Monday, October 7, 2013

Hijack McClane

Men argue unfounded opinions more heatedly than scientific certainties. It's how they roll into battle, perhaps because they've hijacked role models. Since last century that usually signifies antiheroes and individuals beset with impossible tasks not of their own choosing. Sorry to have overlooked scene in Die Hard with a Vengeance (1998) where NYC Detective John McClane (Bruce Willis) and Zeus Carver (Samuel L. Jackson) commandeer bikes from Bowery boys because some bad guy Simon says, not their finest hour. The pair worked together earlier in Pulp Fiction (1994), only then Willis rode off on dead Zedd's chopper.

More recently Argo (2012) had Ben Affleck attempting to rescue six American Embassy workers hiding in Iran after Shah's fall. One rejected exodus scenario was to have them all ride bicycles to the Iraqi border 400 miles away. They were supposed to fit in with locals frequently seen riding in this multi-award, Oscar winning film. Can't blame them for jetting out moments ahead of capture.

Self sacrifice falls under the profound phoniness of capitalist expectations for everyone except superhero businessmen on white fixies. Why unilaterally assume risks? You can hardly expect cyclists not to ask themselves this before braving streets devoid of decency where wage earners race thoughtlessly to mundane posts assumed to serve deceit and inhumanity. Welcome to the jungle. When fear rules every transaction becomes a slugfest.

From the previous century, women role models like Annie Londonderry helped half of the population gain human rights with none of the aforementioned bluster and machismo. So salute ladies on wheels without objectifying them. Be grateful they reverse the relentless stress of testosterone.

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