engel, dir., 2022) documents how Wiebke Lühmann took a month off to go bikepacking 3,500 km solo and unsupported from Hamburg, Germany to North Cape, Norway during height of summer in 2022. On one hand it looked more like winter above Arctic Circle along a gorgeous but rainy route. On other, almost no traffic meant zero human hassles while honking 120 km per 12 hour day, then hunkering against weather overnight.

Carmen (Valerie Buhagiar, dir., 2021) has title character (Natascha McElhone) evicted from church rectory, where she spent her life from teenage as a maid for her brother, a recently deceased pastor of a small Maltese church. Finally free, she embarks on a series of adventures, including learning to ride a bicycle, and surviving by irreverent and unexpected means.

In his Emmy winning documentary Paper and Glue (JR, dir., 2021) humanistic French artist JR celebrates ordinary people and chooses California’s Tehachapi Supermax Prison as another intimate space to plaster giant images on paper producing a collage of incarcerated felons and their families as members of an interconnected society.

Based on Mitali Perkins’s young adult novel, Bangladeshi drama Rickshaw Girl (Amitabh Reza Chowdhury, dir., 2021) introduces feisty teen muralist Naima (Novera Rahman). After her cyclo pedaling father gets injured, mother sends her to a big city to earn money and help family. To escape domestic servitude, she disguises herself as a boy and follows in father’s footsteps as a rickshaw operator. Naima’s creativity doesn’t quit as she still decorates rickshaw and paints murals. Will her emergence as an artist save her?

After most of humanity is wiped out, Elle Fanning happens upon a town’s sole survivor, Peter Dinklage. I Think We’re Alone Now (Reed Morano, dir., 2018) covers his obsession to bury victims and clean their homes while pocketing valuable resources, particularly batteries. She bikes around contentedly and doesn’t tell him that there are thousands of survivors still living nearby, until a couple who had enslaved her show up to reclaim her.

Parolee Chris Connelly (Jay Duplass) goes for a bike ride with Hildy Beasley (Kaitlyn Dever) after her mom Carol rejects his romantic advances in Canadian indie film Outside In (Lynn Shelton, dir., 2017).

In 1940 on day in question, April 9th (Roni Ezra, dir., 2015), mustered Danish reserve soldiers ask why they were called up, but suspect it’s because Germans were seen gathering at their border. Unit is sent south on bicycles to hold off invaders until reinforcements arrive.

Invisible Sue (Matkus Dietrich, dir., 2012) and her BMX boyfriend ride e-bikes to search for her kidnapped mom.

Stewart Parker’s Spokesong [Dublin, 1975] is about religious warfare between Catholics and Protestants that has kept this poet/playwright’s homeland, North of Ireland, a battleground for previous 5 decades. While not a musical, a chorus figure, called the Trick Cyclist, who embodies the spirit of Belfast, sings most of its songs. Action takes place in a local bike shop, which among many once solicited sales by employing stunt riders.

Yesteryear’s great black superstar Marshall “Major” Taylor began his record setting career doing exactly that while wearing a military uniform, thus the nickname, in his native city of Indianapolis, before enticed to race by a shop back east, hence also known as “The Worcester Whirlwind”.